Capricorn Stoner Astrological Horoscope

Stoner Capricorn, as the temperature heats up and Summer finally gets into full swing, your cannabis companions are going to need you to keep your cool. The month ahead promises to bring you and your fellow tokin’ terrestrial astronauts on one wild ride. But, amidst the epic highs and unavoidable lows, you will be called upon to be a grounding, peaceful presence.



Throughout the month, new acquaintances and age-old canna-buddies alike will be drawn to your kindness and dank buds. Stoner Capricorn, whether they are in need of a few encouraging words of wisdom to help them get through a tough time, or they simply want to share a celebratory bowl when they are on the come up; your partners-in-chronic know that they can count on your door to be open and your stash jars to be full of the frostiest nugs.





But, my stoner Sea-Goat, while your place might be a pitstop for the other signs in the stoner Zodiac to take a break and a bong rip, don’t forget that you have your own adventuring to do. You have your own trails to blaze!



In order to maintain momentum throughout all of June, it will be a good idea to stick to Hybrid strains for the month. You want to be flying high enough to soak up the Sun’s stimulating rays, but still grounded enough to channel the energy into forward, positive progress.



Whether it’s a weekend getaway or a smokey summer vacation, pack your bags stoner Capricorn!  Grab the ganja and hit the open road. As long as you are smoking good green and are traveling with good people, where you go doesn’t matter.

Stoner Capricorn, you can expect your May to be filled with peaceful days of puffing your favorite buds with your favorite people. While the cosmos does not have any cataclysmic events in store for you this month, it is the overflow from the dramatics of the smoke circle that you will have to watch out for.



Other star signs in the stoner Zodiac may find themselves a little more on edge as some planets cast shadows of illusion, and create tensions where normally there wouldn’t be. Stoner Capricorn, while you may not be able to avoid encountering those who are having a rougher month than you, you can control how much you are affected by their negative vibrations.





My stoner Sea-Goat, while shying away, and avoiding all social interactions is one way to protect your own spritely spirits from being brought down, it is not the most advisable.



The best way to keep your own mood elevated, and your optimistic attitude flying high is by sticking to a consistent, smoke-filled regiment of selfcare. Afterall, a little medicated meditation can work wonders. 



Don’t be afraid to dip out to sneak-a-toke if you are feeling a little overwhelmed by the stuff happening to your fellow tokin’ terrestrial astronauts. Afterall, with everything going on in their own orbit, they may not even notice you left.



Stoner Capricorn, I am not saying you have to pass on all the social smoke sessions. But it may be a good idea to keep your smoke circle limited to invite only. 



There are few situations when tensions flare between best buds that the peace pipe can’t help calm. But a bunch of stoney strangers is a different story. So my indulgent Sea-Goat, as long as you know the people you’re sharing your pipe with, you will spend the month of May in good company:  Making great memories smoking the finest greens.

Stoner Capricorn of all the stoner Zodiac, you’ve had one of the most clouded and challenging beginnings to your year. I say ‘beginning’, but you are well aware that it’s been three rough and wild months of doing your best to navigate your way through the cosmic chaos.



Well, there is finally some good news my ambitious stoner Sea-Goat. Regardless of whether or not it’s written in the stars, you will be surrounded by more than just the sweet scent of sinsemilla.  This month, change is in the air!



And even better, the form this change takes will be manifested by you.  You are in control!





Be sure to toke before you take action stoner Capricorn. Spend the first days of April in deep thought with some healing, yet heady herbs. But be mindful that these earliest smoke sessions should be all about meaningful meditation. 



The goal of this time spent with cannabis is about cultivating clarity of third-eye sight, and clearing the mind of distraction. You don’t want to spend hours spaced out, lost in thought, only to find yourself more clouded than when you started.



Don’t worry stoner Capricorn, you won’t have to face this transition from chaos to tranquility all by yourself. With the New Moon happening on the dawn of the month, you will have a tangible turning point to mark the end of the tumultuous months.  There is a clear celestial line to begin your new journey along a more positive path.



Stoner Capricorn this hard-earned peace is something to commemorate. By the end of the month your smoke sessions will turn away from contemplation, and take on a more celebratory tone. Invite your partners-in-chronic to share in your good fortune and good ganja; because from here on out stoner Capricorn, life is only going to be top shelf for you!

It's over stoner Capricorn!  All the swag analogies and bunk bud predictions of continued struggles are done!  March represents a rebirth for the stoner Sea-Goat.  Now, you can truly start to climb the cliffs of progress.



Early in the month around the time of the New Moon on the 2nd, toke time with your sacred herbal guide.  Sink deep into a medicated meditative state.  Use this solo adventure with cannabis as a sort of internal house cleaning.  Flush out the struggles of the past, and open the pathways for progress in the future.





Use this solo deep dive with the sacred herb as a way to set the stage for positivity in March.  The cosmic influence is changing.  Prepare yourself for brighter days so that when the transition occurs, you will be eager to seize the day instead of confused by the circumstances.



With the deep cleansing solo dive out of the way, stock the stash jars with light and airy Sativa cannabis strains.  The cannabis experience for the remainder of the month should invoke creativity and flexibility more so than a contemplative medicated state.  The flexibility found within a light regiment with the sacred herb will allow balance within this positive transition.



Cleanse the spirit.  Heal the body.  Reset the mind.  Everything that follows will be connected to your true internal drives.  Everything will be possible once again stoner Capricorn.

Stoner Capricorn, if 2021 was a bag of buds, it would have been shwag at best. And while you may have thought that the New Year was going to be more like top shelf, grade-A green, you seem to still find yourself picking through the stems and seeds of life.



But what do you do when you aren’t able to get ahold of better-quality buds? You upgrade your smoking utensils, of course! And if you want to make the most of the bag you’re dealt this month, then this is exactly the approach you will need to take. 





Unfortunately, stoner Capricorn, I can’t say that February will be any more predictable or promising. But I can say that how you approach the highs and lows during this period, and the tools you employ to rise above the uncertain times ahead, IS, within your control. And, although you can’t always change the situation you're in, you can work to change your perspective.



The good news is my chronic-loving Capricorn, you do not have to undertake these mind-expanding exercises on your own. Fortunately, the sacred herb is more than just a magical plant that makes you giggle or gives you the munchies. Its healing vapors will also help you to introspect, reflect, and recalibrate how you respond to the challenges you face.



Stoner Capricorn, when the roads ahead are hazy and it’s hard to see, sometimes you just need to get to an elevated vantage point. So, this month, allow the sacred herb to lift your spirits and line of sight above and out of the fray.



Just remember to keep your expectations realistic stoner Capricorn. Expecting that the sky will be the limit may not be the most practical during this time, but it’s always a good idea to aim a little higher!

For most signs in the stoner Zodiac, New Year’s festivities mark the end of the celebratory holiday season. But for the stoner Capricorn, the party is just getting started! This month, it’s time to light up, breathe in the soothing vapors of the sacred herb, and let go of your inhibitions with every exhalation. 



You are still the same hardworking, ambitious, and persistent ganja-loving Sea-Goat, but January will be a season when you have full license to embrace and explore your more lighthearted side. 





Doing your job well, and advancing in your career, is still an important investment; but you will see the most notable growth in the spiritual and social spheres of life.



Take full advantage this month of any opportunity that arises for you to puff and philosophize with your partners-in-chronic.  Don’t pass on the chance to spend time talking and toking with your fellow terrestrial astronauts. Afterall, what better way to let loose at the end of a busy day than to relax and match bowls with your best buds.



Stoner Capricorn, you shouldn’t be surprised when you see your smoke circle expand in the second Winter month. In fact, your fun-loving, free spirit approach to life right now will be hard to resist!  The only thing you have to worry about is that your pieces are clean, and your stash jars are kept full. 



When you can, plan ahead and put some thought into your social smoke sessions. Perhaps a POT-luck is in order?  Everyone can bring their favorite stoney snack and sacred strain.  By the end of the ganja-gathering, everything should be consumed. Or, you can make a day of it by indulging in some extra strength edibles, and embarking on a 420 movie marathon.



Regardless of what weather Winter might bring, you can breathe easy with the knowledge that the cosmos has nothing but positive vibes and good times in store for you. But it will be up to you to keep the ganja burning and party grooving stoner Capricorn.