Ponder, Rosa Dani DeRosa

You’re worth more than even the concept of worth.

Comedy

It can be frustrating when you finally know you're on the spectrum but aren't connecting with the proper support. How have you found success with work, day to day tasks, social situations, etc? There's this feeling of "how much more of my life are these unknowns going to take?" I want to hear your struggles. I want to hear how about how you cope. 

Pondering the dynamics of responsible authority. 

Got boundaries? Let's discuss that. Rather- would you like to discuss that?

Mentioned cartoon, Tea Consent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQbei5JGiT8

Notes/a large chunk of the episode: 

I have a favor to ask of teachers. Maybe new ones or ones going through burnout. Don’t underestimate someone’s ability to learn or relearn. strive to personalize your teaching style as much as possible with this in mind. for example don’t go straight to punishment if a, I’ll just say subject because this could be a child, adult, student, family member, friend- don’t jump to punishment if a subject isn’t understanding. If their behavior isn’t appropriate in some way then talk to them about it, because they might not know. I think a lot of people of all kinds of ages are still open, or want to be open to learning, or teaching because teachers were and should still be students too. Because when learning happens in a way that’s actually interesting I think of that as discovery. “ooh what’s that? How does it work? Why did that person seem hostile and clearly thought they were being friendly?”

The other thing is once a student has left your class, leave them alone. The allotted agreed upon time or contractual time is over. It hopefully sounds obvious but not all teachers do it. Not all bosses do it. Not all people in all sorts of relationships recognize the importance of certain boundaries. Particularly if you are in a position of authority or perceived authority you need to learn to recognize when someone no longer wants to engage with you. I encourage you to think really hard on the meaning of consent. Look up “the tea” as a keyword and “consent.”

There’s this saying I’ve heard from a couple people who were abusers: “if you work at something long enough eventually it’ll break” or something like that. To an extent it’s good to have a persistent attitude but only when it only impacts you. So your exercise routine, the way YOU choose to have your coffee- the best way to get people to consider your thoughts is to ask them to listen. Don’t come up and start petting my dog. Don’t presume I want to talk with you because I don’t have to talk with you. It’s easy to ask “hey, may I pet Fido?” “Hey, I want to keep talking with you, is that okay?” Because if you think you’re going to intimidate someone into engaging with you you should not be in a position of authority. So I’d ask that you don’t underestimate someone’s ability to learn or relearn, figure out how to teach and learn about consent - most importantly figure out your boundaries because there are unfortunately people who will climb all over those for sport. It’s okay to tell people you don’t want to talk with them. It’s okay to physically say no or say nothing. You, if you don’t know, can choose to not engage with people who make you feel belittled or worse.

Thoughts?

Episode art by me, Dani DeRosa. Instagram: writeondani Patreon: daniderosa 

Unique brain? Neurological disorder? Have you attempted, failed at, worked around academic or professional life? How do you feel about competitiveness and is it excessive in some cases? Do you understand the part about the stapler and library drinking? I want to hear from you.