Send us a text Our origin gives us our identity. We are God’s creation, not our own. We belong to God. Our identity is anchored in him. Yet just because we are all children of God, we are not all the same. Each of us is created with a unique, God-given design. We are all originals. This is fascinating. What is even more fascinating is that when we train up our minds to fan our distinctiveness into flame, when we take the time to train up our innate ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, we find our God-given sweet spot. And when we share that sweet spot with others, we put God on display to his watching world. This is the payoff. God gets the glory. We find our sweet spot, our flow. The thing is, for us, the idea of being unique, different, special can sometimes be more fascinating than the idea of putting God on display. The feeling we get when we thrive in our flow can be more fulfilling to us than the purpose we have been given to flourish as imagers of God. As a result, instead of anchoring our identity in our designer, we anchor it in our distinct design. And we get entangled in putting ourselves on display to God’s watching world. Rather than finding our flow, we find ourselves trapped in a vortex of performance, focused on proving our worth because our sense of self is dependent on our design. What do you know about your unique design? If you are a high-performing woman, especially one who has been shaped by college sports, you are likely driven by an inner motor. You have a clear, laser-sharp sense of direction—like you know exactly what you want and pursue it with focus and intent. And you are deeply committed to discipline and consistency. If this is you, you innately operate with what I call 3-D Leadership. Drive-Direction-Discipline. Your drive, direction, and discipline likely got you where you are today. But they can also the very things that burn you out. As you lean into your innate drive, your clear sense of direction, and your deep commitment to discipline, you may be leaning into a sense of self anchored in your distinct 3-D capabilities, unwittingly putting yourself on display to God’s watching world, even if you are not fully aware that this is your true focus. Rather than finding your flow, you find yourself trapped in a performance to prove our worth because your inner sense of self is defined by your outward behavior. How do you know if this is the case for you? When your ability to maintain a certain standard of behavior shifts, does your sense of self suffer? Do you wonder who you are if you cannot get the right things done in the right way? Does it seem that your powerful motor is sometimes driven by panic more than by pleasure? To share our sweet spot with others requires us to do what I talk about a lot in these podcasts, it requires us to individuate and relate. This is the definition of maturity, of growth. To individuate and relate is to be your unique self around others. It is to grow in front of people. It’s to learn to just be with people, and not have to be something for them. That’s vulnerable. If you want a way to put in the work to learn how to relate, to be with people without having to be something for them, that is what the 6-month MettlEdge SELECT Membership is all about. The tool you get in your first cohort session is my Bring the RAIN Tool. This tool gives you a practical way to unhook your identity from what you do so you show up fearless and free with others, serving them rather than performing for them. It gives you a meaningful way to connect with others, having a strong sense of self that comes from being anchored in your designer instead of in your design. And that’s jus Copyright 2025 Jill Williams & MettlEdge Performance Coaching
