The Divorce Podcast is a new podcast dedicated to looking at divorce from new perspectives, and driving reform. Hosted by Kate Daly, each episode invites experts from a variety of backgrounds and disciplines to discuss their own views on divorce, and debate them with the other guests.
Episode #60: Part two of divorce myth-busting with #thelegalqueen
In this second myth-busting episode, Kate was joined by Tracey Moloney, known to many as The Legal Queen on Tiktok and other social media platforms.
This is the second time Tracey has joined Kate on the podcast, so if you haven’t already, listen to their first episode (#58). For a number of years, she worked exclusively with clients that qualified for legal aid and specialised in children and financial matters following separation and divorce. She was Head of the Family Department for a nationwide legal firm, where she was responsible for a team of 28 legal advisors. Tracey trained solicitors in her role as training principal and is an associate lecturer in family law at the University of Bristol. She aims to provide a clear explanation of people’s legal rights and help them to navigate the legal system. She shares her knowledge on TikTok, Instagram and YouTube as 'The Legal Queen' on all matters related to Family law.
They spent this episode busting common divorce and separation myths such as; whether divorces will be automatic with the introduction of no-fault divorce, whether you ‘need’ to split your pensions or inheritance when you separate, why you may need to disclose your finances on divorce and myths around children and custody. This episode covered the most commonly asked questions about divorce and separation in easy digestible snippets. Watch this space for future myth-busting episodes.
You might be able to hear Tracey's dog in this episode!
Episode #59: Dads, separation and divorce
In this episode, Kate was joined by James Hayhurst and Adam Colthorpe to discuss Dads and divorce or separation.
James is the founder of the Positive Parenting Alliance and creator of the Parents Promise. He has a background in Marketing and PR but was compelled to set up the Positive Parenting Alliance having seen up close the multitude of issues in the family courts and the scale and numbers of children affected. James wanted to begin a new conversation about separation and so in May 2021, after many conversations with like-minded people and organisations the Parents Promise was launched. Backed by over 20 organisations including Only Mums & Dads, the children’s mental health charity Place2Be, Relate, Black Mums Upfront and our very own amicable, the aim of the Alliance is to effect important cultural change around separation in the UK and beyond.
Adam is the Director of Co-parenting for Dads Unlimited, a men’s mental health charity working with fathers who have gone through family separation and male victims of domestic abuse to help improve the outcomes for the men and the people they care for. He is the author and facilitator of the Co-parenting Programme ‘5 Steps to Co-parenting Success!’ which has been improving the lives of separated families for the last 4 years. He has two children which he co-parents with his ex-wife.
This episode started with Kate, James and Adam looking at some typical issues faced by Dads following on from a divorce or separation. What emerged was a clear set of gender-specific issues, routed in society, and a real need for reform, particularly in the workplace. They also explored the value of early intervention and limiting the negative impact of separation on families and children in particular.
Episode #58: Myth-busting with #thelegalqueen
In this first myth-busting episode, Kate was joined by Tracey Moloney, known to many as The Legal Queen on Tiktok and other social media platforms.
For a number of years, she worked exclusively with clients that qualified for legal aid and specialised in children and financial matters following separation and divorce. She was Head of the Family Department for a nationwide legal firm, where she was responsible for a team of 28 legal advisors. Tracey trained solicitors in her role as training principal and is an associate lecturer in family law at the University of Bristol. She aims to provide a clear explanation of people’s legal rights and help them to navigate the legal system. She shares her knowledge on TikTok, Instagram and YouTube as 'The Legal Queen' on all matters related to Family law.
They spent this episode busting common divorce and separation myths such as whether or not you need a solicitor to get divorced, when a financial order is needed in divorce proceedings, if common-law spouses exist and whether cohabiting couples have rights to property. This is part one of two myth-busting episodes, so keep an eye out for part two.
Episode #57: Divorce and separation from the child's perspective
In this episode, Kate was joined by Dr Angharad Rudkin a clinical psychologist with over 20 years experience of working with children and families to discuss divorce and separation from the perspective of children.
Angharad is also an expert for the Metro's relationship column, offers training and consultation for family lawyers and worked as a lecturer on the Clinical Psychology doctorate at the University of Southampton for 12 years. Angharad was consulting editor for ‘101 Questions Answered about Separating with Children’ and has recently published a book for children on how to cope with their parent’s divorce, The Split Survival Kit, written with children’s author Ruth Fitzgerald. Angharad is also passionate about communicating her work and believes key messages around child and family wellbeing should not be limited to the clinic room or the classroom.
In the episode, Kate and Angharad explored how children of different ages and genders deal with divorce and separation and the delayed impact this can have in their later life. Angharad explained the idea of ‘re-grieving’ and the benefits revisiting a separation can have for children, even years later. They also looked at the different types of conflict and how in all its forms this can have a significant impact on children. They discussed the importance of including the other parent in your child’s life, even if they are no longer physically present. Finally, Angharad set out some useful tips on effective ways to tell your children that you’re separating, why parents often experience ‘guilt’ after they separate and what society should be doing in the future to redress the stigma that exists around parental separation.
Click on the link to find out more about Angharad's new book 'The Split Survival Kit: 10 Steps For Coping With Your Parents' Separation'.
Episode #56: Samantha Baines
In this episode, Kate was joined by comedian, actor and broadcaster Samantha Baines to discuss her divorce.
Sam is an award-winning comedian, actor and broadcaster with many shows and appearances to her credit including The Crown, Call the midwife and Magic Mike Live. She is also the host of The Divorce Social podcast and has written for various publications including The Guardian, Time Out, Huffington Post, Stylist Magazine, The Pool, Standard Issue and has a column in Modern Woman Magazine. Sam’s debut children's book Harriet Versus the Galaxy was listed in the Independent's Best Children's Books of the Year 2019 and in the Book Trust's Great Book Guide 2020. She has a second children's book The Night the Moon Went Out which was released last summer. Sam is also an Ambassador for Royal National Institute for Deaf people, is a Phonak HEARo and has spoken to MPs at the House of Commons about hearing issues, as well as fronting the RNID cinema subtitles campaign.
Kate and Sam began by exploring her separation which started off on an amicable footing but turned sour during divorce proceedings when solicitors got involved and two sides were created. Sam opened up about how difficult she found the initial aftermath and emotional fallout after her husband left and the difficulties the pandemic brought to the process. They looked at the challenges of healing after divorce as well as how rewarding Sam found it was to rediscover herself through working, sex, dating and self-exploration after the divorce. Sam discussed her own journey with her mental health and how she has found both therapy and medication useful in helping her to cope. Finally, they talked about Sam's wonderful podcast The Divorce Social which she created in part to help with her own emotional recovery and is a fantastic resource for others going through a similar thing.
Episode #55: Sara Davison on navigating the emotional journey of divorce and separation
In this episode, Kate was joined by Sara Davison, to discuss navigating the emotional process of divorce, separation and breakups.
Sara is best known as The Divorce Coach but she’s also a best-selling author and worldwide media commentator on the topic of divorce and separation. As an NLP Master Practitioner, Sara combines 26 years’ coaching experience with her own personal experience of marriage breakdown to help clients cope with challenges including heartbreak, betrayal, conflict, confidence building, co-parenting, being effective in the workplace during divorce and dating again. Sara also hosts her own podcast, Heartbreak To Happiness, designed to help men and women struggling with the pain of relationship breakdown.
In the episode, they begin by discussing the different types of divorce coaching all the way from amicable, which helps couples navigate the legal and financial process of divorce, to coaches like Sara, who help with the emotional and practical process of picking up your life after a breakup. They explored Sara’s own difficult journey through divorce which has shaped her career as a divorce coach. She offered some fantastic tips in terms of approaching divorce and stressed the importance of dealing with your current emotional state, but also looking to the future to help set yourself up in the best way possible. They also discussed the various flaws in the legal system and the need for future reform, particularly around children’s proceedings. This episode is full of helpful advice if you are confronted with a divorce, separation or breakup and aren’t sure where to start in terms of the emotional journey.