The Recovery Show » Finding serenity through 12 step recovery in Al-Anon – a podcast The Recovery Show

Al Anon's Tradition 3 emphasizes the gathering of relatives of alcoholics for mutual aid, forming an Al Anon family group rooted in shared experiences and support. Spencer elaborates on how this mutual aid creates a safe space where individuals facing the impact of addiction can find solace and understanding. The only requirement for membership is the presence of alcoholism in a relative or friend, fostering a sense of unity and compassion within the group.







Spencer recounts his journey of seeking support in Al Anon meetings and the transformative power of mutual aid. The feeling of not being alone anymore, the exchange of experiences, and the shared path towards personal growth resonate deeply in his narrative. We find moments of realization, self-discovery, and the bonds formed through mutual aid in the Al Anon community.







One significant aspect of mutual aid within Al Anon is sponsorship, where experienced members mentor others in their recovery journey. Sponsors can provide guidance by asking thought-provoking questions, offering reflections, and empowering individuals to explore their motives and choices. Through sponsorship, mutual aid extends beyond shared experiences to personalized support and guidance tailored to individual needs.







In the tapestry of recovery and personal growth, mutual aid emerges as a force that nurtures resilience, empathy, and self-awareness. Through shared experiences, support without judgment, and a community built on understanding, individuals in Al Anon find strength in unity and healing.







Readings and Links







We read from A Little Time For Myself, an Al-Anon daily reader, p. 73 (March 13).







Judy asked “what do I do when Google Podcasts goes away?” See one person's recommendations for a new app.







Use our Subscribe/Follow page to follow the podcast in your new app. On an Android phone, tap the “Android” button.







Upcoming topics







We will be starting a new series of episodes on the 12 steps. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecovery.show with your questions or experience, strength and hope.















Music from the Show











Bill Withers – Lean on Me











Sia – Breathe Me











Jason Mraz – Song for a Friend

We find value in the shared experiences, wisdom, and support expressed in Al-Anon meetings. Sharing in meetings plays a crucial role in bolstering recovery, assisting in healing, and fostering a sense of community among attendees. However, we may hear instructions and conventions that seem challenging to adhere to at times.







Why do we share?







Sharing in an Al-Anon meeting invokes an atmosphere of sincerity, openness, and compassion. Speakers such as Heather and Spencer cherish the meeting as a platform to express their feelings, share their experiences, invite the shared experience of others, and most importantly, aid their path to recovery. Al-Anon’s third tradition suggests that we “[gather] together for mutual aid,” allowing us to learn from others' experiences.







How do we share?







Heather was challenged by her sponsor to try speaking from the heart during meetings. She was told that she should not aim to present a meticulously crafted speech but rather express her authentic feelings and experiences.







Despite being a vital recovery tool, sharing can bring about certain challenges. One of these is the common issue of oversharing. Heather highlights this by narrating an instance where she was challenged by another person's extensive sharing.















Creating a Safe Space







Creating a safe and trusting environment is crucial for effective sharing. Many meetings ask members to not “crosstalk”, where one person's sharing draws an immediate response from someone else. This helps to maintain this safe space. It’s essential for each of us to keep the focus on ourselves. This way, all attendees can openly share their feelings and experiences without feeling judged or interrupted.







Cultivating humility







Heather's reflection on this concept is insightful – our recovery journey is ours and ours alone. No share is more valuable or insightful than the other, and no member should dominate others with their contribution. Al-Anon's Tradition 8 (Al-Anon Twelfth Step work should remain forever non-professional…) reminds us that every attendee is seen as equal, each carrying their own experiences, strength, and hope.







Conclusion







Sharing in meetings is a pivotal practice in Al-Anon – one that encourages honesty, openness and cultivates a supportive community. With each share, we walk further from our pain and closer to serenity, helping us internalize the power of Al-Anon's founding principles.







Readings and Links







Heather read from Courage to Change, Nov 3 (p. 308)







We also mentioned these books: Reaching for Personal Freedom, Hope for Today, and Paths to Recovery.







Upcoming topics







I am planning a series of episodes on the 12 Steps. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecovery.show with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.















Music from the Show











Kelsea Ballerini – Overshare











Rita Ora – Keep Talking











Jennifer Nettles – You Will Be Found

In February, 2023, Spencer gave a talk at the 71st Greeley AA Stampede. This is that talk.















Readings and Links







The Greeley AA Stampede is an annual AA conference with Al-Anon participation. Find out more at their website.







A listener asked about finding “speaker tapes” online. Two sources are XA Speakers and Recovery Radio Network.







A couple listeners have asked about the “adult child” oriented podcasts I've been listening to. They are Fragmented to Whole and Adult Child Podcast.















Music from the Show











Coldplay – Fix You











Sarah McLachlan – Sweet Surrender







Kimberly suggested this next song.











INXS – Don't Change

Listen to the experience, strength and hope, questions, and fears of 30-ish listeners of The Recovery Show. Hear from members on topics such as these:









* Coping with the effects of addiction







* The recovery process







* Working the Al Anon program







* Sponsorship in recovery







* Understanding self-centered behavior







* Acceptance of powerlessness







* Reflections on past recovery experiences









Here are few moments that you might connect with:







Sue wrote, “While listening to Debra C. share on your podcast, I realized she was telling my story. I took away many things, but mainly that ‘hands off, pays off’ is my new mantra.”







Mike said, “If someone is trapped and has no resources or outside help, and has been through this before, they may fawn. That is, they may become compliant or even take the side of the oppressor to soothe, distract, or somehow deflect or minimize the harm that is coming their way.”







From another Sue, “[Your podcast] has helped me find a path into the spiritual side of the program. This is something I never expected to be possible for me.”







Mary said, “Al Anon taught me that his alcoholism is about him, not me, and also that I didn't cause it, can't control it, and can't cure it. But I sure can contribute to it. And I did do that by reacting in a way that was not helpful to him or me or the situation.”







Louise is “so grateful for the tools of recovery that have given me the ability to navigate the halls of alcoholism.”







There are many more moments such as these in the full episode.







Episode links







These episodes were mentioned by contributors:









* 402 Gossip







* 401 What is my Motive?







* 322 Deborah C – Hands Off Pays Off







* 132 Living with Lies







* 381 Acceptance as a Gift of Recovery







* 394 People of Color in Recovery – Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Belonging







* 403 Inaction and Reaction: Navigating the Path to Meaningful Action







* 9 Step 2







* 296 Spiritual Awakenings and Experiences







* 358 Al-Anon after Divorce







* 354 Making Decisions









Music











Lean on Me – Bill Withers

The 12 steps are indispensable in the journey towards healing. They can spark enlightenment, foster growth, and propel personal transformation. In this episode, Spencer, Karen, and other contributors explore several approaches to working the 12 steps.







Acknowledging Variety and Personalizing the Process







12-step recovery does not have a ‘one-size-fits-all’ approach. Members apply the steps to their own lives in differing ways. The Al-Anon literature includes several guides to the steps, and sponsors may suggest yet other approaches. Some members may need to start with a deep exploration of their powerlessness, while others may need “emotional detox” before they can even start looking at the Steps.  







The Importance of Sponsors in the Recovery Journey







Assistance from sponsors, mentors, or “fellow travelers” can be instrumental in easing the 12-step process. Whether helping with the complex aspects of the journey or offering insights for self-development, the value offered by mentors can be immeasurable. Often, sponsors can help people identify the steps they need to apply the most, thereby confronting the challenge head-on.







Working the Steps: Different Approaches, Same Journey 







In the realm of recovery, three popular tools to work the steps in Al-Anon are the books Paths to Recovery, Blueprint for Progress, and Reaching for Personal Freedom..







Paths to Recovery offers a comprehensive guide through the 12 steps, with some questions that help focus thoughts and inspire deep reflection. It may present a long journey, sometimes up to two years per complete cycle, but with patience and perseverance, progress can be made.







Blueprint for Progress, another workbook, provides a detailed walk through Step four, conducting a deep dive into one's inventory, listing shortcomings and assets alike.







Reaching for Personal Freedom is a newer book. It guides an examination of the Steps, Traditions, and Concepts, focusing on how these can be applied to our personal lives.







The common thread with these books is their focus on applying the 12 steps to daily life, transforming not only habits but an entire inner worldview. 







Overcoming Challenges: The Essence of Step Four 







Step Four, involving a ‘Fearless and searching moral inventory,' can be challenging. It is during the process of Step Four that the strength and support of a sponsor becomes critical. Often, a sponsor will suggest a particular practice of working Step 4, usually because it is the way they have worked that step in their own recovery.  Some have found the “4 column” approach described in the book Alcoholics Anonymous to be useful. As a sponsor, however, we should also be sensitive to whether the proposed approach is working well for the person we are guiding.







An Ongoing Learning Process







Working the steps is an ongoing learning process, finding new layers of understanding and inner growth at every step. Some of us have found that we can apply the 12 Steps to particular incidents or actions in our lives, whether alcohol is involved or not. Sometimes a quick run through the steps can lead us to “promptly admitting” our faults, as suggested by Step 10. For most of us, working the steps is not “one and done” but is a lifelong process of personal growth. It is truly about a journey,

Did you attend the 2023 Al-Anon International Convention? If you didn't, have you wondered what it was like? In this episode, Heather, Racheal, and Spencer share our expectations of the convention, what happened at the convention, what we learned, and what we are bringing home.















Contact the show







You can leave a voicemail at 734-707-8795 or email feedback@therecovery.show with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.















Music from the Show











The Beatles – All You Need is Love