104 episodes

Parent with confidence. Lead with grace.

Connected Families Podcast Connected Families

    • Kids & Family
    • 4.7 • 11 Ratings

Parent with confidence. Lead with grace.

    Should Dads Demand Respect?

    Should Dads Demand Respect?

    Should dads demand respect?

    Maybe this sounds familiar:

    “No, I don’t want to!” “This is dumb, you’re unfair!” “Who cares if my homework isn’t done?!” 

    Hey dads, have you experienced this kind of pushback from your kids? It can push ALL your buttons when your child is disrespectful. This can make it especially hard to keep calm and respond with calm authority.

    Although this is a struggle for almost all parents, it seems to be an especially challenging scenario for dads.  

    When our “respect buttons” get pushed, it’s tempting to grasp for control and command obedience. But in doing so, we might find ourselves sacrificing connection and true, heartfelt respect with our kids. You want to build connection and respect. So what can you do? How can you respond?

    In today’s episode, Jim Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Parent Coach) have a heartfelt conversation about respect. When we engage with our kids in humility and curiosity instead of control, we model what respect looks like, and safely earn their respect and trust. Treating our children with respect helps us diffuse a tense situation, and paves the way for connection, conversation, and understanding.

    In this podcast, you’ll learn:

    * how you can initiate and model respect to your child–even when they are being disrespectful to you* ways you can unintentionally frustrate or exasperate your kids, and how to encourage your child towards true heart change–not just compliance * practical ways to teach respect both in and outside of the moment or situation* the importance of asking foundational questions such as: “What’s going on in me as a parent?” “What lessons are my kids really learning by my actions?”

    If you’ve struggled with teaching your child to be respectful we hope you’ve found practical wisdom in this podcast to guide you and your family in God’s grace and truth. Please check out our resources, and as always, your questions and thoughts are important to us. We would love to connect with you!

    Mentioned in this podcast:

    * Ephesians 6:1-4* Connected Families Framework* Donate to Connected Families* Sibling Conflict online course* Wycliffe Hawai‘i Pidgin Bible translation

    In our online course Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding we teach parents how to teach kids The Peace Process. This process equips kids to work through their own arguments without your constant supervision and refereeing. Through July 15th, 2022, we have a special Name Your Own Price campaign. We typically offer our a href="https://connectedfamilies.org/courses/sibling-conflict/" target="_blank" rel="noref...

    • 33 min
    How to Be a More Playful Parent

    How to Be a More Playful Parent

    Sometimes parenting can feel like one big list of things you have to get done. It can be so hard to switch gears from the many demands of being a parent to having joyful and playful time with your kiddos!

    Yet research shows that playfulness brings connection and communicates in a language that helps kids learn! Playful parenting is an important part of every level of the Connected Families Framework.

    Intentional parent/child play can:

    * calm your child’s brain and yours* provide opportunities to teach skills* enable problem-solving capability* reach kids who are struggling * communicate to your child, “I enjoy you!”

    Sounds great, right? So how do we get there?

    In this podcast Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families, Occupational Therapist) and Joy Wendling (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) to discuss the vital role that play contributes to a connected relationship between you and your kids. Tune in as they talk about how you can invite your kids to cooperate through play, and keep the long term goal of connection, while also teaching important skills for the moment.

    From both a scientific and a biblical standpoint, play is a vital part of speaking your child’s language. It is a pivotal way kids learn! The language of play creates an atmosphere of emotional safety where you can diffuse conflict and invite joy and connection.

    In this podcast, you’ll learn:

    * what the Bible says about play–it might surprise you!* the brain science of why playful parenting creates connection and invites cooperation* practical ways to make it happen in everyday routines (like trying to get your kids out the door!)* how to tune into your family’s unique personalities to discover what playful connection looks like 

    Has this podcast been helpful to you? If so, could you please rate and review so others can find us more easily? We want to share the message of hope and connection with as many parents as possible! 

    Mentioned in this podcast:

    * Joy Wendling: Created to Play* Connected Families Framework* Sibling Conflict online course* The “Just Right Challenge”* Bible verses: Ecclesiastes 11:8, Matthew 19:14, 2 Samuel 6, Zephaniah 3:17, John 15:15b...

    • 43 min
    Does Attachment Style Matter?

    Does Attachment Style Matter?

    Your relationship with your child might feel “off” but you’re not sure why. Could it be that the way you were parented impacts the way you parent? Your attachment style affects all your most important relationships – from spouse to children to close friends.

    So, what is “attachment style” anyway? And does attachment style really matter?

    Attachment tends to be a buzz word in parenting circles. Not to be confused with Attachment Parenting, Attachment Theory comes from scientific research about different ways that children securely bond (or lack bonding) with their parents in the child’s early years. 

    In a perfect world, a child experiences secure attachment when the parent-child relationship is built around emotional safety and stability from the parent. 

    But we don’t live in a perfect world. 

    Sometimes we (and our children) do not experience this kind of secure attachment. When we explore our family of origin, we learn how our own style of attachment affects how we respond in relationships and it definitely affects how we parent our children! 

    On today’s episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Jim Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) as they welcome guests Milan and Kay Yerkovich. Together, they dive into the significance of, and styles of, attachment and how we model them in our parenting. They are the authors of How We Love, and they discuss how we bring the attachment style from our parents to our own relationships, especially to our kids.  

    Learning about your attachment style is a key component of the first level of the Connected Families Framework and can help you understand, “What’s going on in me?”. Parents who have not experienced secure connection — don’t lose hope! The good news is that attachment wounds from your past can be identified, and you can grow along with your kids. You can cultivate a secure, deep connection to your kids and transform your family for generations to come. 

    In this podcast, you’ll discover:

    * the six attachment styles and how you can identify your own attachment style* how your attachment style passes on to your kids, and affects emotional regulation, sense of safety, and predictability in your home* the specific challenges of cultivating a secure attachment with kids who have experienced trauma, particularly kids who join your family through foster care or adoption* the importance of understanding your own attachment history without shame, and adopting a growth mindset to change the trajectory of your family’s legacy

    We are so glad you’re here! Has this podcast been helpful? Could you please take a moment to rate and review this podcast, so others can find us more easily?

    • 46 min
    Ending the Shame Cycle

    Ending the Shame Cycle

    Are you hard on yourself as a parent? As a person? It’s so easy to get caught up in what feels like failure to us. We want so much to be good parents! Though it’s unintentional, we can project our own feelings of shame onto our kids. Then we feel even worse. Shame can be so destructive to us and to our relationships. What does ending the shame cycle look like?

    If you have ever felt stuck in this kind of a cycle, please listen to this podcast. In this milestone podcast (our 100th episode!) we talk about a prevalent and powerful concept that has resounded with our Connected Families community for nearly 20 years: Moving forward from shame to the freedom of living in God’s grace and truth.

    In this episode, Stacy Bellward is joined by Connected Families Co-Founders, Jim and Lynne Jackson.  Together, they share the message that has transformed the lives of thousands of parents and families, and has provided the foundation for an enduring parenting framework. Modeling God’s grace and truth to our kids communicates that we are human, and that when we mess up there’s an opportunity to bring God’s very real mercy into any situation. 

    In this podcast:

    Listen in today to learn about how to embrace and incorporate truth phrases into the messiness of daily life. Phrases such as:

    * “This is a moment for compassion for me, and for my kids.”* “Jesus gives me courage to face adversity and I will grow from this!”* “Everyone is still learning.”* “I can respond without ‘freaking out’.”* “Hope is the fuel for a growth mindset.”

    Was there an encouraging statement in this podcast that resonated with you? Do you have your own hopeful-truth statement that has helped you? We’d love to hear it! Post it on your social media and tag us! FB: @ConnectedFamilies Insta: @connectedfams  You will encourage other parents too! 

    Mentioned in this podcast:

    * Grace and Truth for Moms online course* Connected Families Framework* Bible verses: Psalm 3:3, 2 Corinthians 10:5, Ephesians 1,2, Romans 15:13, Philippians 4:8, 2 Peter 1:3

    .stk-d466284{background-color:var(--paletteColor4,#1e3f52) !important}.stk-d466284:before{background-color:var(--paletteColor4,#1e3f52) !important}Want a handy list of Truth Phrases to hang onto when life gets messy? Click HERE for a downl...

    • 38 min
    How Can I Identify Anxiety in My Child?

    How Can I Identify Anxiety in My Child?

    Do you have a child who struggles with anxiety? It can be really hard to know how to help them! Anxiety can be a powerless feeling for both kids and adults. Kids especially do not have all the same tools or brain development as adults to know how to manage it well. They need help.

    Add to this challenge that sometimes anxiety doesn’t even look like anxiety. Anxiety can be masked by a variety of emotions and behaviors. It can even present itself as defiance! What do you do then? As a parent, your heart is for your child. They need your help and you want to help, but what can you do? Listen in, because this episode has insight and helpful tools you can use today.

    Today’s episode is the second part in a two-part series about identifying and navigating anxiety. Last week we discussed how to identify anxiety in us as parents. (If you missed it, listen here!) Today we are diving into how to help our kids with their anxiety. Stacy Bellward is again joined by three experienced Connected Families Parent Coaches, Katie Wetsell, Marni Love, and Taylor Irby. Together they talk about the science of anxiety, how to distinguish it from other emotions, and how you can support your child through their anxious feelings. 

    As adults, we can be advocates and coaches for anxious children whether in our home, school, church, or the community around us.  We can get curious about what is going on in kids to determine if they are experiencing anxiety, and come alongside them with empathy, compassion, and helpful tools that bring connection.

    In today’s podcast, you’ll discover:

    * insights to help you discern between your child’s anxiety, defiance, and other difficult emotions* practical ways you can partner with (coach) your kids to bring lasting transformation from a place of safety and connection* a tool called OARS to help you communicate using empathy and support * the importance of your own foundational work as a parent to avoid bringing your own anxiety into tense situations

    We are so glad you’re here! Has this podcast been helpful? Could you please take a moment to rate and review this podcast, so others can find us more easily? Simply click on this link, and click “Listen on Apple Podcasts,” then click on “Ratings and Reviews” in the itunes pop-up. Or, use your Apple Podcast app on your phone! We love to bring you practical insights and biblical wisdom to help you in your parenting journey. Let us know how we can help!

    Resources mentioned in this podcast:

    * Connected Families Framework* Grace and Truth for Moms online course* Window of Tolerance: Dr Dan Siegel* 4 Steps to ...

    • 34 min
    Can I Parent Well When I'm Anxious?

    Can I Parent Well When I'm Anxious?

    You can feel the rising tension in your shoulders and the knots in your stomach again. So much going on around you, and inside you. There is no shortage of things to feel anxious about in our world right now! Current data reveals a huge spike in anxiety in recent years, for both parents and kids. We all face anxiety at some point and it can cause a range of emotions, from mild frustration to feeling really helpless. But can you parent well when you’re anxious?

    Anxiety can show up in big ways in our lives and in our family, but it can also show up in subtle ways that are masked by other emotions and behaviors. This is why it is SO important to routinely pay attention to the most foundational question, “What is going on in ME?”

    Today’s podcast episode is absolutely packed with thoughtful and real-life guidance for how we can understand and navigate parental anxiety. Stacy Bellward (podcast host) invites three Connected Families Parent Coaches to an honest and insightful conversation of how they have encountered and managed anxiety in many different forms and situations in their own lives and in their kids’ lives as well:

    * Marni Love, a homeschool mom of three boys and regular guest in our Clubhouse Community. Marni has experience with adoption, ADHD, sensory processing, primitive reflex integration and highly sensitive children* Taylor Irby, a speaker, marriage and parenting coach, and mom of five children. Taylor is familiar with the challenges of ADHD, autism, anxiety, developmental delays and adoption trauma* Katie Wetsell, a mom of four kids and a pediatric nurse who has personally navigated issues related to adoption, mental illness, and learning disabilities. Katie is also certified in SPACE Treatment, a parent-based approach for helping children with anxiety, anxiety disorders, and OCD

    Join these fellow moms and learn how anxiety can actually be an opportunity to grow in our faith, to better understand ourselves and our kids, and to love each other well as a family. We can be proactive in taking care of ourselves and staying grounded in God’s grace and truth so that we can flourish as God’ dearly beloved children.

    What you’ll discover in today’s podcast:

    * how anxiety might show up in your home masked as different emotions, behavior, and actions * a clinical definition of anxiety, and how it functions to alert us in both healthy and unhealthy ways* the difference between anxiety and fear, and how we can discern and respond * practical strategies and important truths to help you work through anxious feelings

    Do you or your kids struggle with anxiety? Is there something in today’s podcast you found helpful? We would really love to hear from you and to help you navigate these challenges. We invite you to check out the valuable resources on our website, and share them with a friend who needs them too!

    Mentioned in this podcast:

    * Bible verses: Psalm...

    • 38 min

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5
11 Ratings

11 Ratings

Dominoemad ,

The framework used surpasses my DBT parenting lessons

I took DBT parenting lessons, which were so helpful, and I highly recommend them to ALL parents. And then I took the course about the framework this podcast is based on. It blew my mind how simply clear and effective it was. I’d say both are effective, but the framework on which this podcast is based has more authentically changed me on the inside, by God’s grace, and that makes it so much easier for me to apply their advice and to remember and apply the DBT techniques that I learned. Thank you!!

Cheryldietsdontwork ,

Worth the listen

As a social worker I really enjoy the research based methods and that it also has the biblical framework to trust.

huntfamilycan ,


Seriously love this podcast and the advise they give. Just helped so much with getting our toddler to eat her dinner rather than the epic power struggle. I love all the episodes I have heard. Thank you so much for putting the shows together!

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