100 episodes

In this time of lockdown, it’s time to tune in and switch off. 

Let Em Rusciano speak to you in her soothing tones (NB: Not at all soothing) as she shuts out the c-word and thrives in isolation. There’s wine to be drunk! There’s shows to be watched! There’s family fights to be bitterly picked over! Em will bring the quality quarantine as she reminisces about past obsessions with her best friend Michael Lucas, gets positive advice from her life coach husband Scott (good luck Scotty), and socialises with social distance. Shut out the noise of the world, and get down in lockdown with Em.

Emsolation with Em Rusciano Em Rusciano

    • Comedy
    • 5.0 • 13 Ratings

In this time of lockdown, it’s time to tune in and switch off. 

Let Em Rusciano speak to you in her soothing tones (NB: Not at all soothing) as she shuts out the c-word and thrives in isolation. There’s wine to be drunk! There’s shows to be watched! There’s family fights to be bitterly picked over! Em will bring the quality quarantine as she reminisces about past obsessions with her best friend Michael Lucas, gets positive advice from her life coach husband Scott (good luck Scotty), and socialises with social distance. Shut out the noise of the world, and get down in lockdown with Em.

    Busy Mum Blow-out

    Busy Mum Blow-out

    Ever had a moment where you’re about to do something totes important, like say...another episode of your low key, but also hugely successful podcast, and suddenly it’s all CODE RED, you’re panic struck, wondering, am I destroying my fave pink and subtle grey leopard print jeans right now, whilst you casually spit out a rogue Japanese flag reference? Exactly, well maybe not exactly that, but, same feels and you get the picture...and you’ll also get the full lived experience in audio form within this episode as well. Aside from the blow-out, as beautifully articulated in real time by our fearless host Em Rusciano, there’s also Russian hackers to dismiss, the Queensland deputy premier Steven Miles to chat about, he accidentally called Scomo a right royal c-word at the Labour Day March in Brisbane when describing Scotty’s decision to attend the ‘Rockhampton Beef Week Annual Industry Awards’ instead of the rally. Michael has a technical glitch which inspires an impromptu musical performance from Em, then we encounter the red dot special scenario, then it’s back to ‘Beef Week’, there’s a perfectly placed pun, the shock and trauma that comes from agreeing with Andrew Bolt, and the horrific crisis unfolding in India. After that we move onto a Tik Tok post that exposed Ben Affleck’s rejection via the exclusive ‘none of us are invited’ celebrity Tinder app ‘Raya’. Naturally Em wants an invite, but only so she can friend all the celebs real hard, Ben Affleck leads us to J’Lo, which ushers in a chance for Em and Michael to catalogue all of her terrible life choices when it comes to men. We also find time to talk Billie Eilish debuting a brand new look on the cover of British Vogue, which unsurprisingly activates Michael’s Madonna nerd mode plus there’s Em’s cover debut on Stellar Magazine to reflect as well. Finally we tie it all together with a revisit to leak week to discuss how much Em’s vagina is going to come for her for using wads of toilet paper to shore up the blow out. So get ready for more hectic hilarity in your ears as soon as you press play.

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/Emsolation

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    • 41 min
    The Creepy Doll Room

    The Creepy Doll Room

    Did someone say “technical issues”, YES, yes they did, they also said “arggghhh” and “why the fuck isn’t this working” and also “I just wanna come in and it works without all this technical b******t” so after dealing with a spinning wheel of death, a couple of forced quits and 45 minutes worth of various emotions, with added shutting down and signing in again, Michael suggested he jump in his car and drive to Em’s so they could record this show face to face. Once ALL of that was done we FINALLY got an episode happening for you, but boy was it hard fought and mentally exhausting…pretty much. We start with a full rundown of the Oscars, which were a ratings failure, Em and Michael didn’t even watch them, but they’ve both seen enough highlights to have opinions on all of the things, as you’d expect, like Glenn Close being an utter legend, the terrible idea not to have Best Picture as the final award, and Anthony Hopkins doing an acceptance speech the day after the event. Then we side step into all the must see TV series you need to get around, from Disney Plus giving us ‘The Falcon and the Winter Soldier’ to Netflix doing their own version of a Disney animated wonder, with the release of ‘Over the Moon’, there’s also a hectic rundown of the fantasy series ‘Shadow and Bone’, plus Michael wants to give props to Kate Winslet for getting down and dirty and even limping through her role as a detective in her new series ‘Mare of Easttown’. Then Em’s dad Vincie stops by to deliver a bottle of wine, just in time for a full breakdown of Harry Styles new role as a dreamy voiced sleep story host for the app Calm, that then leads Michael to reveal Harry’s new movie role, which inspires Em to suggest the team at 365 Days get their drone up into the stratosphere so they can really get around Harry’s sex scene shoot. We also need to talk Em objectifying Jock from Masterchef on The Project, how she has a rather unique kink for gardening scenarios and then we somehow end up talking through which Disney Princes are worthy of b*****g, so prepare yourself for some animated bestiality, not even kidding. Oh yeah, also ALL of this happened inside the confines of the creepy doll room that Em’s mum has at her house, so expect a view of one such creepy doll on our socials for added visual horror, you might wanna grab a glass of wine for the audio journey too, but see how you go, good luck everyone.

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/Emsolation

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    • 46 min
    Consent Milkshake

    Consent Milkshake

    So you know that idiom about not stirring up a hornet’s nest? Well this episode of Emsolation has so much content that could be reflected by that little saying...and then some. In fact we’re not just stirring it up, we are whacking it with a bat, then kicking it along the ground, maybe setting it on fire, then we are calling in the army to bomb the bejesus out of it too. So grab your beverage of choice, take a deep breath and adopt the pose of a pest controller with their flamethrower set to incinerate, because we got some talking to do. The first thing we wanna add to the extinct list is the Government’s attempt at a consent video using milkshakes and tacos and getting pizza. It was so bad that when we asked the simple question “what do you wanna hear on the pod this week” via the Emsolation Instagram stories (are you following Emsolation on Instagram? You totes should) the replies referred to that bin fire that was the Milkshake consent video soooo much, that it was kind of like the cyber equivalent of one of those Aussie outback mouse plagues, so naturally we will start things off with that. Apologies to anyone who is now creeped out by thoughts of a gazillion mice pouring out of every nook and cranny, let’s move on….or do we not want to move on because we also have to cover off this next item. Em and Michael are also going to gently dip their toes into the Bluey backlash that exploded on Facebook after Em added her thoughts to the “we love Bluey but how good would it be if it was a smidge more inclusive” suggestion. Their toes dip gently as we begin, but by the end they are jumping around in the water and splashing it about and having an awesome time, promise. Finally, even though Em spent the last episode of this podcast talking up how much she wanted to witness the funeral for Prince Phillip, she actually hardly watched any of it. However, as you will bear witness, just because Em didn’t see each and every moment of the Royal funeral, doesn’t mean she isn’t more than capable of filling in the gaps. In fact, she will fill in so many gaps that you would need a microscope to see how fine her gap filling skills are, she even manages to conjure up scenarios you didn’t even think were humanly possible to conjure up. Yes it is true that Em may have had a teensy stroke while navigating all of the scenario conjuring, but it's hilarious nonetheless and well worth the wait, but don’t wait too long, like even this is wasting your time, so stop reading and go listen NOW!

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/Emsolation

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    • 43 min
    BIG NEWS

    BIG NEWS

    It’s announcement time, so we start this episode with Em’s big reveal, you will need to pretend it comes with explosions of glitter, streamers and other gaiety that wasn’t added during recording, mostly because when you unleash stuff like that into a confined space, it makes a huge mess and no one wants to be dealing with that clean up. Then Michael joins Em to demand he’s like Madonna, seems pretty standard by now, we then swiftly move onto the big news of the past week like the death of Prince Phillip. It seems like the announcement of his passing has been endless, so naturally we take time out to cover off all of the things, from Lizzie’s loss after nearly 75 years of having him by her side, which prompts Em to wonder who the Queen’s version of her Michael Lucas is. There’s also the twitter pile and the jokes and memes that followed, the completely understandable reaction Indigenous people had to the news and even the media’s stock pile of pre-prepared tributes to reflect the passing of the famous, which may have inspired Em to think about what hers would look like if she got one. We also couldn’t talk the Royal Family without wondering what Fergie will be doing when it comes time for the funeral, will she even be invited? There’s also a brand new Shero worth celebrating, her name is Christine Holgate and she deserves props after her appearance at a Senate Committee this week where she detailed how she was humiliated and bullied out of her job as the CEO of Australia Post. Again we’re keen to know if she has a Michael Lucas on direct dial for help with her Senate outfit choices, which inspires Em to detail exactly what she would be wearing should she ever be called up for a Christina Holgate style takedown. So grab your headphones or pump up the volly on your speakers and dive in now for a bunch of Royal ranting and endless inspirational outfit ideas for when you have to cancel someone, plus everything else that comes along with an Emsolation podcast episode.

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/Emsolation

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    • 42 min
    White Boy summer?

    White Boy summer?

    Hands up who’s in for a pop culture extravaganza this episode...we’re gonna assume some of you put your hands up, or at least thought to yourself, yep totes in, because Em has been laid up in bed with the tummy wobbles (which is a much more pleasant term for what happens when you have gastro and it’s coming out of you like lava, my words not Em’s) anyway her need to stay close to her bathroom facilities means Em has spent the last few days in front of the internet, so she’s got all of the pop culture things that she needs to talk about. We will begin with an apology, apparently some listeners are willing to actually fact check this show, hence there’s some Britney die hards asking for some recognition on a false fact we made, after that we’ll move straight into Michael’s very first stage show since the relaxing of restrictions and it just so happens it was Frozen the Musical. Naturally Em is mad keen to know if it’s worth dragging Elio along to witness the live version as he is currently deep within a toddler vortex of Frozen appreciation that means he must be given multiple viewings of both movies on repeat, plus all his Frozen branded merchandising within touching distance as well. The dating life of the cast of the Wiggles has also been an online obsession of Em’s and there are new developments worth sharing, which will make you ache for the Wiggles even more than we already do. Plus there’s the news that the break out star and all round hottie from Bridgerton, Regé-Jean Page won’t be returning for Season 2 and finally we need to talk about what is going on with Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson’s son Chet Hanks, he’s an actor and a rapper and he’s got Em and Michael freaking out with his latest efforts online, it’s a LOT to process. So plug in and get your pop culture upload in one glorious glitter filled galavant of podcast listening.

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/Emsolation

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    • 33 min
    Stripper pole to hell

    Stripper pole to hell

    If you’ve been anywhere near Em’s Instagram account in the last week, you will know she jumped on a flight to Sydney with her eldest Chella, popped on a drop dead gorg sequinned ensemble and sashayed her way up the red carpet JUST so she could profess even MORE love for the musical Hamilton. Now that the Aussie version of Hamilton has arrived Down Under, Em can’t wait to give you the lowdown on what it’s like and also how it somehow manages to be uniquely Australian, even though it's a musical about American history. Once they’ve exhausted all their accolades for Hamilton, Em and Michael will swing the doors of their Institut de Musique (totes made that name up but I figure it’s kinda like a virtual music video laboratory, patent pending) anyway name aside, they will swing the doors of their Institut wide open so they can go into extreme forensic detail on the Lil Nas X clip for his new song ‘Montero (Call Me by Your Name)’. If you’re yet to see it, Lil Nas X transports us from the Garden of Eden, to a Colosseum where he’s persecuted and sent to heaven, but before he gets there a pole emerges from below that he then rides all the way to hell, just so he can give the devil a lap dance, seduce and kill him and then take his crown. It’s pretty much a visual extravaganza filled with LGBTQ imagery and themes plus a heap of Greco-Roman and medieval Christian motifs and messages in both Greek and Latin, so together Em and Michael will cover all three acts. Naturally I don’t think I’m revealing any secrets when I say that the stripper pole straight to hell was their favourite part. There will also be time for a brief chat about Britney’s response to the ‘Free Britney’ doco, plus we need to talk about that 3 day lockdown that’s been given to Queenslanders in the lead up to Easter. So find your ideal chill zone, get your headphones or speakers primed and dive into another Emsolation episode stuffed to the brim with all the stuff you never know you needed, but will no doubt be thankful for once you’re done.

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/Emsolation

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    • 44 min

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5
13 Ratings

13 Ratings

Arifairy ,

Half a world away 🥰

Even though I don’t live in Australia (Ontario, Canada) Em and Michael make every topic feel relevant to me. I know nothing about Australian politics but I’m right there with them!! Em is the sister I always wanted and Michael is the the best friend I never knew I needed!!! I hope they keep going even after lock down is over!!!

Lulu234 ,

This podcast gives me life.

10 across the board.

samelaineG ,

Lordy this is great

Seriously brightens the day! This makes being stuck at home so much better because Em tells it how it is and validates all the feelings we’re having during this cray cray time. Thanks for being the hilarious you Em!

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