Cold Man Cast Cold Man Cast

If I were clever enough I would come up with a situation regarding the podcast, and present it here as a Catch-22. For we have reached episode number 22, and what other novel than that of monsieur Jospeh Heller's 1961 classic to wittily reference in this here podcast description. But, listener, I must admit that having indeed started the classic novel, I did not make it past about page 100, so therefore cannot make a clever reference. Obviously I understand the meaning of the phrase, but can't really be bothered to come up with one, so shut up.

As an apology for my brazen lack of effort, I offer you 25 minutes of high-quality podcast material, completely free of charge (though obviously donations are welcome). As always, get in contact on twitter @coldmancast or send us one of those electronic mails - no need for stamps!! - at coldmancast@gmail.com.

Cold Man Fans, we come to you on our knees begging for forgiveness. It has been aprox 2 months since the last show and we can only imagine how hard it's been getting through those lonely winters nights without our voices in your ears, providing sweet release from your sad sad lives. Events have conspired against us (Michael was arrested on trumped up littering charges, then Tom was offered a big radio job in Slovenia, which he only realised was a scam when he arrived to find the country had not existed since 1991) but now the boys are back, and light has returned to all our lives.

In this big come back episode, expect a new game of Michael's devising, the last ever episode of 'Tom Be, or Not Tom Be?', 'Keep it Topical' and a celebrity anecdote from Tom.

As always, get in touch with us on @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com.

"The wreath is on the door, the tinsel's on the tree. And there is nowhere else that I would rather be."

If you are not au fait with these wise words, then hang your head in shame, for those are the sentiments of none other than our band, I am the Cold Man. But little did you know that in those lines we were referencing this very moment: the right here, the right now. For you are about to embark on a Christmas miracle.

This episode represents the coming together of two great occasions; a dovetailling that never before has been so fortunate, and so timely. For not only is this the Cold Man Cast Christmas special - expect bells, crackers and pop tarts... - it is also the 20th episode of this now firmly-established bastion of British comedy and culture. The Cold Men are here to celebrate this momentous occasion with you (it would be weird if they weren't) so please stop roasting your chestnuts on an open fire, and start a-listening to this special episode of the podcast.

Remember to get in contact on @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com. And. of course, have a Merry Christmas!

19. It's a song by Paul Hardcastle, the bar area at the end of an 18 hole golf course, the average age of a US combat soldier in the Vietnam War, and now, the number of episodes the Cold Man have cast out all over the world wide web. We have not turned tail, and run from this clearly intimidating number, but we stand tall and join the ranks of those other great 19s.

This week, look forward to new feature 'Tom Be or Not Tom Be', a discussion about scarves, and some chat about Christmas shopping, which has been described as "boring". All this, and 'Keep it Topical', along with some quality chit chat. As always, you can get in touch on twitter @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com.

Welcome aboard the Cold Man bus. Today we will stopping at Chaplin Road, Copland Avenue, Ealing Road, Wembley Central Station... Oh no, hold on. That's the number 18 bus route in London. That's something completely different. We do apologise. But will offer no refunds. Take that up with the Oyster people.

If you wanted to get to Ealing Road you're going to have find another route, because this podcast will not be stopping anywhere near such a place. It was an easy mistake to make however, seeing as we have reached that famous milestone of 18 episodes. We are now old enough to drink, to vote and to buy fags and naughty magazines; what more could we want? But rest assured, instead of celebrating our 18th birthday in drunken style, we instead sat down and did a podcast for you lot. So enjoy some Keep It Topical, Record Breakers and Absolutely Fadulous. And don't worry, it's on us this time. But you can get the next round. Get in touch on twitter @coldmancast or email coldmancast@gmail.com.