100 episodes

From navigating dating apps to overcoming the friendzone to seeking a soulmate, this ain’t your momma’s love advice! Hosted by the Official Love Expert of The Drew Barrymore Show and LA Times advice columnist, Damona Hoffman, Dates & Mates is jam-packed with interviews from your favorites celebs, authors, and experts.
Dates & Mates is the 2022 Winner of The Best Podcast of the Year at The Black Podcasting Awards, #1 ranked love and relationship podcast by Cosmopolitan Magazine and a Top 10 Pick by HuffPost in the love category.

Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman Damona Hoffman - Dates and Mates Media

    • Society & Culture
    • 4.9 • 22 Ratings

From navigating dating apps to overcoming the friendzone to seeking a soulmate, this ain’t your momma’s love advice! Hosted by the Official Love Expert of The Drew Barrymore Show and LA Times advice columnist, Damona Hoffman, Dates & Mates is jam-packed with interviews from your favorites celebs, authors, and experts.
Dates & Mates is the 2022 Winner of The Best Podcast of the Year at The Black Podcasting Awards, #1 ranked love and relationship podcast by Cosmopolitan Magazine and a Top 10 Pick by HuffPost in the love category.

    First Dates & Old Flames

    First Dates & Old Flames

    Mat Boggs, YouTube dating coach, sets you up for your best first date yet as he covers everything from red flags and conversation topics to knowing how much time to invest in a match.
    The Dating Dish story this week comes from Mashable:

    Dating Culture Has Become Selfish. How Do We Fix It?

    Then our Dear Damona question this week is:
    An old flame invited me to their big birthday bash in Cabo. Should I go?

    Follow Mat on Youtube @MatBoggs and check out his MANifest Your Man Program by visiting: https://www.bravethinkinginstitute.com/love-relationships/resources/mym/offer/strategy-session

    Read the Mashable story at: mashable.com/article/selfish-dating-app-culture

    Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.

    TIMESTAMPS

    (00:00:12) First dates: The gateway to new possibilities 
    (00:01:57) Dating culture: A selfish era 
    (00:04:35) The capitalist mindset and dating
    (00:08:45)  Rethinking the approach to dating
    (00:10:22) Do's and don'ts of first dates
    (00:17:47) Red Flags in Dating 
    (00:18:38) Internal Repetitive Energy 
    (00:19:35) Internal GPS System 
    (00:21:28) Manipulative Behaviors
    (00:23:04) Vibration for Long-Lasting Love 
    (00:24:35) Compatibility of Interests 
    (00:25:42) Mindset and Deal Breakers 
    (00:26:37) Mindset for Online Dating 
    (00:29:50) Intentional Action in Dating
    (00:30:51) Sharing on First Dates 
    (00:33:30) Whose hands are you going to put this baby into?
    (00:35:33)Shifting the conversation 
    (00:36:33) Mel's authentic approach
    (00:43:46) Dear Damona - Tracy's dilemma 
    (00:45:17) Damona's advice to Tracy 
    (00:49:06) Happy Birthday and Letting Go 
    (00:50:17) Lily Womble Up Next

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    • 53 min
    365 Love Practices & AI Dating Concierge

    365 Love Practices & AI Dating Concierge

    Dr. Alexandra Solomon, couples therapist and author, lays a foundational framework to deepen connection and self-understanding in her new book “Love Every Day: 365 Relational Self-Awareness Practices to Help Your Relationship Heal, Grow and Thrive.” In this episode, she will share specific exercises and prompts to get you thinking about love differently.

    The Dating Dish story this week comes to you from NBC News:

    Could an AI Dating Concierge fix your dating life?

    Then our Dear Damona question this week is:

    Is it a red flag if my match doesn’t ask me questions about myself?


    LIVE ONLINE EVENT: Damona is hosting a one night only, live workshop talking about how to meet your matches online and off on Tuesday, May 29th. Last chance to enroll in the Dating Decoded workshop at DamonaHoffman.com/workshop

    Follow Dr. Alexandra on Instagram @Dr.Alexandra.Solomon and grab a copy of her new book, “Love Every Day: 365 Relational Self-Awareness Practices to Help Your Relationship heal, Grow and Thrive”

    Read the NBC News story at: https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/internet/ai-personas-are-future-dating-bumble-founder-says-many-arent-buying-rcna151738

    Get it off your chest, with BetterHelp.Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 1 hr 1 min
    Take Back Your Brain & The Texting Trap

    Take Back Your Brain & The Texting Trap

    Kara Loewentheil, Master Certified Life Coach, applies an analytical, feminist lens towards understanding our current dating culture and how our old stories may be affecting our decisions in love.

    The Dating Dish story this week is based on a national study conducted by Whirlpool:

    Spring Clean Your Dating Profile: A Surprising Social Experiment Uncovers What Singles Prioritize Most 

    Then our Dear Damona question this week is:

    How can I get more messages from my matches?

    LIVE ONLINE EVENT: Damona is hosting a one night only, live workshop talking about how to meet your matches online and off. Sign up for the Dating Decoded workshop at DamonaHoffman.com/workshop

    Follow Kara on Instagram @KaraLoewentheil and be sure to grab a copy of her new book, “Take Back Your Brain: How A Sexist Society Gets In Your Head and How To Get It Out.”

    Read about the Whirpool survey at: prnewswire.com/news-releases/spring-clean-your-dating-profile-whirlpool-brand-uncovers-what-singles-prioritize-most-in-a-potential-partner-302077664.html
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 54 min
    Mind Your Manners & Bumble Bummer

    Mind Your Manners & Bumble Bummer

    Sara Jane Ho, etiquette expert and host of Netflix’s Mind Your Manners, joins to share the definitive etiquette rules for dating, talking, and texting inspired by her new book.

    The Dating Dish story this week comes from CNN: 
    Bumble no longer requires women to make the first move! 

    Then our Dear Damona question this week is:
    My match and I are traveling farther than normal to meet. Does that mean our date should last longer?

    ANNOUNCEMENT: For the first time in a long time, Damona and her team are offering 1-on-1 coaching! Apply to become her next success story at DamonaHoffman.com/application

    Follow Sara Jane on Instagram @SaraJaneHo and be sure to grab a copy of her new book, “Mind Your Manners: How to Be Your Best Self in Any Situation”.

    Read the CNN article for yourself: cnn.com/2024/04/30/tech/bumble-relaunch-men-make-first-move/index.html
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 49 min
    Addicted to Drama & I Can Fix Him

    Addicted to Drama & I Can Fix Him

    Dr. Scott Lyons, host of The Gently Used Human podcast, talks about his new book, “Addicted to Drama: Healing Dependency on Crisis & Chaos In Yourself & Others”. This week’s Dating Dish is: HuffPost shares the reasons why we try to “fix” our matches…and what you should probably do instead. Then our Dear Damona question this week is: How can I attract more culturally open matches?

    Follow Scott on Instagram @DrScottLyons and be sure to grab a copy of his book!

    Share the love: Get your copy of Damona’s book  F the Fairy Tale on Amazon too and leave a review and Damona could shout you out on an upcoming episode!

    HuffPost article https://www.huffpost.com/entry/taylor-swift-fix-him-relationships_l_662a5511e4b005d7bf0cbef0


    TIMESTAMPS
    (00:01:36) Why do we try to fix people in our relationships?
    (00:08:09) Introduction of Dr. Scott Lyons
    (00:13:32) Causes of addiction to drama
    (00:17:24) Origin of addiction to drama
    (00:18:09) Ecosystem and Turbulence
    (00:19:27) Numbness and Seeking Sensation
    (00:24:02) Addiction to Drama and Dating Apps
    (00:27:00) Attentional Economy and Social Media
    (00:33:13) Interrupting Peace and News Consumption
    (00:35:26) Dating App Activation and Frameworks
    (00:37:21) Awareness and Reflexive Behavior
    (00:38:01) Avoidance Tactics
    (00:38:24) Escaping Chaos
    (00:39:30) Milestones of Healing
    (00:42:41) Processing Trauma
    (00:43:42) Belonging and Identity
    (00:47:02) Cultural Diversity in Dating

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 56 min
    His Move & Love After 50

    His Move & Love After 50

    In this all-Dear Damona episode, Damona takes on dating burnout and swipe fatigue by answering your questions, like:

    Is it a bad sign if my Bumble match is taking more than 3 days to reply?

    How do I manage expectations with new partners?

    How do I attract partners that are more financially and emotionally stable? 

    And, is it more difficult to find love after 50?


    Share the love: Get your copy of F the Fairy Tale on Amazon today and leave a review and Damona could shout you out on an upcoming episode!

    TIMESTAMPS
    00:00:07 Is it a bad sign if my bumble match is stuck on his move for days?
    00:02:19 How do I manage expectations with new partners? 
    00:17:27 How do I attract partners that are more financially and emotionally stable?
    00:18:30 Dealing with fixer-uppers 
    00:27:50 Is it more difficult to find love after 50?
    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    • 35 min

Customer Reviews

4.9 out of 5
22 Ratings

22 Ratings

Allison.Vunderland ,

Now I’m spoiled!

Started from the bottom now [I’m] here really encapsulates my journey from the highly unscientific field of dating podcasts by people who claim to be professionals and specialists but have nothing to show for that other than drawn out, anecdotal opinions atop their soapbox of perpetual singledom. It’s a bonus that I can get great advice from someone who looks like me, but even if that were not the case, Damona demonstrate with ease why she is a leader in her field. It’s resource rich, concise, funny and quirky while still remaining objectively relatable with useful information that you can implement. Would recommend to all, of any gender, single or otherwise.

Gbean15083 ,

Congrats on your 400th episode!!

Thank you so much Damona for all your advice and wisdom on improving my dating life. It’s always a joy to listen to your podcast and I look forward to it every week!

ReenRups509 ,

I love this show!!!

I listen to this show often! Damona is funny and eloquent and all the things.

She brings on great guests and the advice and convos are so helpful.

Single girls - get on this podcast!! It’s time to LEVEL UP ❤️

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