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Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savage.love and get yourself a subscription.

Savage Lovecast Dan Savage

    • Health & Fitness
    • 4.7 • 775 Ratings

Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savage.love and get yourself a subscription.

    Mistress, may I say "whore?"

    Mistress, may I say "whore?"

    An Australian woman in her mid 20s fondly remembers the intimate online relationship she had throughout high school. She thought he was 20, and though they never met in person, they would chat well into the early hours every night. Recently, she became curious about what became of him. She learned that he was in fact 35 at the time, with a wife and kids. When she confronted him, he was self-pitying in his defense. This relationship was good for her at the time. But the lie is galling, and if he did this to her, is he still pretending to be someone he isn’t for other young women/girls? Should she tell his wife and blow up his life? 
    It’s hard to be ethically non-monogamous! It really is! This is what a man and his wife have learned after she cheated on him with a man who was cheating on *his* wife. Are there resources for folks trying to be open and honest? 
    Our all time favorite dominatrix, Mistress Matisse is back to discuss a few thorny issues. 1) Can we call ourselves and our pals “whore” in a sex-positive “take it back” kind of way? Or is the word off-limits unless you are an actual sex worker? 2) After 4 months, a sex worker in her 30s has fallen in love with her 64 year-old married client. Now what? And, 3) a woman is super annoyed that her husband needs to process their relationship for hours before he will finally fuck her already. You’ll hear question #1 on the Micro and all of them on the Magnum.
    Finally, a man with an 8 inch penis is using a penis extender to get even more length. He’s been wearing the device for two months, but he’s beginning to lose sensitivity. Is he putting his Weiner in danger? Is it worth it? 

    Yes and no.
    voicemail@savagelovecast.com        206-302-2064


    This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep-the best mattress for your individualized comfort. Right now, get up to $200 off ALL mattress orders at HelixSleep.com/SAVAGE.

    Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage

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    • 51 min
    England has Sex Scandals Too!

    England has Sex Scandals Too!

    “Help! I’m trapped with my very nice in-laws! “ An introverted woman loves her husband’s family dearly. But when they all descend on her house and stay for weeks with their kids and their dinners and their constant togetherness, she loses her mind. How can she carve out a little alone time without offending the herd? 
    A lesbian connected with a super-hottie bisexual. They planned to hook up, but the hottie asked if they could get some video or pics and show to her boyfriend to turn him on/make him jealous. As a lesbian, the caller recoils at the idea of providing “content” for some man. She and Dan discuss the matter. You get to hear their conversation.
    We have two guests for you this week. Did you know that England has sex scandals too? They do! Rachel Cunliffe, the Senior Associate Editor of the New Statesman, is on to talk about the naughty MP Neil Parish who resigned after he was discovered watching porn on the crowded House of Commons floor. 
    And on the Magnum, Dan chats with Searah Deysach from Chicago’s Early to Bed, about finding the elusive silent vibrator.
    Finally, a man hooked up with a guy who bragged about some of his exhibitionist exploits. Would you like to hear what they were? You’ll have to listen to find out. But, the caller is worried that this man will get in trouble, or be seen by a child or other non-consenting person. Is he a prude to cut off relations at this point? 

    Voicemail@savagelovecast.com.  206-302-2064

    This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.
    Today’s Lovecast is brought to you by MeUndies.com: High quality, super-comfortable, good looking undies. Get 15% off your first order when you go to MeUndies.com/Savage.

    • 51 min
    Who are these sex doll owners?

    Who are these sex doll owners?

    A man is excited to marry his beloved fiancé. But he harbors a corrosive secret. Early in their relationship he went to massage parlors for happy endings. He’s done with all that now, and feels terribly ashamed. But should he tell her? Does he owe her the truth? Can she handle the truth? Can he handle a lifelong secret? 
    A woman used to have bad sex in her youth, with lots of unrequited blow jobs. Now that she’s with an attentive, loving boyfriend, she would like to give him toe-curling oral sex. But she can’t get the distaste for them out of her head. How can she learn to love giving them again? 
    On the Magnum, Dan interviews psychology professor Dr. Craig Harper about his research on sex doll owners. Is there a personality type associated with sex doll ownership? What kind of relationships do they have with women? 
    Finally, if a guy has an STI, does his semen taste different? 

    Like butterscotch maybe?
    voicemail@savagelovecast.com     206-302-2064


    This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep-the best mattress for your individualized comfort. Right now, get up to $200 off ALL mattress orders at HelixSleep.com/SAVAGE.

    This episode is brought to you by Dipsea: an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. Get an extended 30 day free trial when you go to dipseastories.com/savage. 

    • 49 min
    Rethinking Sex with Christine Emba

    Rethinking Sex with Christine Emba

    A gay man discovered that his friend had a nude photo of him on his phone. The caller had asked him to take the picture so he could edit it and send it to someone. But the friend kept the pic for himself and sent it to other people without the caller’s knowledge or consent. So. Can they still be friends? How bad is this?
    A queer woman has been on 2 dates with a gal, and they are getting along really well. The caller did a deep internet search and discovered that her date is in fact trans. Not only had the woman not disclosed this, but she volunteered that she was cis, and talked about having period cramps in her youth. Lies? Why would she lie? The caller is very game to date a trans woman. How should she proceed? 
    Our guest this week is Christine Emba, author of “Rethinking Sex: A Provocation.” And Dan was indeed provoked! They discuss her critique of sex culture in which attaining consent is considered a high bar to clear when in fact it is the very lowest bar. Choking? Sadism? What is wrong with us? They talk about kink-shaming, Armie Hammer, how to avoid terrible people and much more. A little is on the Micro, the whole fascinating thing is on the Magnum.
    And, a bisexual man and his wife have begun a wonderful triad with another bi man. But they have a 9 year-old daughter who will eventually catch on that mommy and daddy’s new friend is more than a friend. Should they tell her and get out in front of it before she thinks one of them is cheating? 

    Send us your tricky questions please. 
    voicemail@savagelovecast.com  206-302-2064

    This episode is brought to you by Allform- premium, customizable sofas and chairs shipped right to your door. For 20% off your perfect sofa, go to Allform.com/Savage.
    This podcast is brought to you by Stamps.com. Click on the microphone and enter “Savage” for postage, a digital scale, and a 4 week trial.
    This episode is brought to you by Talkspace- online therapy that makes it easy to get extra mental health support. For $100 off your first month, go to Talkspace.com and use the offer code Savage.

    • 58 min
    With Anna Sale!

    With Anna Sale!

    Mazel tov, you’re a new daddy! And by “daddy” we mean a queer, dirty-talkin’, older dom. A newly single bi man in his 40s suddenly finds himself with a bevy of young men who want him to play this role, and he doesn’t know where to begin. 
    More semen please! A man wants to know if the various foods and supplements that promise to increase semen volume really work. 
    On the Magnum, you should have seen the Tech-Savvy At-Risk Youth™ scurry around when we found out that Anna Sale was coming on the show. The host of Death, Sex & Money has a new podcast all about erectile dysfunction called HARD, so Dan chatted with her about ED and Viagra and much more. Unsurprisingly, Anna Sale was a delight. 
    And, can cis people use the term “dead-naming?” The caller saw a YouTuber complaining that some people in a bar had called out the name they read from his driver’s license. He now uses his slick YouTube handle and accused the bartender of “dead-naming” him. But isn’t this term specifically for people who use a trans person’s former name?

    People! Words Matter. 
    voicemail@savagelovecast.com 206-302-2064 

    This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

    This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep-the best mattress for your individualized comfort. Right now, get up to $200 off ALL mattress orders at HelixSleep.com/SAVAGE.

    • 52 min
    With Comedian Gianmarco Soresi

    With Comedian Gianmarco Soresi

    A woman discovered that her boyfriend cheated on her. How did she know? He washed his own sheets for the first time EVER. When confronted, (after lying at first,) he said that men need variety and monogamy is unnatural. Is this correct? 
    A man and his husband now live apart because one of them didn’t want to live in the cold, dark, rainy Pacific Northwest. But they still love and miss each other so much. The caller feels like his house is a museum of their love, with objects everywhere to remind him of his man. Should he sell the house and move on? 
    On the Magnum, Dan lures the delightful stand-up comedian Gianmarco Soresi, to give his straight male perspective on dating whilst famous and…dick picks. 
    And, a sex worker has a boyfriend who disapproves of her job. He started seeing another woman because he claims it’s the only way he can stomach his girlfriend’s profession. The caller agreed to let him see both of them, so long as the other woman knew about her. When the woman found out, she dumped the lad, leaving him seething with anger. Now the caller wonders…who is the a*****e? 

    There are going to be a few more single men after this show comes out…
    voicemail@savagelovecast.com 206-302-2064

    Today’s Lovecast is brought to you by MeUndies.com: High quality, super-comfortable, good looking undies. Get 15% off your first order when you go to MeUndies.com/Savage.
    Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage
    This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep-the best mattress for your individualized comfort. Right now, get up to $200 off ALL mattress orders at HelixSleep.com/SAVAGE.

    • 55 min

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5
775 Ratings

775 Ratings

casaburman ,

Dan is fantabulous

I’ve been reading Savage Love for 2 decades and I love him. He is funny. He is smart. He is empathetic. He is open. Enjoy ❤️

Proud daddy ! ,

National treasure

Thats wt someone once said about u n i 100%

Live in Canada but follow you for a lot of yrs

You a good person n i shaped a lot of my point of views on life listing to y Dan

Dan.....THANK YOU

GREG.
604.716.6664

NanoJuniper ,

So helpful

Dan is a reassuring voice of reason

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