12 Folgen

You're Nearly Dead is a podcast about taking creative chances and risking failure. In each episode, lifelong scribblers Charlie, Matt, and Ben bring a piece of writing, written to theme, and share them with each other and the listeners. It's kind of a competition, but it's really not.

You're Nearly Dead The Very Good Network

    • Kunst

You're Nearly Dead is a podcast about taking creative chances and risking failure. In each episode, lifelong scribblers Charlie, Matt, and Ben bring a piece of writing, written to theme, and share them with each other and the listeners. It's kind of a competition, but it's really not.

    YND 15: What Are You Doing

    YND 15: What Are You Doing

    This week’s theme is Poetic Audio Description, which is interpreted to varying levels of literality by our hosts. Do the pieces reveal the inner workings and dark opinions of their writers? Will Charlie return to form after his devastating Lame Duck in ep. 14? And most importantly, will Matt give Charlie the satisfaction he craves, and give up his well won cup? There’s (mainly) one way to find out. BEN What Are You Doing It is night, but an orange light is cast by a string of bare outdoor bulbs, many of which are broken. At a bench in a beer garden after hours, sits a man in his late 20s, straddling the seat and looking at the littered floor. Though he makes no effort to leave, his posture suggests that he knows he should. He sips beer from a tulip glass and smokes a found filtered cigarette. Exhaling deeply he stubs it out and pulls an Apple laptop from his backpack, swinging his legs around in a gesture of resolve. He begins to type. The man counts the bulbs, assesses the discarded cigarette ends and pizza boxes, sips his drink, and continues typing. He finishes his drink and leaves the garden to fetch another. And then another when the second runs dry. He stops typing and leans back squinting at the screen. In one move he closes the computer and swivels again to mount the ashen wood. He finishes his drink. He fetches another. MATT What Are You Doing There’s a warm prick in the air. A kitkat wrapper tumbles past, seemingly through sheer boredom It’s not a bustling high street, by any means 10.45am Why aren’t these people in work? Most of them are elderly Struggling with their shopping As I look on. Is 'blue rinse' still a thing? I daren’t interrupt the stagger of This old man in the oversized suit Which once fit when he was fatter Else he might keel over from swivelling. Plus he probably doesn’t know. I’d be better off asking This well-permed woman With a tight off-white bob With empty bags. CHARLIE What Are You Doing There's a spoken word tent And a rusty LDV minibus with the rear windows covered by taupalin Mattress in the back, MOT and road tax missing presumed expired I see bongos. Dormant but ominous at the open back of a canvas tent Dreadlocks everywhere, some matted. News that the hosepipe ban has been lifted is yet to reach this once-pleasant park Are these people happy? If anything they look too happy All on giff gaff, with no visible means of support I am trying to understand

    YND 14: Dirty Maze

    YND 14: Dirty Maze

    This week’s theme is ‘Travel Diary’. If that sounds confusing, your hosts agree. But never one to shirk a challenge, they get down and dirty in the word maze with 3 very different interpretations. Who will arise victorious? You’ll never guess! MATT Tuesday 12th June Up at 9am, yoghurt for breakfast. Set off around 10.30am: Wangmouth! Very fine beach, terrible looking pubs, and shops. Horse House Hotel turned out only served food to its patrons. Boo. Found a bakery, who produced a couple of crab sandwiches, grabbed local cider and Bad co. cans and headed to find a spot. Very few people around, mostly dog walkers and a few munty families with toddlers. After a tasty lunch, headed to the park. Swings at the business end. There was a small boy, must have been 4 or 5 with no-one to push him. Duly obliged, gently, provoking a fit of giggles. In between bursts of gravity’s lyric, I was being nagged by a slight uneasiness. Where was the parent and/or guardian, and is what I’m doing OK, as an adult man? My mind struggled to escape the hysterical labyrinth, which it wouldn’t have had the opportunity to get lost in had the boy and I been of a similar age. The uneasy feeling magnified, when a man made mostly of scalp jogged over and asked me, ‘WHAT ARE YOU DOING’ and pulled (what I hoped was) his son away. Despite my annoyance at the loud exclamation of something suspicious, I refrained from offering an antagonising quip. Such as ‘paedophiling’. That certainly wouldn’t have helped. Would it have been better for everyone if I’d not pushed the boy at all? Came back and made a light supper of squid rings, chilli bread, salad and Bombay mix. Stayed up listening to Takes a Worried Man and singing it loudly until the sky said to stop, around 11.30pm. CHARLIE I knew I would love this job. I remember the Moscow lecture halls and books. Learning with frustrated impatience my profession: engineering. But my mind was 2000 kms from Moscow. 2602 from home In a hive of muddy trails, ravenous rivers, and punishing cold Where I can be tested, where I can be a man. Which is where I find myself today, with a small group of other graduates Helping in the business of transforming our endless forests into Chinese furniture I’m not like the others. There is a ZiL with six long tonnes of logs sunk in the deep river I go with Peter, one of the drivers. He lives only for drinking I live only for working. Our truck sinks too, until the pressure of the water smashes Peter’s window. I feel the cold. She said I was cold when she ended it, just before I left. BEN Maize Further from now Than from when we were born We spent a day in the dusty corn Charged with lust And a long to play We followed paths trying to find Our way to the middle We found it

    YND 13: Got Clogged

    YND 13: Got Clogged

    The theme this week is Country! Given that two of our hosts play and write in a Country Rock band, they should knock it out the park. Or the country park, if you will. This week’s pieces: CHARLIE Cloggo It was 1889 They built this dirty maze of mine I keep things moving right below your feet Where the sun don't shine Is where I spend my time I know it better than I know the street All week I'm knee-deep (But My girl is) so sweet When I leave it behind Til one day I saw that She was on her back With the guy the keeps the drains in town intact Now when you're feeling fine In 2099 You won't know what's right below your feet It's my baby And the drain man maybe The other sewer rats have had a treat BEN Clogged When you asked, in your gentle tone To use the most private part of my home I was torn to tell the tawdry truth That room belies my ample youth I would not wait on this stalemate My body’s a temple I desecrate Now the pipes are packed, the flow is low And I don’t know when I’ll next go To save us both the grievance I’d find another convenience Clogged I got clogged Now I cannot find my way through the fog Clogged I got clogged Now my love is like a broken bog MATT Got Clogged When you left me I was torn in two Between Two halves of broken heartache Like this I’ve never seen Before I can make it to my feet I’ve hung my head and cried. But I’m a rock. And I gotta keep rolling on. Cos if I don’t I know I won’t be the man That I want to be I’ll be stuck in a rut I’ll be too cut up to see What else is out there And I ain’t standing No, I ain’t standing I ain’t standing for that. You’ve taken 12 of my years from me But None of that crossed your mind when it came to your cheating heart When you sat me down In this old chair To tell me you no longer cared... I’ll be a rock I gotta keep rolling on.

    YND 12: Above & Beyond

    YND 12: Above & Beyond

    p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 13.0px Helvetica} p.p2 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 13.0px Helvetica; min-height: 16.0px} p.p3 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 13.0px 'Helvetica Neue'; color: #4a4f56} p.p4 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 13.0px 'Helvetica Neue'; color: #4a4f56; min-height: 15.0px} The theme this week is rap, and our hosts tackle it like any white middle class english men would: with embarrassing enthusiasm and beats stolen from Dre. This week’s pieces: CHARLIE Miss Bliss and Mister Blister She’s sunshine’s brighter sister, with the Gist of her rays and her ways And her warm lazy gaze but not seeing Lookin’ but not being alive to the facts That where she’s warm, he lacks Any form of human quality at all But just a short lesson from this rapping impression This guy keeps me guessing’ but he keeps on impressin’ her BEN Bicycle Face I rode into the wind and I got disfigured Found no kinda gun Could get me triggered Chose harder higher gears to push through the years Working uphill for fear of going down I Tried to break And I broke Down Each passing place I passed the same Ticking off time And tasks the same Making me a machine My bike, my brain Got clogged with clay Saw the next place Refused to pass Left me laying On the cold damp grass These working days And our working ways Put every play in the past We are burning our way During our stay In order to travel through fast MATT Draggin’ I don’t take time to get to speed Accelerating, Never need More than what I’ve got — I’m never sweating any beads L-A-S-S I’m here to burn the finish line Smoking all these suckers In my mirrors they’re behind me. Taking the lead, Taking the top team To the limit and winning, Never stopping or giving Anything away This has always been my day For you this is do or die For me this is playtime Hold the red light I don’t want you disqualified I’m here to see your face On the video rewind V-E-G-A, yeah that’s me Taking it above and beyond The whole scene.

    YND 11: Big Money

    YND 11: Big Money

    After weeks of solidly sensible stanza, will our hosts rise to the bait and write a silly one? The answer is: No. No. Yes. To find out what that means, you’ll just have to listen. BEN The Best Deal I got the Best Deal And three TVs in my room I like to use the the phone But no one seems to be home I got the Best Deal but Doing nothing I’d have more These white trash are just like me But they’re poor I got the Best Deal But that bum has more than me 8 billion dollars more And he sleeps there for free I got the Best Deal but They won’t let me lock the door I leave things as I want them But they clean them off the floor My wife has her own room So I can be alone With Mcdonalds for dinner In my empty white home MATT Big Money You’re always unbearable when I’m not in the mood And vice versa And in fact, of course — everything is, I’m being idiotic. Moods are stupid. A rapid list of what’s wrong what’s not happening All coinciding at the same instance: right now. "Just get over it," I think “Have a bath, and get over it” I help with the main thing, Then I say “Have a bath” And walk away, downstairs Back to my book. As I begin to read, My mind is distracted That in fifty years I hope I’ll get to say: "Let me be devoted, a little while longer Yours is the only love I've ever truly wanted” I stop. Because I’ll never know when it’ll all end I should go and say that to you now. CHARLIE Big Money I got a big pot o’ honey They call me big money I’m a storage hunter With all them other munters But no one knows the real me They just go off a what they see Big money, big funny, big dummy Got a pot full of fam, pot full of friends They’ll be there till the endz My pots full of life, pots full of strife Pots full of love from above and beyond The millis don’t make me nor will they take me Big money just ain’t me And given that Matt requested Trump translation of Ben’s piece, here’s the the first line in Trump speak: This is a very good looking group of people here. Could I just go around so I know who the hell I'm talking to... I got the best deal. My hands can hit a golf ball 285 yards. (Courtesy of http://www.donaldtrumptranslator.com/)

    YND 10: Friends I Cannot Stand

    YND 10: Friends I Cannot Stand

    This week’s theme is an invitation to the nasty ball, but how will our hosts RSVP? Will Matt and Ben cast off their nice guy shackles? Will Charlie pull a muscle trying to get there early? Is he, in fact, already there? Listen in to find out. This week also featured the second piece in Ian’s Listener Residency. MATT Friends, I cannot stand — This tiresome twist Drinking to oblivion, I’ve done before But on your birthday Is quite remiss of me. Was I charming? I distinctively recall boorishly announcing the of arrival my favourite waitress And blaming the cigarette For the vomit. Please, Give me time — I’ll choose which path to take One of drunken bastardness Or tedious sobriety. CHARLIE I'm told that I'm a free man But oppression always says that Years ago, I would have been fused to the land Giving up everything I grew That may be in the past But today, I have to do a podcast. BEN Master Paul Charles Peyton Higgitt Dreamt of a status beyond his limit He wanted his last name to last much longer He thought both barrels would make him stronger But despite a future in learning and law He filed the papers with one fatal flaw Like a child on christmas He rushed to the post Opened his present While toasting his toast And discovered that much to his middle class shame He’d gone double-barrelled And kept both middle names Master Paul Charles Peyton Peyton-Higgitt Dreamt of a status that he couldn’t mimic A costly education cost him dearly He could not stand his family to live so nearly He went to the big apple to make big money Where he hoped his big name would not seem so funny IAN The Coat It hangs, flowing vessels of muscle, and the touch is soft like the skin I connect with it. The smell it releases brings back concoctions of deadly potions that used to keep me lingering. The smell turns to taste and sits in the back of my mouth, smoothing over buds, bringing a familiar flavour. As the vessels sway, the gentle sound of fabric on fabric, pulls back memories of sleeves that wisp in the wind, like searching fingertips. The coat looks old and battered like the tree we would always see. Watching as things blossomed, watching as winter came.

Top‑Podcasts in Kunst

Zwei Seiten - Der Podcast über Bücher
Christine Westermann & Mona Ameziane, Podstars by OMR
life is felicious
Feli-videozeugs
Augen zu
ZEIT ONLINE
Fiete Gastro - Der auch kulinarische Podcast
Tim Mälzer / Sebastian E. Merget / RTL+
Clare on Air
Yana Clare
eat.READ.sleep. Bücher für dich
NDR