Sloshbucklers Elaine Best
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- Comedia
An uncanny podcast that reviews canned booze!
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Ay, Corona! Hard Seltzer Review
Today, we’re drinking Corona Hard Seltzers! Be sure to follow Sloshbucklers on Twitter and Instagram @sloshbucklers.
Business inquiries: sloshbucklerspodcast@gmail.com
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Let’s get started!
00:46 Origins of Corona
4:06 Nutrition Facts: 4.5%, 90 calories, 0g carb, 0g sugar. Retails for $15.99.
4:42 The fun begins with my guest, Chandler!
6:00 Tropical Lime
10:48 Packaging Review
13:12 Waft
13:20 Taste Test for Tropical Lime: flavor and fizz level
22:25 Begin our dump cup where we pour all the flavors into one cup which we’ll drink at the end!
22:53 The Drinking Game: Regrateful
26:47 Elaine regrets the original drinking game she tried to make at 2 a.m. the night before recording this episode.
28:09 Chandler’s heartbreaking story about pizza.
30:11 Mango
33:58 Packaging Review
35:18 Taste Test for Mango
38:42 Regrateful
38:42 Chandler’s ex was arrested.
40:47 Mais, non pour Elaine.
44:46 Breathing Break: Falling Out and Box Breaths
47:54 Sobering Thought: Depressed Fish!
52:48 Blackberry Lime
53:44 Packaging Review
54:00 Waft
54:45 Taste Test for Blackberry Lime
59:00 Regrateful
59:04 Elaine coulda been an (artsy) contendah!
1:01:55 Chandler and friends!
1:04:00 For some reason we start taste testing my dog’s food and treats lol.
1:08:50 Secrets
1:18:52 Cherry
1:21:09 Packaging Review
1:22:03 Waft
1:22:15 Taste Test for Cherry
1:26:11 Regrateful
1:28:20 Time to drink the Dump Cup!
1:30:39 Overall Ranking
1:34:33 Outro -
From Russia With Love, Smirnoff Seltzer
*Drink responsibly*
Today, we’re drinking Smirnoff Seltzers! Be sure to follow Sloshbucklers on Twitter and Instagram @sloshbucklers. Business inquiries: sloshbucklerspodcast@gmail.com
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Privyet, Sloshbuckler!
2:13 The weird and wild history of P.A. Smirnov.
4:29 Nutrition facts: 4.5%, 90 calories, 1 carb, 0 sugar. Also, no vodka--still just fermented sugar like our other seltzers! Retails for $15.99.
5:17 The fun begins with my guest, Blaike! We chat about our experience with hard seltzer which morphs into our past with vodka lol.
9:45 Berry Lemonade
10:09 Packaging Review
12:44 If this can of Smirnoff Seltzer was a human, what would they be like? (A dangerous bit begins).
14:23 Taste Test for Berry Lemonade: Flavor and Fizz Level
18:18 Our ranking of BL using (in)famous Russians as our scale. (BL got a Trotsky, by the way).
19:34 The Drinking Game: Smirnophagus
21:08 Blaike takes his first turn at this off-brand Russian Roulette.
23:08 Elaine selects her pick from the wrapped doggy poop bags of mini bottles (we’re low budget).
25:10 Lemon Lime
25:48 Packaging Review, including our character updates for each flavor.
26:49 Taste Test for Lemon Lime
29:27 Our Russian Rating: Lenin and Dmitri
30:08 Smirnophagus: Blaike pulls another horrible mini bottle and Elaine also suffers.
34:10 Sobering Thoughts
40:46 Black Cherry
41:46 Packaging Review
42:11 Taste Test for BC
46:26 The Russian Ratings: Olga Romanov and Rasputin
48:47 Smirnophagus: The worst round yet.
55:53 It’s time for SECRETS SHHHH.
1:03:58 Orange
1:04:48 Packaging Review
1:05:08 Taste Test for O
1:09:13 The Russian Ratings: Ivan the Terrible and Lenin.
1:10:06 Smirnophagus: Florals and fruits.
1:15:12 Water, water everywhere…
1:17:08 Best and Worst Liquors Ranking
1:18:16 The Dump Cup: Trying all the seltzers mixed together.
1:20:48 Ultimate ranking 1-4 of Smirnoff Seltzers
1:25:03 Drinking the Dump Cup
1:26:14 A Dump Cup for all the mini bottles MWHAHA.
1:28:56 #Blainey
1:30:02 Farewell!
MUSIC
Epidemic Sound
You can get a free month with Epidemic Sound here: https://bit.ly/330Mtz9
Colors of an Artist
Double Whoosh
Whimsically Wonderful - Arthur Benson
Our Own Rhythm - River Run Dry
Shaving Grace - T. Morri
Amun Ra - Bureaucrap
Yesterday I Danced as Well - Little Island Leap
Fog of Moscow - Sight of Wonderss
Russian Folk Song - Traditional
Weapon of Choice - Fabien Tell
How to Tango - Arthur Benson
In St. Petersburg - Sight of Wonders
Out the Back (Sting) - Martin Carlberg
Esprit Pacifique - Martin Klem
Red Square Meeting - Trabant 33
Firesign - Jay Varton
When Morning Came - Clarke Russo
Our Gold Days - Heyday Highway
Desert Hideout - Christoffer Moe Ditlevsen
Oh Motherland by Sight of Wonders
For the Final Kingdom by Edgar Hopp
Why Even Bother by Isaac Larson
Around Every Corner by Arthur Benson
Champions Day by Lupus Nocte
Angry Cats by Medité
Speak to Me Prague by Trabant 33
Grand Buffoon by Benjamin Rice
Primavera by Trabant 33
Moscow Sidewalk by Mike Franklyn
Balkan Parade by Stationary Sign
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The Truest of Trulys | Berry Mix Pack
Today, we’re drinking the berry mix pack from Trulys! Be sure to follow Sloshbucklers on Twitter and Instagram.
Interested in partnering with Sloshbucklers? Reach out at sloshbucklerspodcast@gmail.com
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Sigh, here we go.
00:46 Nutrition facts for Trulys and its mysteriously missing Wikipedia page.
2:35 Meet Laura! What’s our experience with hard seltzer?
4:20 The Tale of Elaine, The Bachelorette, and a Cursed Recliner
10:45--12:28 You can skip over this part if you don’t like sick talk (we don’t get too graphic but if it’s not your thing at all, hop ahead!).
13:10 Live Long and Prosper: The Aftermath
15:00 The Drinking Game: Seltzer Symbel
15:55 Packaging Review
19:35 Taste Test: Raspberry Lime
20:23 Seltzer Symbel: Here we go.
21:30 Flavor review: Berry vs. Citrus
24:30 Seltzer Symbel to small birds. Screw big birds.
26:42 Ranking thus far (spoiler alert: raspberry lime is in first...and last).
27:21 We will create and drink the Truest Truly, a goblet filled with EVERY FLAVOR OF TRULYS that we’ll drink at the end of the episode.
29:00 Taste Test: Wild Berry
30:09 Seltzer Symbel to onesies.
31:08 Flavor review
32:50 The Wild Berry Daydream
33:20 What drives you WILD?
35:15 Ranking thus far between Raspberry Lime and Wild Berry.
35:40 Sobering Thought: Towns that drowned in things other than water (very uplifting).
39:35 Taste Test: Black Cherry
40:31 Artificial cherry flavor debate
43:10 Seltzer Symbel to our favorite memes.
44:00 Flavor review
46:00 Ranking thus far
47:15 Seltzer Symbel to the journey of FRIENDSHIP, college trash, and Build-A-Bear
49:52 Secrets
50:53 Elaine’s secret toilet.
54:09 A surprising essay emailed to Laura from a long-ago “friend.”
56:51 Bagel Bites Break. Secrets shall now resume.
57:21 Seltzer Symbel to Bagel Bites.
57:55 The strange essay secret continues.
1:10:21 Taste Test: Blueberry Acai
1:10:53 Packaging, wtf is acai, and real vs. artificial blueberry flavor.
1:13:00 Wafting
1:13:49 Seltzer Symbel to Brandon, for that is how he introduced himself.
1:14:16 Flavor review
1:16:30 Setlzer/Bagel Bite Symbel to Oprah.
1:17:47 Final Review: Chuggability, Flavor, and Overall Ranking
1:19:44 Setlzer Symbel to our favorite flavors.
1:20:06 The Truest Truly: Drinking every flavor at once. And the final Seltzer Symbels.
1:23:11 Flavor review
1:26:26 We’re barely alive.
1:27:17 Outro
MUSIC
Epidemic Sound
Crusade - Video Classica by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100884
Artist: http://incompetech.com/ -
White Claws and Dragons
Thanks so much for listening to Sloshbucklers! You can follow the podcast on Twitter and Instagram @Sloshbucklers. New episodes come out every other Thirsty Thursday so until then, drink your water!
TIMESTAMPS
00:48 White Claw origin story and nutrition facts.
2:23 What’s our previous experience with hard seltzer?
3:56 Opening the Mystery Bag for the first flavor, Red Raspberry!
4:33 Packaging Review. Do you feel inferior to this can? Does it feel hardcore?
8:27 Welcome to our drinking game, White Claws and Dragons!
9:40 Meet your Bard, Dwyane “Brock” Johnson!
10:33 Meet your Cleric, Thad Pitt!
11:32 Taste Test for Red Raspberry (RR).
13:50 How does RR rank so far?
15:08 White Claws and Dragons: The First Scenario Cards
16:00 How our characters know each other.
17:05 Brock Johnson’s first adventure in Applebee’s: A RIDDLE.
19:00 Thad Pitt’s first adventure. Where’s the queso?
20:37 Second drink revealed from the Magic Box: Natural Lime!
21:30 Taste Test for Lime
23:10 Cocktail Time: Kameron decides to mix her White Claws.
23:11 Our ranking thus far between RR and Lime.
25:45 White Claws and Dragons: Scenario 2
25:52 Brock takes the mic at karaoke.
29:39 Thad Pitt runs into his ex at the bar.
Scenario 3
34:02 A wizard visits Brock while he’s taking a whiz.
38:05 Thad falls into a thirst trap full of Cougars.
42:54 Vibe check after two hard seltzers and many drinks.
43:24 Sobering Thought: The most boring day in history. Drink some water!
46:48 Chip saga.
47:31 Drink 3: Red Ruby Grapefruit ft. the new Secret Magic Box song.
50:20 Taste Test for Grapefruit.
53:36 White Claws and Dragons: Scenario 4
53:48 Brock is tested at karaoke once more and man, he feels like a woman.
56:50 Thad casually encounters A DRAGON. Not all is at it seems.
1:04:35 Drink 4: Black Cherry
1:05:50 Package review.
1:06:42 Taste Test for Black Cherry.
1:10:40 White Claws and Dragons: Scenario 5
1:11:00 Brock runs into his third-grade teacher and things get awkward.
1:14:15 Thad Pitt moseys on down to the loo when he bumps into a waiter, Sherry Thatsit, who is carrying many drinks.
1:16:36 SECRETS.
1:21:08 Blind Taste Test
1:23:50 White Claws and Dragons: The Final Claw
1:24:05 Kameron must drink an entire goblet of all the flavors. Thad Pitt makes the most of spilling all the drinks.
1:23:47 Elaine has to drink seltzer upside down. Brock enjoys a keger with the men’s choir.
1:28:25 Overall rating of all the flavors.
1:30:05 Outro!
Drink responsibly! -
Welcome to Sloshbucklers, Adventurer!
Welcome to Sloshbucklers, the uncanny podcast that reviews canned booze. I’m your host, Elaine Best, and in every episode, a guest and I will experience the wonders of canned alcohol. Don your salmon shorts and find a boat because season one is gonna be about HARD SELTZER. Each episode will also have its own drinking game, and since seltzer is quite bubbly, the house rules require all participants to drink every time someone burps. New episodes release every other Thirsty Thursday so be sure to follow this podcast to stay updated on the adventure!
Drink responsibly and journey on, Sloshbuckler.
Instagram and Twitter: @Sloshbucklers