The EXTRAORDINARY Family Life Podcast Greg & Rachel Denning

"I'm writing to tell you both what an inspiration you've been to me over the last year! I've listened to almost all your podcasts and am working my way through the family systems and charts course. All your information is clear and practical, and it's made a huge difference in my level of overwhelm and what our family has been able to accomplish.

My husband and I are taking our kids (age 13 & 11) to Europe for 3 months this August, and I was wondering if you would have any tips for travelling with teens and tweens. I'm curious about:


How to find social opportunities and meet other families while travelling. I would love our kids to get out of the bubble of our small town and meet kids around the world!
Any budgeting ideas for travelling Europe?
Our kids are not homeschooled but I want to use this trip as an experiment in worldschooling/ homeschooling that we might continue when we get home. Any tips on introducing older kids to homeschooling would be appreciated.


Would love to hear you speak more about the practicalities of travelling with a family!"



Whether you plan to go to Europe for 3 months, or to take a day trip to a local town or the state next door, this episode is packed with practical and useful tips for making the most of your 'travel' experiences as a family.

Listen now!

And make sure to visit us at our new World School Family Resort in southern Portugal!



RESOURCES:

Let us help you in your growth journey.


Download the ⁠Be The Man app on iOS⁠ or ⁠Android⁠
Take the ⁠Be The Man 7-Day Challenge.⁠
Get Rachel's ⁠Family Systems & Charts⁠
Join the ⁠28-Day Challenge⁠ for Moms
Join the ⁠Be The Man Coaching & Tribe⁠
⁠Rachel’s Must-Read Booklist for Well-Read Moms
⁠Greg's Recommended Reading List for Parents & Youth
Gather with us at the World School Family (Beach & Farm) Resort in Portugal


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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

As a follow-up question to a recent episode about helping your spouse 'show up' or invest in your extraordinary life, we were asked:

"I love listening to your podcast. I'm a stay-at-home mom of four and I homeschool. I really wish I could live a little more extraordinarily as your family does, but alas, I have a spouse (who I of course love!) that doesn't feel the same. I desperately want to travel, but he doesn't. I long to do things a different way, but he doesn't. I like to read and listen to podcasts and all the like, but he doesn't.

But honestly, my real question here was about myself. You said something on your recent episode that hit me where it hurts. It was about how much hard work it is (an extraordinary lifestyle) and how it's kind of laughable to you now what you used to consider 'hard work'. I'm slightly ashamed to admit this but I can't seem to handle much. I want to be a hard worker, but it seems like other people are able to handle so much more than me.

I'm an introvert who is sadly socially awkward, needs lots of reflection time, and has never been encouraged or supported. I've never felt capable of much of anything. I want different for myself and definitely don't want my kids in this same boat!!

What is your advice for increasing my capacity to be able to handle more? Especially without any encouragement or support. I want better! I just don't know how to get there."



This is a FANTASTIC question and something we totally relate to as a former introverted, 'weak', shy, socially awkward girl or boy who never imagined that we would be coaching, hosting a podcast, or traveling the world with our seven children.

Listen to this episode to learn how we were able to overcome these 'limiting factors' that kept us from living a more extraordinary life. Discover how we built a foundation of positive habits using clarity, focus, and prevention so that we can direct more of our energy toward achieving the life of our dreams instead of existing in survival mode.



RESOURCES:

Let us help you in your growth journey.


Get Rachel's ⁠Family Systems & Charts⁠
Join the ⁠28-Day Challenge⁠ for Moms
Download the ⁠⁠Be The Man app on iOS⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠Android⁠⁠
Take the ⁠⁠Be The Man 7-Day Challenge.⁠⁠
Join the ⁠Be The Man Coaching & Tribe⁠
⁠Rachel’s Must-Read Booklist for Well-Read Moms
⁠Greg's Recommended Reading List for Parents & Youth
Gather with us at the World School Family (Beach & Farm) Resort in Portugal




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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

This much-needed episode addresses something we've been concerned about, thinking about, and researching for years regarding ADHD/ADD in adults and children.

Based on our own experience (having at least 3 kids with ADHD, and at least one of us -- Greg 😁) and experience gained by working with thousands of clients -- plus the added perspective of traveling to 50+ countries which provides a look at the way people do things around the world -- we share some unique and paradigm-shifting perspectives on ADHD and what it means for parents, children and families.

We talk about 'labels', diagnoses, 'drugs' and medication, disorders, hunters vs. gatherers' brains and so much more -- in fact, we may end up killing some of your 'sacred cows'.

Of course, we're not doctors and have no letters after our name so we obviously don't know anything. But this will be a fascinating listen nonetheless.

Listen to this episode now!



RESOURCES:

Let us help you in your growth journey.


Download the ⁠Be The Man app on iOS⁠ or ⁠Android⁠
Take the ⁠Be The Man 7-Day Challenge.⁠
FINALLY get organized with Rachel's ⁠Family Systems & Charts⁠
Join the ⁠28-Day Challenge⁠ for Moms
Join the ⁠Be The Man Coaching & Tribe⁠
⁠Rachel’s Must-Read Booklist for Well-Read Moms
⁠Greg's Recommended Reading List for Parents & Youth
Gather with us at the World School Family (Beach & Farm) Resort in Portugal


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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

In this episode, Greg and Rachel Denning answer this question:



"Wondering if you have advice for someone who has been trying to pour everything into life/marriage to make it extraordinary but the spouse is not showing up and 'being the man' as Greg has defined. If they try, they relapse or it seems like the bare minimum is done. It has been years of this and it feels like it’s holding us back from an extraordinary life. Wondering your thoughts on handling situations like that when it feels like you have tried everything and given it time."



The truth is an extraordinary marriage requires work. But Greg and Rachel Denning tackle the all too common dilemma: what to do when one spouse is giving their all to make their marriage extraordinary, but the other isn't stepping up.

They delve into the essence of a thriving marriage, emphasizing the power of daily choices and the need for 'extraordinary' effort (and why 'good' is not good enough).

Greg and Rachel stress the importance of utilizing the right tools (in the right way) even if you've 'tried everything' -- and persisting through challenges.

They explain the issue of 'collusion' and destructive, self-sabotaging patterns in relationships and explain how to break free from them.

Rachel highlights the significance of personal accountability and understanding the differences between men and women -- men need respect and women need to feel cherished -- for fostering a healthy partnership.

They urge spouses to 'bring the tide' and become agents of change in their relationships through self-improvement, emphasizing the effect 'bringing the tide' can have on spouses.

Offering practical advice, the Dennings present a roadmap for enhancing marriages even if you're the 'only one' -- with a warning against heeding misguided counsel (like Ruby Franke).

Key Takeaways:


Marriage requires continuous effort and dedication.
Small choices yield significant results over time.
Extraordinary effort is indispensable for exceptional outcomes -- but it's easier than it sounds.
Utilize the right tools and continuously expand your skill set.
Break free from destructive relationship cycles (collusion) by taking responsibility.
Understand and adapt to gender differences for a harmonious relationship.
Personal growth can inspire positive changes in your partner.
Consistency and unwavering commitment are crucial for marital improvement.

Timestamps:


00:00 Marriage is Tough
03:00 The Two Paths in Life
06:23 Exponential Results of Small Choices
10:07 The Need for Extraordinary Effort
13:15 Importance of the Right Tools
22:21 Being the Change in Your Marriage
27:22 Breaking the Cycle of Destruction
29:43 Understanding Differences Between Men and Women
31:59 Inspiring Change in Your Spouse
32:58 Taking Responsibility
39:16 Becoming a Catalyst for Change
45:32 Formula for Improving Your Marriage
50:22 Urgency of Making Changes
53:45The Dangers of Listening to the Wrong Advice
57:29 Consistency and Obsession



RESOURCES:


⁠⁠⁠Rachel’s ⁠Must-Read Booklist for Well-Read Moms⁠
⁠Greg's ⁠Recommended Reading List for Parents & Youth⁠
The Empowered Wife by Laura Doyle

Let us help you in your growth journey.


Download the ⁠Be The Man app on iOS⁠ or ⁠Android⁠
Take the ⁠Be The Man 7-Day Challenge.⁠


Join the ⁠28-Day Challenge⁠ for Moms
Join the ⁠Be The Man Coaching & Tribe⁠


Gather with us at the World School Family (Beach & Farm) Resort in Portugal


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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

On Instagram, I saw a reel that stated "Myth: Sex is a need. Fact: Sex is a desire, not a need."

"All of us can live without sex; we cannot live without water, food, or belonging."

I had to disagree and responded: "It depends on how you define 'need'. For survival, no. For connection, bonding, and love -- yes, it's a need. Can you imagine if you're husband said, "You don't NEED me to talk to you. It's just a desire' and then went days, weeks, or months without talking because it's not a 'need'? You would feel pretty neglected. So if you want an extraordinary relationship then sex -- and talking -- are NEEDS.'



While the argument may be true that 'needs' are ONLY things that we can't live without -- water, food, belonging -- it's inaccurate when we're talking about the surviving -- not to mention the THRIVING -- of our marriage relationship.

Yes, people can live without sex. And talking. But an extraordinary marriage cannot.

Of course, there are extremes when sex in marriage is not an option (injury, postpartum, old age). But we're not talking about those rare instances. We're talking about marriages where couples CAN have sex but are NOT having it.

And I get it. As a woman who once *hoped* to find evidence that would convince my husband we never had to have sex again, I know how relieving it can be to believe that his need for sex is not real or is some how wrong or unrealistic.

But it's just not true. Men (and women) want and need intimacy, but for some (usually men) their deepest intimacy takes the form of sex. And that's OK! And when you learn to use both sex and communication together they create an eternal circle of connection between spouses.

Listen to this episode now so you can begin to see sex as an OPPORTUNITY for connection, not a burden or obligation. When you have this paradigm shift then everything changes. And you finally discover the key to building the relationship you've always wanted.



This topic is further expounded on with these episodes:


#148 What Wives Need to Know about Husbands' (Sex Drive) and What Men Need to Understand about Themselves
#150 The Sex-quel. Follow-up Sex Episode with Rachel Denning
#151 What Husbands NEED to Know About their Wives
#224 How (& WHY) to Have Sex 3-6 Times a Week EVEN with Kids, Businesses, Homeschool, Jobs, Activities, and More
Masturbation & Cheap Sexual Acts are a Poor Substitute for Real Connection 



ADDITIONAL RESOURCES:

Let us help you in your growth journey.


Download the ⁠Be The Man app on iOS⁠ or ⁠Android⁠
Take the ⁠Be The Man 7-Day Challenge.⁠
Get Rachel's ⁠Family Systems & Charts⁠
Join the ⁠28-Day Challenge⁠ for Moms
Join the ⁠Be The Man Coaching & Tribe⁠
⁠Rachel’s Must-Read Booklist for Well-Read Moms
⁠Greg's Recommended Reading List for Parents & Youth
Gather with us at the World School Family (Beach & Farm) Resort in Portugal


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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message

A member of my 28-Day Challenge coaching program asked:

"I'm curious: what do your kids do for work or how do they learn work ethic? Our oldest is almost 16 and starting a job this summer which is flexible (thank goodness) but as much as she and our family go places we are trying to make sure we're home for part of the summer so she can get hours at that job and earn some money!

I know there are ways to earn outside a typical job: do you have a list of ideas for me? We considered selling some of her crafty works on Etsy and she's done babysitting jobs, but I don't see those online options really "paying off". When we consider doing yard work for others or house cleaning etc, I wonder how safe that is for her to go into homes alone...

...and I feel like our summers will be eaten up soon by our older kids trying to hold down jobs. My spouse feels it's so important for them to learn how to work for someone and they can work during the school year, but it would have to be a REALLY flexible employer. ;) I'd love any insight you (or others!) have."

And...

"Greg said once that his children WILL be wealthy when they grow up. What is it that gives him that kind of confidence (without of course giving them the money!😄)?

What books have you read and are teaching concepts to your kids or having your kids read? I know you guys do things the "non-traditional" way, so maybe there's more there that I don't know about...

It seems that most parents send their kids off into the world and tell them they have to work hard and hope they survive financially. I imagine our kids will struggle at times but that provides good and healthy lessons for them - do you include that part of growth on their own as something they will experience before they reach "wealthy"?

And if they don't go the traditional route with jobs, what are they doing to create that wealth? Wealth isn't everything, but money is a necessary tool in our world and his comment just got me thinking...

Along these lines, what are your thoughts on Dave Ramsey's teachings, like 'The Total Money Makeover'? (It's not on Greg's list under business/money.) Tell me more! :)"



Fantastic and very relevant questions for anyone who is raising children, which we answer in this episode in surprising ways -- such as discouraging our children from getting jobs, encouraging them to BECOME, buy, and acquire assets, and teaching them money psychology, wealth and abundance mindsets, and how to be entrepreneurs and investors.

We also address the potential dangers of youth going into homes alone -- and how to protect against it. PLUS better ways to teach children and teens 'work ethic' and to do hard things.

And we talk about how programs like Dave Ramsey's are geared toward obtaining or maintaining the middle class -- not toward creating generational wealth.

Don't miss this powerful episode that could alter your family's finances for generations to come.



RESOURCES:


The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace Wattles ("You have a moral obligation to be wealthy")
Money: Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom by Tony Robbins

Get our recommended book lists (including more on money psychology, abundance, and wealth):


Rachel’s ⁠Must-Read Booklist for Well-Read Moms⁠
⁠Greg's ⁠Recommended Reading List for Parents & Youth⁠

Let us help you in your growth journey.


Download the ⁠Be The Man app on iOS⁠ or ⁠Android⁠
Take the ⁠Be The Man 7-Day Challenge.⁠
Get Rachel's ⁠Family Systems & Charts⁠
Join the ⁠28-Day Challenge⁠ for Moms
Join the ⁠Be The Man Coaching & Tribe⁠


Gather with us or attend retreats at the World School Family (Beach & Farm) Resort in Portugal




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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/extraordinary-family-life/message