Why Am I Feeling Alone And Feeling........? In this powerful longer episode, I dive into the hidden causes of loneliness — why we feel alone, why it often starts as protection, and how we unintentionally reinforce it with the wrong questions. Then I'll guide you through a gentle, refined hypnosis process to help you reconnect with yourself, shift your emotions, and find comfort, peace, and connection again. Practical tools. Better questions. Deep self-work. And the reminder we all need: You are never alone. You are always with yourself. Here's The Key Takeaways Loneliness is often an unconscious protection response. You are always the centre of your own world — so get into rapport with yourself. Bad questions create bad emotional loops. Better questions create better states and better choices. Hypnosis can reconnect you to comfort, contentment, and possibility. Small steps lead you out of the familiar zone and into real change. If this helped, share it with someone who might need it today. https://personaldevelopmentunplugged.com/470-why-am-i-feeling-alone-and-feeling Subscribe. Follow. And wallow in pleasure at personaldevelopmentunplugged.com and paulcloughonline.com/podcast where all the free hypnosis tracks live. Shine Brightly 🌟 Paul Hey there! I'd love to hear from you—questions, feedback, requests—all welcome. Drop me a line or leave a comment. If you've enjoyed this episode or any other, please share and subscribe! You can reach me at feedback@personaldevelopmentunplugged.com. Subscribe to the Podcast Ready to subscribe? Click here to explore your options. Or, if you're on Apple Music or iTunes, you can go straight to subscribe or leave a review here. Special Programs for You For tools on developing Supreme Inner Confidence, finding Freedom from Anxiety, or specialized Hypnosis Tracks, visit PaulCloughOnline.com. Free Hypnosis Tracks Want access to my FREE hypnosis tracks? Head over to paulcloughonline.com/podcast. Connect with Me Follow me on Twitter: @pcloughie Remember: I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. This podcast and any of my online resources are for educational purposes only. Never use the hypnosis tracks or exercises if you're operating machinery, driving, or if you have epilepsy or psychiatric conditions. Always consult a healthcare provider if you're unsure. Find Us on Other Platforms Catch the podcast on Spotify, Castbox, iHeart Radio, YouTube, or on our Libsyn page. Stay tuned, and keep shining brightly. ✨ Music Credits Music by Wataboi from Pixabay, Music by DreamHeaven from Pixabay, Music by ccjmusic from Pixabay, Music by freegroove from Pixabay, Music by prazkhanal from Pixabay. And the transcript WARNING if you're a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry - you have been warned - is it an 'ism So welcome to a longer podcast. Why am I feeling alone? Why am I alone and feeling... And I said dot, dot, dot, dot, dot because we feel so many different emotions when we're alone, don't we? But a long time ago, when I was... I talk about going through my dark times and things like that, but as I was coming out of it, I got more into my journaling again and in the front of a journal, I just wrote this little sentence and it just made so much more sense to me and it was, you're never alone, you're never by yourself, you're always with yourself. You see, it doesn't matter where you go, does it? You can go everywhere to try to find yourself or you can go everywhere to fucking lose yourself, can't you? Keep changing the environment, hoping something's going to happen and guess what? You're always fucking there, you're dragging yourself along. It's your shadow, you are your own shadow, remember that, but you are never alone. You're never by yourself, you are always with yourself and when we can get into a rapport with ourself, that's when I think things really start changing. Now, have you also noticed wherever you are and whoever you're with, you're the centre of your world, aren't you? It doesn't matter, everything starts and ends with you. You choose to be, act and believe, that's it, it's your choice but it's all in here, you are, whether you're in a crowd, whether you're by yourself, you're always in here, you are the centre of your world and everyone else is the centre of their world and we choose to do what we do and that's it, so we're never alone because we're the centre of our world, so we're never alone, back to the beginning, never by yourself, you're always with yourself and here's a bit of a harsh reality. Solitude, loneliness, is a choice, your choice, though when it feels it isn't, you get that feeling of maybe, I don't know, despair, sadness, you come up with a negative emotion but it doesn't feel like a choice, does it? Because why would you choose something like that? I know I've been there a couple of times, one was not good but never really, really, really bad, but I can only tell you my experience, it just didn't feel like I was choosing to be that way, why the f**k would you? Why the f**k would you? But the thing is, what I did realise and I do believe, in fact I think I know it to be right but it's a belief, it could prove anything, I think it's your unconscious mind is trying to protect us in some way, what the hell it is, I don't know, but it's trying to keep us safe from something, maybe it's from even more hurt from the outside, something on the outside has hurt us and we put the barriers up, keep inside, shut people out, but the thing is we shut everyone out, don't we? Not just the people we consider may have hurt us or the things out there that have hurt us, but we shut everyone out. So it's an unconscious decision, do this, it's a behaviour, remember behaviours can all be changed by the way, so this isn't all dark, I'm just setting the scene of how I experienced it, but it is an unconscious process to protect you, and the thing is, I said this to everyone, wouldn't it be lovely, wouldn't it be great, wouldn't it be paradise, wouldn't it be absolutely the end of the world, if you knew, you could never be hurt, or you could do things and not feel hurt inside, and that's where the conflict comes in you see, because in order to protect us from being hurt, we're actually feeling hurt through this solitude, this loneliness, you know, through the feelings of despair, sadness or whatever, you fill in the bloody blank, it just doesn't feel good, and as a protection mechanism, I think it needs to be changed, don't you? If you could change it you would, wouldn't you? So, what do we choose instead of that isolation, what do we choose? Well actually, we tend to choose until we let it go, more isolation, more pain, because in some way it's now become familiar to us, isn't it? Because I don't call it a comfort zone, I call it a familiar zone, it's not comfortable, but we are familiar with this pain now, and we're not sure what's on the outside, and that can be a little bit scary, and we think it's the unknown, but we actually know it, we've walled it away, we've put a defence, an armour up, some type of war against all of this, we can't see through this pain, this despair, this sadness, this, you fill in the blank, to what's on the other side, it's that wonderful metaphor, a little brief one which says, when you're in the jar, you can't read the label. Now, here's the thing, I'm going to put myself in your position, your voice, and say, hey Cluffy, you keep telling me it's a bloody choice, don't you? Keep telling me a choice, do you think I'd choose this? That's what you're saying, isn't it? Do you think I'd choose this way? And I said, you know, that's what we say to ourselves, and yes, I do believe that it's a choice, but going back to what I said a minute ago, it's not a conscious choice, because consciously you would change if you could, but your unconscious mind says, I know better, I'm trying to protect you even more, and some time ago in the past, you know, it bloody worked, it had to have worked, your unconscious mind wouldn't keep doing it if it didn't work. As a prime director of your unconscious mind, it has to keep you healthy, and it has to keep you safe. And that's it, full stop. Keep you healed, keep you healthy, and well, healing, and keep you safe. Well, there's loads more, little bits, but they're the two prime directors of your unconscious mind. And one of the reasons I think it's reinforced as well, and you tell me if I'm wrong, is I know your unconscious mind is doing this more and more and more, more and more intense, hence we're getting these intense feelings of loneliness, sadness, despair, and all that stuff. It needs to be guided to a better way, but until we start talking to ourselves differently, what are you talking about? What I'm saying is, it's the questions that we ask ourselves. And the questions are, well, they're questions, but you don't always realise you're questioning yourself. The things like, why the hell is this happening to me? Why won't this ever end? Why me? And your unconscious mind is a wonderful servant, you see, it will go away through all your memories, memories of the past, and find examples of why it won't end. Examples of why it's all about you, why it's always happening. You see, they won't fit the whole, but they're close enough and it jams them in. Because you've asked what I would call a fucking boggy question. Now, what are yours? I've just told you a few, they must have been mine, I reckon. But what are your questions that you continually ask yourself? They may be things like, why me? You know, you hear people say, you know, if it's going to happen, it's going to happen to me, and it bloody does, because they're setting things up. So what are your questions? What are your questions? The answers will come to you. If they're out there, on that piece of paper,
