124 episodes

Helping you identify toxic communication, emotional abuse, manipulation, and other forms of bad behavior in relationships. Love and Abuse gives you the perspective of both the victim and the perpetrator. Full of tips and advice for your friendships, family, love life, and marriage.

You'll learn about covert abusive communication that takes away your power. And you'll discover how to pinpoint the specific toxic behaviors, such as narcissistic abuse and verbal abuse, before you are dragged into a game so deep you come out a shell of your former self.

Love and Abuse is the official podcast of The M.E.A.N. Workbook, an assessment and healing guide to help you evaluate the emotionally abusive and manipulative patterns in your relationship. Get the guide that will tell you exactly what's happening in your relationship over at loveandabuse.com.

Transcripts available upon request: https://loveandabuse.com/contact/

Love and Abuse Paul Colaianni

    • Health & Fitness
    • 4.6 • 40 Ratings

Helping you identify toxic communication, emotional abuse, manipulation, and other forms of bad behavior in relationships. Love and Abuse gives you the perspective of both the victim and the perpetrator. Full of tips and advice for your friendships, family, love life, and marriage.

You'll learn about covert abusive communication that takes away your power. And you'll discover how to pinpoint the specific toxic behaviors, such as narcissistic abuse and verbal abuse, before you are dragged into a game so deep you come out a shell of your former self.

Love and Abuse is the official podcast of The M.E.A.N. Workbook, an assessment and healing guide to help you evaluate the emotionally abusive and manipulative patterns in your relationship. Get the guide that will tell you exactly what's happening in your relationship over at loveandabuse.com.

Transcripts available upon request: https://loveandabuse.com/contact/

    Time with yourself is not only necessary, its required

    Time with yourself is not only necessary, its required

    You give, you adapt, and you change who you are almost to your very core... to what end? When you are overly compassionate to others, you might actually be taking away from yourself. This is as harmful to your mind as a lack of sleep is to your body. 

    • 28 min
    Emotionally abusive behavior is also physically painful

    Emotionally abusive behavior is also physically painful

    Victims of emotional abuse can experience physical pain from all the trauma, potentially leading to increased tolerance and resilience of harm. They can gradually lose their identity due to the abuser’s actions, becoming a shell of their former selves. 

    • 19 min
    When the good you do for them leads nowhere

    When the good you do for them leads nowhere

    Some emotionally abusive people don't change, no matter how much the victim of their hurtful behavior changes for them. Is there ever a point where they will be the person you want them to be? Or does anything you do really matter at all? 

    • 22 min
    A clever manipulation tactic that makes you believe you are the problem

    A clever manipulation tactic that makes you believe you are the problem

    There's a clever manipulation that can happen in some emotionally abusive relationships. It starts with superficial kindness and vague promises and leads to blameshifting and avoiding true accountability. This very subtle form of gaslighting will drive you crazy. I'll share with you how to spot it. 

    • 23 min
    When you think you're strong enough to get back into the difficult relationship

    When you think you're strong enough to get back into the difficult relationship

    When you reach your breaking point with someone, you might make the decision to leave. During that time, you can regain your confidence and feel your power again. You might even decide to give the relationship a second chance, knowing that if you see any warning signs, you can address them right away. 
    That is until you are once again coerced into staying in a situation that seems destined to go down the exact same path as before. Now what?  

    • 28 min
    How emotional abuse can enter your life like an infection

    How emotional abuse can enter your life like an infection

    Sometimes, you can't see the red flags before you're hurt. Emotional abuse can be like an infection that enters your body. You may not know it's there until a lot of time has passed, and you've invested a lot into the relationship.
    In this episode, I share how emotional abuse acts like an infection entering your body and mind and help you understand the environment in which such an emotional infection thrives. 

    • 25 min

Customer Reviews

4.6 out of 5
40 Ratings

40 Ratings

nuggabug ,

For those who need sound advice

I have been listening to Paul for a while now. I am in an abusive relationship and His own personal experience provides some very sound advice or a point of view from someone who WAS an abuser. I highly HIGHLY recommend listening to his podcast. I am so grateful to have come across his podcast by chance.

Retro_DJ ,

Thankyou!

Highly recommend Paul, and all his podcasts, to anyone who is looking for answers or seeking advice/confirmation.
For the first time in my life, I have started to fight back. Thanks to Paul and Love & Abuse, I know that I am not going crazy and I am determined to now regain control of what I have lost through the course of my current relationship; me. 😊

Tanjetcat ,

Thanks very much!

Thank you for this awesome podcast. Just as informative as The Overwhelmed Brain. I have learnt so much about how I’ve changed from the bubbly, confident, happy person I was to the vulnerable, doubtful person I’ve become. I will continue to fight and get back to being my authentic self. Bless you 😘

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