Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic Eileen Kennedy-Moore, PhD

Ep. 62 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: How to forgive friends who have hurt us.
When a friend says or does something that hurts us, it’s easy to get stuck in self-righteous bitterness and resentment. But for our own sake, as much as theirs, we need to find ways to forgive them and move past those unavoidable friendship rough spots.
Scroll down for discussion questions.
Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?
SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)
For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/
Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.
Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.
*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
Think of a time when you’ve forgiven someone for doing something that hurt or upset you. What happened? Why did you decide to forgive them?
Dr. Friendtastic said, “Holding onto bitterness and resentment hurts us more than anyone else.” What does that mean?
How is forgiving someone different than letting someone be mean to you? (Hint: It has to do with how you think about them and what you say to them.)
One of the forgiveness guidelines Dr. Friendtastic mentioned is: If it happened more than a month ago, definitely let it go! Do you agree with that guideline? Why or why not? 
Why is it sometimes easier to forgive other people than to forgive ourselves?
*** You might also like these podcast episodes:
Ep. 59 - Jessie, Age 13: Get rid of toxic friends? https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep59-jessie-age-13
Ep. 43 - Beatrix, Age 8: Friend cut her hair! https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/publish/podcasting/drfriendtastic
Ep. 14 - Rowan, Age 12: Feeling guilty, wanting to make up with a friend https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-14-rowan


Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe

Ep. 61 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Dealing with being excluded.
Brothers and sisters can be a lot of fun, but sometimes they’re hard to live with. Lucy wants to know how to fight less with your brother.
Scroll down for discussion questions.
Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?
SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)
For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/
Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.
Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.
*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
- Why do you think it’s sometimes harder for kids to get along with a sibling than a friend?
- When a kid does something that annoys us, it’s tempting to do the same thing–or something worse–right back to them. Why is this usually not a good idea? (HINT: Why do both kids lose in a “contest” of who can be meanest?)
- Dr. Friendtastic said “If you’ve asked a sibling [or other kid] to stop two times, and they haven’t listened, they’re probably not going to listen,” so your goal should shift “to taking care of yourself.” How could you do that?
- Do you think it’s easiest to be an only child, an oldest sibling, a youngest sibling, or a middle sibling? Why?
*** You might also like these podcast episodes:
Ep. 30 - Michael, Age 10: Why do some kids push others around?
https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-30-michael
Ep. 31 - Mila, Age 10: When someone tries to be annoying
https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-31-mila
Ep. 40 - Vihan, Age 6: Friendly brother also acts wild
https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/vihaan-age-6-friendly-brother-acts-wild


Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe

Ep. 60 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Dealing with being excluded.
What should Henry do when a kid invites his friends to play but not him?
Scroll down for discussion questions.
Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?
SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)
For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/
Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.
Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.
*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
- Why do you think kids sometimes exclude other kids?
- Have you ever felt excluded? What happened? How did you respond?
- Why is it not a good idea to beg or bribe another kid to include you?
- What do you think of the rule “You can’t say someone can’t play”? Are there any situations where it’s OK to exclude someone? What could you do if someone was wrecking the game, being too rough, or refusing to follow the rules? How could you handle it if lots of kids wanted to play a game that’s only for a few people?
- Being “the boss” can be fun and exciting. What could someone do to be a “good boss” or a true leader? (Hint: What could a leader do or not do to make the people who are getting directions feel good?)
*** You might also like these podcast episodes:
Ep. 4 - Thomas, Age 13: One friend feels left out
Ep. 8 - Blake, Age 11: Excluded by friends
Ep. 39 - Maya, Age 8: Replaced by a friend’s new friend


Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe

Ep. 59 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Dumping a friend or working things out by changing the dance.
Jessie wants to get out of some painful relationships.
Scroll down for discussion questions.
Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?
SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)
For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/
Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.
Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.
*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
- Have you ever wanted to end a friendship? What happened?
- In your own words, how would you explain this comment from Dr. Friendtastic? “I don’t believe people can be poison [toxic]. What I do believe is that sometimes people get into patterns of interacting that are hurtful for one or both of them.”
- How is a friendship like an old-fashioned dance, where people hold onto each other? What are some ways you could change a friendship dance if you didn’t like what was happening?
- Why is it not a good idea to suddenly stop talking to a friend, with no explanation?


Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe

Ep. 58 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Safety first
Keara wonders what to do to keep a friend safe.
Scroll down for discussion questions.
Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)
For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/
Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.
Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.
*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
- Have you ever been in a situation where you thought a friend was in danger? What happened? How did you handle it?
- What are some reasons why kids sometimes do things that are unsafe?
- Safety is important, but sometimes kids can be too careful, meaning they don’t want to do things if there’s even a tiny possibility of danger or discomfort. What do you think would be an example of being too careful? How could being too careful be a problem?
- Dr. Friendtastic says, “Preventing dangerous situations is usually easier than dealing with them after they’ve happened.” Do you agree? Why or why not?
- Why might standing near a teacher or a group of friends be useful for preventing problems with someone who is acting too rough?


Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe

Ep. 57 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: The upside of disagreements.
Zen wants to know how to avoid conflicts, but what if conflicts are sometimes helpful?
Scroll down for discussion questions.
Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit. (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)
For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/
Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.
Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.
*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
- Describe a conflict you had with a friend. What happened? What was your friend’s point of view and what was yours? How did the conflict affect your friendship?
- Dr. Friendtastic says that conflict can be a way for friends to learn about each other. What does that mean?
- When might it be a good idea to give in and do what your friend wants, even though it isn’t exactly what you want? When is it NOT a good idea to do this?
- Why is it important to try to understand what a friend is thinking or feeling? (Hint: What could happen if we just insist on what we want?)
- What are some things you can do or not do to make conflicts with a friend less painful?


Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe