010 Noticing and Responding To Our Feelings With Tim Carr Human Reboot

Tim Carr Tim shares how his life has been very different since his partner died of cancer about 11 years ago. It was at the point that he died that he realised that he had continued to work flat out. It was a stark realisation that he'd not really kept things in perspective. Tim talks about really understanding yourself, and knowing what your own habits are, and taking time to notice your feelings. He chats about when he had a bone disease as a child and couldn’t walk for a couple of years, how he felt different to the other kids and was bullied ‘called a Puff’ way before he realised he was gay.  We cover so much in this podcast -how Tim now identifies as white cis-male and queer, feminine attributes, human connection and leadership, genuinely caring for employees, female leadership, self reflection versus self absorption, competence, behaviours, values, buddhism, our feelings and emotions and being in the moment.
 
#leadership #feelings #lgbtqia+ #takenotice #female leadership #thebigshift
KEY LEARNS 
“I think that my journey of life has been filled with all sorts of times when I have felt very vulnerable. But I don't think that makes me special. I think that makes me insightful’
 
“I'm very strongly of the opinion that all that's wrong with society is that women are derided consistently. So if I have these attributes that are associated with being feminine, then I stand up absolutely as a queer. And I will be counted amongst other queers because we need to change society”
 
“The work that you're doing is really important, because we've had a global reboot, but what I'm noticing in businesses and organisations is that most people are desperate to get back to how things used to be. And if people in business, leaders and managers don't understand that being able to form a powerful human connection, to be able to form trust. If you don't get that, that's your priority, you're going to have a huge number of very disenfranchised and angry people who are no longer willing to put up with that status quo that they might have done before COVID. We're going to say no your behaviour, your attitude. Your politics and the culture that you've created Mr. And Mrs. Leader -This isn't what I want.”
 
“I had to catch up with somebody that I worked with in 1992. We've remained friends for years. And we were both in agreement that the biggest tragedy of our society is that perimenopausal women with all of that IP, all of that knowledge, unplug from corporate organisations because they’ve had enough and  they go and set up on their own, which is fantastic for them. And it's fantastic for their clients. But it's an absolute tragedy for the hundreds of 1000s of employees in organisations that are crying out for the types of cultures that senior female executives will create, because women create a very different type of culture in a business”
 
“ no one can make another person feel anything. What you're feeling is yours alone. And it's a choice. So when we learn that, and we can start by using a tool like the emotions wheel, and we can go right, what's the feeling? Where do I feel it in my body? On a scale of one to 10? How, how powerful is that feeling? And if I'm feeling overwhelmed by that feeling, what could what one small thing could I do to reduce that feeling”
RECOMMENDATIONS
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R.Covey https://amzn.to/2SNxZkU
Living like you mean it by Ronald j.Frederick https://amzn.to/3zOy4oL
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman https://amzn.to/3zPcIYs
Self Compassion by Kristin Neff https://amzn.to/35H0GCP
Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend https://amzn.to/2SSEW3S
 
If you like this episode listen to bullied to breathing for the first time at age 25
https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/human-reboot/id1567430905?i=1000522260752
ABOUT TIM
Tim lives in Leeds in the UK identifies as white, cis male and queer. Tim is a trained Hospi