What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood | Parenting Tips From Funny Moms Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson

What Fresh Hell Podcast is going on tour across the Northeast US this fall! Join us for a live version of the podcast and bring all your mom friends. We can’t wait to go back on the road! https://bit.ly/whatfreshhelltour
“God never gives you more than you can handle.” “Look on the bright side.” “It could be worse.” These are examples of toxic positivity. They're platitudes we’ve all heard and we all know are (to say the least) less than helpful.
So why do people feel the need to put a good spin on things when disaster strikes, and how do we break out of that habit? We talk about our own experiences with toxic positivity, what we’ve learned from them, and what we’re still working on.
In this episode, we discuss:

How overvaluing positives functions as a survival mechanism

Why toxic positivity actually makes us less happy

How to counter toxic positivity and how to stay graceful towards people who offer us outlooks we may not want or need


Here are links to some of the articles we discuss in this episode:

Brock Bastian and Ashley Humphrey for The Conversation: “How to avoid ‘toxic positivity’ and take the less direct route to happiness”


Allyson Chiu for The Washington Post : Time to ditch ‘toxic positivity,’ experts say: ‘It’s okay not to be okay’


Elizabeth Bernstein for The Wall Street Journal : Toxic Positivity Is Very Real, and Very Annoying



Links to other episodes that mention toxic positivity:

Fresh Take: Kate Bowler on the Truths We Need To Hear

Fresh Take: Taylor Harris on Motherhood, Genetics, and Facing the Unknown


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mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, toxic positivity
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What Fresh Hell Podcast is going on tour across the Northeast US this fall! Join us for a live version of the podcast and bring all your mom friends. We can’t wait to go back on the road! https://bit.ly/whatfreshhelltour
How do the stereotypes we harbor about raising boys harm them in the long term? Ruth Whipmann, author of BOYMOM: REIMAGINING BOYHOOD IN THE AGE OF IMPOSSIBLE MASCULINITY, discusses what most modern parenting advice misses when it comes to raising boys.
Ruth, Margaret, and Amy discuss:

why so much parenting advice for boys has historically sidelined the role of mothers

the ways in which the emotional lives of boys are suppressed

how to be "annoying in service of the project" of changing the conversation in your own family


Here's where you can find Ruth:

https://www.ruthwhippman.com

@ruthwhippman on X and IG

Follow Ruth on Substack: https://substack.com/@ruthwhippman


Buy BOYMOM: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593577639



We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
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mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, feminism, raising boys, boyhood
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What Fresh Hell Podcast is going on tour across the Northeast US this fall! Join us for a live version of the podcast and bring all your mom friends. We can’t wait to go back on the road! https://bit.ly/whatfreshhelltour
Most of us hear “bullying” and picture a sand-kicking, lunch-money-stealing menace. But today’s bullying can take other forms. Research by Dr. Charisse Nixon shows that about 7% of kids report experiencing physical aggression once a week— but that HALF of kids report experiencing relational aggression at least once a month. 
On the other hand, as bullying expert Signe Whitson explains, some things get termed “bullying” that are more correctly described as mean or rude. Knowing the difference as parents will help our children navigate these waters more effectively. 
In this episode we discuss how to help our children understand what bullying is, plus how to know if our kids are being bullied themselves— since it’s the kids who are truly frightened and struggling who are often the most likely not to tell us. 
We also discuss whether, how much, and in what ways parents should intervene— somewhere in the middle ground between “so find new friends!” and beating the bully up yourself. (Spoiler alert: don’t do either of those things.) 

Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in this episode:

Katie Hurley for Washington Post On Parenting: "What does childhood anxiety look like? Probably not what you think."


Katie Hurley for PBS Kids: What to Do If Your Child Is Being Bullied


Sherri Gordon for Very Well Family: 7 Tips for Helping Kids Deal With Being Ostracized


Sumathi Reddy for WSJ: Little Children and Already Acting Mean


Signe Whitson for Huffington Post: Rude Vs. Mean Vs. Bullying: Defining The Differences


Louis Sachar: There's a Boy in the Girls' Bathroom 



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We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
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mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, bullying, bullies, bullied
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What Fresh Hell Podcast is going on tour across the Northeast US this fall! Join us for a live version of the podcast and bring all your mom friends. We can’t wait to go back on the road! https://bit.ly/whatfreshhelltour
Hooray, summer is finally here! No more French quizzes or spirit days to dress for last minute! So now what? Million-dollar summer camps? Kicking our kids outside from sunup to sundown so they don't drive us crazy?
Here's how to give everyone, including yourself, a sane summer that won't send you into bankruptcy.
Margaret and Amy discuss:

Why summer light affects our mood

Summer camp inflation

Farmer's almanac predictions - here are the 2024 predictions



Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:

Johns Hopkins School of Public Health: 7 Things To Know About Daylight Savings Time


Michele Marchetti & Mia Taylor for Parents: How To Handle the Rising Costs of Summer Camp


American Camp Association: How To Afford Camp



We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/

mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, mom guilt
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During the pandemic, most moms hit a breaking point. All of the increased labor of childcare, at-home teaching, and caregiving seemed to land mostly, or only, on their plates. It was a clarifying moment for many of us that things simply could not continue as they were going—and that perhaps they had been going that way for a long time.
Jessica Calarco is a Professor of Sociology at the University of Wisconsin and the author of the new book HOLDING IT TOGETHER: How Women Became America's Safety Net. In this interview, discusses the forces that place the burden of childcare and domestic labor on women.
Jessica, Amy, and Margaret discuss:

how societal expectations around motherhood have always pointed toward a lack of choices

how "mom guilt" is weaponized to ensure women keep doing more than their share

what Jessica calls "DIY society," and why it's a myth


Here's where you can find Jessica:

https://www.jessicacalarco.com

@JessicaCalarco on X

Buy HOLDING IT TOGETHER: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593538128



We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
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mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, mom guilt
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We've both traveled with our extended families over and over again, and have loved the memories we've made together. But different bedtimes, sightseeing styles, and mealtime expectations can lead to unexpected conflict.
Laura in our Facebook group wrote in to say:
"Might be a fun episode before summer: large family vacation traditions. I'm wondering if there are favorite games/foods/tips/funny stories on going away with lots of members of your non-immediate family."
As usual, our listeners responded with great tips for maintaining both organization and sanity when vacationing with extended family, and in this episode we discuss them all, including:

Which conversations to have ahead of time—and which conversations never to have at all

Systems for family vacations that don't fall on one person (or one gender) to execute

Limiting your non-negotiables as a nuclear family ahead of time


We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/
mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, vacations, family vacations, vacations with kids
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