Plumbing the Death Star Bad Brain Boys

Peter Parker aka Spider-Man loves to keep his identity secret as he’s worried all the powerful people he’s annoyed in his life of fighting crime will use his loved ones to get to him. And rightfully so! When Wilson Fisk finds out who he is he sends a sniper out to take out Aunt May. Or maybe she just gets caught in the crossfire? Maybe it was Crossbones? It’s been a long time. Either way, if his villains find out his Spider-Man it’s a slippery slope that ends up with his wife selling their marriage to a satan maybe. But we don’t want to go that far! We’re just a humble bug themed super villain team consisting of two Beetles and a Worm trying to work out the best way to get to Peter Parker through his loved ones. From going in too deep, to nephew cucking, to plain and simple gaslighting. We’ve got a lot of plans of how to get Spider-Man but not many ideas of why. It’s tough being a villain cursed with the knowledge of who Spider-Man is, probably best to make a deal with a satan and forget the whole thing.
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We’ve come a long, long way to get to this point. We have realistic robots, a rootin’ tootin’ theme park diorama and the biggest of dreams. Now we just need the money to make it happen! So help us put on our cleanest black or white hat, saddle up our most comfortable horse because we have to pitch Westworld to investors. But when you really look at it, there’s not many gaps in the market for an anything goes wild west themed larp experience that’s extraordinarily expensive. To be honest, if you can’t make love to the robots I don’t think anyone would go. Which really makes you wonder why we even dress up our robot love making with this western aesthetic theme park and promise of immersive gaming? Surely we just cut to the chase and pitch a morally and ethically hostel to an extraordinarily wealthy person with extraordinarily dark proclivities to help them achieve their fantasy? It truly is a terrible idea for a theme park.
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It’s the end of the world as we know it, but we’re just lowly and loathed podcasters so what’s a boy to do to make themselves invaluable? Having no discernible talents but wanting to be witnessed, the boys set themselves the herculean task of surviving the Mad Max Wasteland. Jackson wants to be the only man alive that remembers Joey, huffing DVD cleaner to become the Situation Man. Zammit as Softhands the Shaftless remembers a career choice that is leaps and bounds more valuable than a podcaster but requires a copious amount of Mother’s Milk and a pre-emptive eunuching. And finally Joel Duscher aka Mr Speaks reckons his time dealing with absolute morons on a day to day basis (his two co-hosts) put him in the perfect position to bridge the language barrier between the warlords and the warboys. Oh what a day, what a lovely day to thread that needle of being invaluable enough to survive the wastelands, but not too invaluable that you become a target by other warlords. 
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Over the weekend Jackson watched The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants while eating paella, got excited for what he kept calling ‘magic pants’ and came bounding into the studio wanting to record an episode about ‘pants that fit anyone’ that ‘guarantee you have a pivotal moment in your life and ’possess the power of womanhood’. Thinking hahaha this should be fun, we hit record and now we’re left with this. Enjoy 40 odd minutes of two Joels disappointed in one Jackson as he takes us all on a journey about evil pants that he loves.
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