Adoption Wise Lisa C. Qualls and Melissa Corkum

Lisa and Amber Reynolds (our Director of Communications) chat about the challenges of parenting a young child struggling with mental illness. Amber shares candidly about what she wishes she had done differently, how her son's mental illness affected her health, and how she's overcoming blocked care. As an Enneagram 8, Amber loves advocating well for all those in her care. She and her husband, Chris, have been foster parents for seven years and have three children through adoption.

Click here to download a transcript for this episode.



Relevant Links

Connect with Amber on Instagram

Join Reclaim Compassion

Generally, what we carry into our childhoods and throughout our adulthood is part of a wider series, even patterns, of behavior, traumas, and worldviews. In this workshop, Dr. Stoker will give a very brief overview of Family Systems theory. You will learn:



* highlights for Family Systems theory

* a narrative that will assist you in seeing systems more objectively

* tools to heal and offer hope for those with whom you live and serve



Dr. Andy Stoker (he/him) is married to Megan, and they are parents to two sons, Alex (20) and Wesley (15). Andy is an ordained United Methodist minister, holds a secular PhD in Family Science, and is a certified mindfulness meditation teacher in the Western Buddhist tradition. He currently serves as the Senior Pastor of Central United Methodist Church in Albuquerque, New Mexico. For over two decades, Andy advocated for justice, fairness, equity, and inclusiveness in the Dallas area in the areas of public education, fair employment, healthcare access, and housing justice. In his free time, he co-hosts a parenting podcast with a psychologist and pediatrician called “Parenting for the Present."

Click here to download a transcript for this episode.



Relevant Links

Connect with Andy on Instagram

Parenting for the Present podcast

Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue* by Edwin H. Friedman

Bowen Theory's Secrets* by Michael Kerr

The Bowen Center on Youtube

A Family Genogram Workbook* by by Israel Galindo, Elaine Boomer, and Don Reagan

*this is an affiliate link

Foster care and adoption are full of ambiguous losses and disenfranchised grief. In this episode, Lisa and Melissa discuss the gap between expectations and reality which can lead to feelings of grief. They offer tangible practices, including writing, verbal processing, and bodywork. The importance of acknowledging and processing darker emotions such as sadness, anger, or resentment without judgment is emphasized. Lastly, they mention adapting these practices for children experiencing similar grief and loss.

Click here to download a transcript for this episode.



Relevant Links

Reclaim Compassion: The Adoptive Parent's Guide to Overcoming Blocked Care with Neuroscience and Faith* by Qualls and Corkum

#33: Grieving the unexpected losses in adoption

#121: An Introduction to Trauma & Tension Release Exercise (TRE) with Christa Bevan

FREE Facebook Group

 

* this is an affiliate link

Rebekah Cook shares her experiences of fostering children of incarcerated moms through a ministry called Jonah's Journey. She emphasizes the importance of establishing a relationship with the biological parents and discusses the unique challenges and rewards of this type of foster care. Rebekah also touches on her struggle with blocked care and how she sought support and healing.

Rebekah is a stay at home mom and former elementary school teacher who is passionate about loving and serving vulnerable moms in her community. She and her husband, Josh, are parents to 7 kids through birth, adoption and foster care. They are also loving their newest roles as grandparents to two little ones!

Click here to download a transcript for this episode.



Relevant Links

Jonah's Journey

One of the signs of blocked care is isolation. In this episode, Lisa and Melissa chat about the importance of building supportive communities in virtual and real-life spaces. They recommend parents seek out and engage in safe, validating communities where they can discuss their challenges openly. All parents need to fill up their "relationship bucket" in order to maintain compassionate parenting.

Click here to download a transcript for this episode.



Relevant Links

Join Reclaim Compassion

Join our free Facebook group

House of Eve* by Sadeqa Johnson

* this is an affiliate link

This week we answer listener questions such as:



What resources would you recommend for Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)?

Do you have any wisdom to share about parenting a teenager with borderline personality disorder?

What if things don't get better?



Click here to download the transcript for this episode.



Relevant Links

PDA Masterclass

Melissa's Ted Talk on Redefining Success

The Gap and the Gain Podcast