Grief & Triggers with my Adult Man Children

Belinda Stark
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Welcome to Midlife Sparkle with Belinda Stark – the podcast that celebrates the messy, magical middle of life. I'm Belinda Stark – coach, writer, mum, and midlife cheerleader. I know firsthand how this season can feel like a rollercoaster: one minute you're craving change, the next you're clinging to what's familiar. Whether you're navigating menopause, identity shifts, career pivots, or relationships evolving, this podcast is your reminder that you're not alone – and it's not too late to reclaim your sparkle. Each week, you'll hear honest conversations with inspiring women, expert voices, and real stories from the messy middle. We’ll explore everything from mindset and wellbeing to alcohol, ageing, motherhood, purpose, and the quiet courage it takes to start again. This is your space for reflection, laughter, lightbulb moments, and gentle nudges forward – no perfectionism, pressure, or pretending required. Let’s rewrite the rules of midlife, one story at a time.

  1. 4 FEB

    Grief & Triggers with my Man Children

    Send us a text Grief can sneak up on you in the quiet after the routines end. When the youngest finishes school and the oldest turns 30, the house feels different, the weekends lose their map, and you start to ask, who am I now that no one needs me at the sidelines? I share the real, unpolished story of how those milestones pulled hidden threads—old Bathurst memories, a brush with postnatal depression, and the sting of feeling invisible—and how naming them helped me find steadier ground. We explore the subtle losses that come with midlife: the vanishing school drop-offs, the end of team sport Sundays, and the social glue of familiar faces. A 30th birthday at Pearl Beach brings pride and a surprising ache as childhood friends return as partners and parents. Digitising old VHS tapes turns into a time machine, making joy and melancholy sit side by side. Then a TV snippet of Bathurst reopens 1995, reminding me that trauma doesn’t need to be capital T to carve deep grooves. With support, I learned to call it what it was and to let grief be part of growth, not a sign of failure. This is a raw, solo passion project—no producers, no music, just honest reflection about depression, identity shifts, and the search for purpose when motherhood changes shape. I talk through practical ways to rebuild structure and community, from small rituals to creative work that restores agency. If you’ve wondered where you fit once the routines fade, you’ll find language here for what hurts and what heals, and gentle steps toward feeling seen again. If this resonates, follow the show so you get notified when new episodes drop, share it with someone who might need it, and email me your questions or topics you want me to cover. Your stories help us all find our midlife sparkle.

    12 min

  2. 29 JAN

    My burn out & depression in 2025 (in a nutshell)!

    Send us a text Welcome back to Midlife Sparkle — and welcome to 2026. In this solo episode, I share why it’s been a while, and what’s been happening behind the scenes. It’s an honest and vulnerable look at my personal journey through midlife depression, burnout, and the quiet unraveling that so many women go through — often without realising it. Late last year, I experienced a slow-building return of depression. I’ve faced depression before — including postnatal depression after the birth of my first son — but this time was different. Despite everything I know as a coach, speaker, and someone who should have seen the signs… I didn’t. Or maybe I couldn’t. It crept in quietly, disguised as busyness and burnout. As I look back, I can now see the signs of burnout in midlife: pushing hard in my coaching business, pivoting my niche, ignoring my own energy levels, and slowly disconnecting from myself. I was trying to “get it right”, especially after shifting from alcohol-coaching to focusing more broadly on midlife identity, change, and empowerment. The irony? The more I tried to niche, the more I lost touch with what lit me up. And what lights me up is this: supporting women to reconnect with themselves. Helping women who feel flat, lost, or invisible in midlife. Telling real stories. Speaking about the things we don’t say out loud — like feeling burnt out, low, or unsure of who we are anymore. This episode is the beginning of a series where I’ll unpack depression, burnout, recovery, and how to rebuild from that place. Today’s share is just the nutshell — a warm-up for what’s to come. If you’re a woman navigating midlife shifts — emotional, hormonal, career, identity — and wondering, “Is this just me?”… it’s not. You’re not alone. Topics in this episode: My personal experience with depression in midlifeWhat burnout looked and felt like for meThe signs I missed (and now see clearly)How my business pivot added pressure I didn’t expectWhy I’m shifting focus back to real connection, storytelling, and empowermentThank you for tuning in. More to come soon.

    10 min

  3. 02/12/2025

    A Quick Chrissy Hello!

    Send us a text Keywords midlife, boundaries, self-care, achievements, workshops, Christmas, emotional well-being, personal growth, women empowerment, journaling In this episode of Midlife Sparkle, Belinda reflects on the year 2025 and shares insights on navigating midlife challenges, particularly around the holiday season. She discusses the importance of setting boundaries, recognizing personal achievements, and taking time for self-care. Belinda also introduces upcoming workshops aimed at supporting women in their midlife journey, emphasizing the need for community and connection during this transformative stage of life. Takeaways Belinda emphasizes the importance of community in midlife. Setting boundaries is crucial during the holiday season. Reflecting on achievements can boost self-esteem. Self-care is essential, especially during emotionally charged times. Workshops and retreats can provide valuable support. Journaling can help track personal growth and achievements. It's okay to feel a mix of emotions during the holidays. Taking small moments for oneself can make a difference. Belinda encourages women to embrace their journey in midlife. The next chapter can be a positive and fulfilling experience. Chapters 00:00 Welcome to Midlife Sparkle 01:01 Navigating Midlife Challenges 02:58 Setting Boundaries During the Holidays 04:46 Reflecting on Achievements and Self-Care In this episode of Midlife Sparkle, Belinda reflects on the year 2025 and shares insights on navigating midlife challenges, particularly around the holiday season. She discusses the importance of setting boundaries, recognizing personal achievements, and taking time for self-care. Belinda also introduces upcoming workshops aimed at supporting women in their midlife journey, emphasizing the need for community and connection during this transformative stage of life. takeaways Belinda emphasizes the importance of community in midlife.Setting boundaries is crucial during the holiday season.Reflecting on achievements can boost self-esteem.Self-care is essential, especially during emotionally charged times.Workshops and retreats can provide valuable support.Journaling can help track personal growth and achievements.It's okay to feel a mix of emotions during the holidays.Taking small moments for oneself can make a difference.Belinda encourages women to embrace their journey in midlife.The next chapter can be a positive and fulfilling experience.

    7 min

  4. 25/11/2025

    Identity Loss

    Send us a text In this solo episode of Midlife Sparkle, I dive into one of the most common and quietly painful experiences for women in their forties, fifties, and beyond - losing our sense of identity. For so long, we’ve worn countless hats: mother, partner, school mum, business owner, team player, caregiver, organiser - the list goes on. But as life shifts - kids grow up, parents age, careers plateau or change - many of us find ourselves asking, Who am I now? I explore the emotional and practical realities of this stage of life - the boredom, loneliness, and uncertainty that can creep in - and why rediscovering your values is the key to reconnecting with who you truly are. Together, we unpack what values really mean, how they act as your inner compass, and how to start realigning your life around what matters most to you. Whether your values centre on family, freedom, creativity, or health, this episode guides you to reflect deeply and start finding your way back to yourself. You’ll hear how I help my clients (and myself) identify what they value most, using practical exercises to gain clarity, confidence, and direction. By leaning into these truths, you’ll rediscover joy and purpose in your next chapter - because midlife isn’t the end; it’s the perfect time to begin again. Key Takeaways Rediscovering your identity in midlife begins with understanding your core values.Your values act as a compass, guiding your decisions and helping you feel more connected to yourself.Reflect on when you’ve felt happiest, most fulfilled, or proud - these moments reveal what truly matters to you.Write down your values - with pen and paper - to deepen your self-awareness and accountability.Accept that values evolve; what mattered most in your thirties may shift in your fifties, and that’s perfectly natural.Actions You Can Take Today Take 20 minutes to journal about a moment when you felt proud or fulfilled - what does it say about your values?Narrow your list of values to five that feel most important right now.Ask yourself, Am I living in alignment with these?Start making small changes that reflect what matters to you - whether that’s creativity, connection, or calm.Remember: midlife is your time to put you first.If this episode resonated, I’d love you to share it with another woman in midlife who’s navigating her own sense of self. You’re not alone in this - we’re all rediscovering our sparkle together.

    14 min

  5. 18/11/2025

    Anxious Annie

    Send us a text In this episode of Midlife Sparkle, I explore a familiar feeling for so many of us - anxiety. I call mine Anxious Annie, and she’s been with me most of my life. Annie has a way of showing up when things feel uncertain, whispering fearful thoughts about what might happen. She loves to predict the future, and in her world, it’s never good news. I share how anxiety can take hold when we face change - whether it’s a new job, a big decision, or even closing a business, as I did. I talk about what it felt like to be consumed by fear and self-doubt, and how I learned to manage Annie’s voice with practical, grounding strategies that really work. Through my own story and examples from my clients, I unpack how anxiety convinces us that disaster is coming - and how to gently challenge that thinking. We look at how to separate fact from fiction, bring ourselves back into the present, and use physical and mindset tools to calm our nervous system. You’ll learn how to: Recognise when anxiety is future-tripping and creating false stories.Use grounding techniques like deep breathing, shaking out your body, barefoot grounding, or immersing your hands in cold water.Calm your mind through humming, writing, or reflection.Challenge anxious thoughts by asking, “Is this 100 per cent factual truth?”Develop self-trust by doing the thing anyway - even when fear tells you not to.I also share a client story that beautifully illustrates how our minds can spiral into worry when the reality is often far kinder than we imagine. By naming our anxiety voice, we create distance from it, and by accepting it with compassion, we regain control. Key takeaway: You are not your anxiety. When you name it, challenge it, and soothe it, you take back your power. Action step: Next time your version of Anxious Annie pipes up, pause and ask yourself: Is what she’s saying actually true? Then breathe, move, or write it out. The truth is always calmer than the story in your head.

    12 min

  6. 11/11/2025

    Comparison Connie

    Send us a text In this solo episode of Midlife Sparkle, I dive into a topic that affects so many of us – comparison. I call mine Comparison Connie – one of the many little voices that have followed me through life. She loves to pop up when I’m feeling a bit uncertain or depleted and whisper things like “She’s doing better than you” or “You’ll never look like that.” Sound familiar? I explore how comparison shows up for women, especially in midlife, when we’re juggling so many roles and responsibilities and might feel a little unsure about where we fit in. Whether it’s comparing bodies at the beach, houses on Instagram, or career success at a dinner table, this habit can leave us feeling small and disconnected from ourselves. The truth is, comparison is an ancient survival instinct – our brains are wired to keep us safe and help us belong. But in today’s world, that wiring can backfire. The good news? We can rewire our thinking and create new pathways that focus on gratitude, self-compassion, and progress rather than perfection. In this episode, I share how to recognise when Comparison Connie is running the show, practical ways to quiet her down, and why naming her (yes, literally giving her a name) can help you detach from her voice. You’ll learn how to challenge those sneaky beliefs she plants, replace them with kinder truths, and redirect your focus to your own lane. We talk about: Why comparison is rooted in a desire to belong.How perfectionism feeds comparison and paralysis.The power of gratitude in shifting your mindset.Why sitting with the discomfort of comparison brings clarity.The importance of curiosity and compassion in changing old habits.If you’ve ever scrolled through social media and felt that sinking feeling, or found yourself measuring your worth against someone else’s, this episode is for you. You’ll walk away with tangible tools to help you stay grounded in your own story, silence that inner voice, and rediscover your confidence. Key Takeaway: Comparison is the thief of joy – and you can take your joy back by focusing on gratitude, progress, and your own beautiful lane.

    14 min

  7. 04/11/2025

    Critical Cassie

    Send us a text In this episode of Midlife Sparkle, I’m diving into a solo chat about a familiar voice most of us know far too well - our inner critic. Mine’s called Critical Cassie, and she’s been with me since childhood. Maybe you’ve got one too - that little voice that tells you you’re not smart enough, not thin enough, or not doing enough. I’ve decided to give mine a name because it helps me remember that she’s not me - she’s just a voice, and I get to choose how loud she is. I talk about how these inner voices form - from childhood influences, parents, teachers, partners, or past experiences - and how they can quietly shape the way we think and behave as adults. Cassie is the leader of my inner critic crew, but she’s got plenty of company: Anxious Annie, Guilty Gabby, Rejection Rebecca, and Comparison Connie are just a few of her sidekicks. They all have something to say, but it’s time we learned how to manage them rather than let them run the show. During the episode, I walk through a simple but powerful exercise to help you take control. It starts with closing your eyes, placing your hands on your heart, and visualising your critic speaking. Then you turn her volume down - literally imagine her voice getting quieter. It’s an incredible reminder that you have control over her, not the other way around. I also share how we can build a relationship with our critic instead of trying to silence her. When you accept her presence and even show her gratitude for trying to protect you, her voice starts to soften. She’s part of us, but she doesn’t define us. The real power comes when we start questioning what she says. A favourite strategy of mine - and one I use with clients - is to challenge those beliefs directly. Ask yourself, “Can I say without a shadow of a doubt that what she’s saying is 100% true?” The answer is always no. We can change these old beliefs; our brains are beautifully malleable thanks to neuroplasticity. This episode isn’t about silencing your critic completely - she’ll always be there - but about learning how to turn her down, understand her purpose, and live more freely. Key takeaways and actions: Start by naming your critic to separate her from your true self. Accept that she’s part of you but not in charge. Write her a letter, record a voice note, or even send her an email to express what you need to say. Then question her beliefs — are they facts or old stories? Finally, remember that building a kinder relationship with your inner critic gives the real you space to grow louder, stronger, and far more confident.

    18 min

  8. 28/10/2025

    Dr Filipa Bellette

    Send us a text In this episode of Midlife Sparkle, I sit down with Dr Filipa Bellette, or “Philly” as she prefers to be known. She’s the co-founder of the multi-award-winning health practice Chris & Filly Functional Medicine, an author, accredited clinical nutritionist, functional medicine practitioner, coach and trauma therapist. Alongside her husband, Chris, she has helped more than two and a half thousand clients overcome chronic burnout, fatigue and overwhelm through a deep root-cause approach. Filly’s passion for this work stems from her own experience with severe burnout. From fainting and fitting as a teenager to complete body shutdown after having children, her story is both relatable and eye-opening. She talks candidly about what it felt like to juggle motherhood, business and study while her body was breaking down - how she tried everything from nutrition and supplements to lab testing - and how none of it truly worked until she addressed the deep-seated belief that she was weak and incapable. Our conversation goes far beyond the usual wellness chat. Filly explains what body burnout actually is, how it differs from workplace burnout, and how chronic stress literally rewires our nervous system and physiology. She shares how stress hormones such as cortisol keep us stuck in fight-or-flight mode, and how that affects our mood, energy, hormones and gut health. We also unpack the root-cause approach she uses in her clinic - combining functional medicine with trauma-informed therapy. She outlines how every habit and coping mechanism (from overworking and perfectionism to alcohol or sugar) is linked to a deep-rooted belief about ourselves. Healing happens, she says, when we finally listen to what the body is trying to tell us. One of my favourite parts of our chat is when Filly describes how true recovery often comes from the simplest things - rest, grounding, sunlight and reconnecting with nature. She shares a beautiful practice: taking off your shoes, sitting on the grass, placing your hand on your heart and asking your body what it needs. Filly’s story is a powerful reminder that burnout isn’t a badge of honour - it’s a message. A message to slow down, listen, and rebuild from the inside out. Key takeaways and actions: If you’re feeling tired, irritable or unmotivated, don’t dismiss it as “just midlife” or “too many responsibilities”. It might be your body’s way of asking for help. Start by slowing down, even for five minutes a day. Step outside, breathe fresh air and tune into what your body is saying. Look beyond surface fixes - better sleep, nutrition and supplements are important, but the deeper work lies in changing the beliefs that drive your busyness and stress. Healing begins when you decide you are worthy of rest, health and ease.

    37 min
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About

Welcome to Midlife Sparkle with Belinda Stark – the podcast that celebrates the messy, magical middle of life. I'm Belinda Stark – coach, writer, mum, and midlife cheerleader. I know firsthand how this season can feel like a rollercoaster: one minute you're craving change, the next you're clinging to what's familiar. Whether you're navigating menopause, identity shifts, career pivots, or relationships evolving, this podcast is your reminder that you're not alone – and it's not too late to reclaim your sparkle. Each week, you'll hear honest conversations with inspiring women, expert voices, and real stories from the messy middle. We’ll explore everything from mindset and wellbeing to alcohol, ageing, motherhood, purpose, and the quiet courage it takes to start again. This is your space for reflection, laughter, lightbulb moments, and gentle nudges forward – no perfectionism, pressure, or pretending required. Let’s rewrite the rules of midlife, one story at a time.

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