Happy Life incmedia.org

Marriage Benefits-We Don't Just Date For Fun







[Show Opens]







Myrtle Alegado: Do you remember when you began to seriously consider getting married? On today’s episode, we’ll talk to newlyweds who will share the progression in their relationship, from meeting, to courtship, and finally to marriage.







Welcome to Happy Life, a podcast brought to you by INC Media Audio that aims to help newlyweds navigate through the first years of marriage. I’m your host, Myrtle Alegado, and I’ve been married to my husband, Paul, since 1999. Later, we'll hear some Bible-based advice through Brother Felmar Serreno, a minister of the gospel in the Church Of Christ.







[Show Catchphrase]







Inspiration to make your marriage thrive, you’re listening to Happy Life







Myrtle: Today, I'd like to welcome our newlyweds from Yorba Linda, California to the podcast. Thanks so much for joining us on Happy Life, Aedelbert and Darlene!







Darlene Alejandro: Thank you for having us, Myrtle.







Aedelbert Alejandro: Hello! Thank you for having us.







Myrtle: How are you both doing today?







Darlene: We’re good.







Aedelbert: Doing good.







Myrtle: Well, as I understand it, you got married in January of this year, right?







Aedelbert: Correct.







Darlene: Yes.







Myrtle: Oh, well,congratulations to you both! Now, how did you both meet?







Aedelbert: So I moved to the Bay Area to finish college at San Francisco State University, and Darlene actually came up to me at one of our church events. It was a coastal cleanup. And, you know, I was hanging out with my guy friends, and Darlene came out of nowhere and just introduced herself to me.







Darlene: Yeah. [laughs]







Myrtle: Is that how you remember it, Darlene? Give us your take.







Darlene: Yeah, he was new to Daly City local congregation. And it was about a month before I met him that he was already living in Daly City. And normally when someone new or a new member [of the Church Of Christ] comes into Daly City, I usually meet them just to welcome them. I didn't meet him yet, so when I saw him at the coastal cleanup, yeah, I just went up to him and I was like, “Hi, I'm Darlene. I haven't met you yet, but welcome to Daly City.”







Myrtle: Aww. Well, that's cute, Darlene!







Darlene: Yes, so I went up to him at the coastal cleanup. And then maybe a couple days after that, one of our mutual friends on Instagram posted a picture of their friend group, and that person tagged him. Since I met him, I figured, “Okay, I can follow him now.”







And then fast forward a couple more days, he posted this story about working out and he asked, “Who wants to be my workout buddy?” Mind you, I did not work out at that time but something inside me was like, “I'm going to respond and I'm going to say I'm going to be his workout buddy.” And that's where we started talking or messaging with each other.







Aedelbert: Yeah, so after Darlene replied to my story and she said, you know, “I'll be your workout buddy,” we actually planned to hang out one day. And you know, one thing led to another, we started texting more, and started hanging out more. That led to me falling for Darlene,

Supporting Each Other in a Health Crisis







[Show opens]







Myrtle Alegado: A health or medical crisis can have a significant impact on any marriage, but perhaps even more-so for newlyweds. You're still finding your footing early on in your marriage, so how do you ensure you support each other enough to help each other get through this ordeal? We'll find out about Joel and Richelle’s experience in today's episode.







Welcome to Happy Life, a podcast brought to you by INC Media Audio that aims to help newlyweds navigate through the first years of marriage. I'm your host, Myrtle Alegado, and I've been married to my husband, Paul, since 1999. Later, we'll hear some Bible-based advice through Brother Felmar Serreno, a minister of the gospel in the Church Of Christ.







[Show Catchphrase]







Inspiration to make your marriage thrive, you're listening to Happy Life.







Myrtle: Because the topic of discussion today is an extremely sensitive one, and I know it may be difficult to talk about, I am so appreciative of Richelle and Joel, from London, who are here to chat with me today. Welcome to the Happy Life podcast, Joel and Richelle.







Joel Dela Cruz: Hello.







Richelle Dela Cruz: Hi. Hi, Myrtle. How are you?







Myrtle: I'm good. How are things over there, over the pond?







Joel: We’re good. Thank you very much. Thank you for having us.







Myrtle: So you two have been married for how long now?







Joel: Coming up to three years in September.







Myrtle: Oh, wow! Congratulations. So, now tell me about finding out that you were expecting your baby boy, Noah.







Joel: So, we weren't really planning. We just left it up to God and if He blessed us with a child, He blessed us. So, we weren't really actively trying to have a baby or conceive at the time.







Richelle: Yeah, so you can say that we were surprised when we found out. Actually I was the first one who found out. I realized it because that day, it was during the pandemic, and I was working from home and I don't usually eat junk food. But I realized I finished, like, a bag of crisps, or chips for America. I finished a whole bag and then I looked at it and I was like, “What's happening?” And then I messaged him, I was like, “Can you actually buy a test?” and when he came home, I tested and we actually filmed ourselves. And yeah, we were really surprised. We were really scared. It's something that we didn't expect, and we felt we weren't ready for it at that time.







Myrtle: But it was God's perfect time, right? [laughs]







Joel and Richelle: Yes.







Myrtle: And what was your pregnancy like?







Richelle: So my pregnancy went very well, if I can say that. Every stage of my pregnancy, from the moment that we found out that we were pregnant, to finding out the gender, up to the due date, we tried everything that we could to prepare ourselves. So, not just physically for me, mentally, and even more so spiritually. We held our devotional prayers, and I did some exercises as much as I could, tried to eat healthily.







Myrtle: So up until the delivery, was everything pretty normal with your pregnancy?

Young Newlywed Entrepreneurs







[Show opens]







Myrtle Alegado: They say that compared to older generations, young people can be very optimistic. They're full of energy and often come up with fresh ideas because they aren't always set in their ways. What does this have to do with today's topic? Stay tuned and find out.







Welcome to Happy Life, a podcast brought to you by INC Media Audio that aims to help newlyweds navigate through the first years of marriage. I'm your host, Myrtle Alegado, and I've been married to my husband, Paul, since 1999. And later, we'll hear some Bible-based advice through Brother Felmar Serreno, a minister of the gospel in the Church Of Christ.







[Show Catchphrase]







Inspiration to make your marriage thrive, you're listening to Happy Life.







Myrtle: The willingness of the youth to try new things, coupled with their ability to quickly adapt to new technologies, make them natural leaders in the ever-developing small business climate. Our newlywed couple today are really quite young, but they're also aspiring entrepreneurs. Let's welcome Kegan and Ailafaye to Happy Life. Hello, you two. Kegan and Ailafaye Baker: Hello!







Myrtle: Both of you are still quite young. What made you decide that this is the right time to get married, and would you mind telling us how old you both are?







Kegan Baker: We're both 21 and we started dating when we were 18. Her parents were very strict. They had a lot of rules. We wanted to gain their trust. We had to be home at a certain time, very early in the night, like eight o'clock. We would rush home at like 6:30. We were like, “Oh we gotta get home. We don't want to get her parents to be mad at us. And we wanted to avoid temptations and to be careful.







We saw, like, a lot of people our age going out and doing things that weren't necessarily appropriate for Church Of Christ members, especially like later on in the night they’d go clubbing and things like that, or they’d go travel together and they're not married. And we wanted to avoid that as much as possible, because we are members of the Church [Of Christ]. We want God's blessing in everything that we do.







We wanted to also go and travel the world together, to embark on a new journey, and get to know each other better. So, that's why we decided to get married so early on, and we wanted to just start our lives together.







Ailafaye Baker: Aside from my parents, we had a lot of help from the brethren within the Church. One of the brethren was Brother Ricky Bravo, who's a minister in the Church Of Christ, and his wife, Sister May Bravo. So we would go over there for dinner, and they are a couple that we really really trust because, truthfully, they remind us a lot about ourselves. They shared stories with us that they're actually the opposite of us. Sister May and Brother Ricky Bravo, they got married later on in life, and she actually shared with me that they got criticized for being a lot older.







They always had their home open for us whenever we needed any type of guidance. That's why we developed a good relationship with them. Since he's a minister in the Church, we would always be comfortable enough to ask him questions and advice. He would share [with] us the words of Almighty G...

Cross Border Love During a Pandemic







[Show Opens]







Myrtle Alegado: With today's technology the world doesn't seem so large, and we can easily connect with friends and family. It has even made it easier to find a romantic love interest across borders, or even across the world, and stay in a long-distance relationship. We'll discuss more about this in our episode today.







Welcome to Happy Life, a podcast brought to you by INC Media Audio that aims to help newlyweds navigate through the first years of marriage. I'm your host, Myrtle Alegado, and I've been married to my husband, Paul, since 1999. And later, we'll hear some Bible-based advice through Brother Felmar Serreno, a minister of the gospel in the Church Of Christ.







[Show Catchphrase]







Inspiration to make your marriage thrive, you're listening to Happy Life.







Myrtle: Our newlyweds, for this Happy Life episode, are a long-distance, cross border, transnational love story success! Zachary is originally from Toronto, Canada, and Isabelle is from the Bay Area of Northern California.







Thanks for agreeing to chat with us today on Happy Life, Zach and Isabelle.







Zachary Sese: Hello, Myrtle. Hello, everyone. Thank you.







Isabelle Sese: Hi, Myrtle. Thank you for having us.







Myrtle: So how was your day today?







Zachary: Not bad. We're here traveling towards an area in Wyoming, a long drive.







Isabelle: Yeah, it was a long drive. This is our seventh state in the past seven days.







Zachary: We've traveled seven states in seven days, yeah.







Myrtle: Wow! Well, we appreciate that you're joining us today, despite your traveling, and despite all the distance that you've logged on your car probably.







So we've had a lot of previous Happy Life guests who were also in long-distance relationships before marriage, but we haven't really discussed, in depth, the challenges of being in one. Why don't you two share how you met, and how you got engaged, and of course eventually married.







Zachary: Before we were married, we were actually both District KADIWA presidents. It's an organization in the Church Of Christ for the youth that's aged 18 and up who aren’t married. In 2018, we had a KadCon. This is a conference for those members within that organization. I was actually District KADIWA vice president at the time. Part of this activity is that we recorded something with KADIWA officers all across North America, and these videos would be shown to every local [congregation] across the world.







Through these videos, that's where I actually noticed Isabelle in one of the videos. I guess she definitely caught my eye. I started to like her from those videos. So, I guess you could say I was a fan of her, but I mentioned to a friend of mine that I thought she was cute, she was pretty. And it turned out that Isabelle had actually visited Toronto recently to attend a wedding, and the friend that I mentioned to had actually met Isabelle. So yes, it was actually interesting. We actually had mutual friends already.







Myrtle: That's so cool.







Isabelle: Yeah, so two months after that KadCon, late 2018 so probably late December and even early January 2019, the friend that Zach told that I was cute, shout out to Chryselle, she actually messaged me.

Age Gaps In Marriage







[Show opens]







Myrtle Alegado: When you hear that someone you know is dating an older person, perhaps several years older. What goes through your mind? Do you form an opinion either way about their relationship because of a potential generational gap. Let's see how the discussion unfolds today with our newlyweds with an age gap.







Welcome to Happy Life, a podcast brought to you by INCMedia Audio that aims to help newlyweds navigate through the first years of marriage. I'm your host, Myrtle Alegado, and I've been married to my husband, Paul, since 1999. Later, we'll hear some Bible-based advice through Brother Felmar Serreno, a minister of the gospel in the Church Of Christ.







[Show catchphrase]







Inspiration to make your marriage thrive, you're listening to Happy Life.







Myrtle Alegado: As mentioned earlier, our newlywed couple today has an age gap that might even be considered a generational gap as well. Jasmine and Mac are from Winnipeg, Canada. Hi, you two, and welcome to Happy Life.







Jasmine Balacano: Hi!







Mac Balacano: Hi there.







Myrtle Alegado: How's Winnipeg life at the moment?







Jasmine Balacano: Pretty muddy, rainy. Not bad. [laughs]







Myrtle Alegado: It's rainy here too, but, you know, such is the case with our west coast city. So when did you both get married, and how have you been enjoying married life since then?







Jasmine Balacano: We got married last year, May 2021, during the pandemic. We had a pretty serious lockdown at the time, and it was very stressful. We had to change the wedding date about three or four times.







Myrtle Alegado: Oh, wow.







Jasmine Balacano: Yeah, and we were only allowed to have 10 people at the wedding. So, yup. [laughs]







Mac Balacano: Yeah, and it's  been a very busy year for us. I can't even believe it's been one year. I often joke with people that I feel like in 2021 I got a new life. We got married, [and] I ended up getting a new job. So, working in a new industry, building a new team, new processes and things like that. So work’s been very busy. We also got a new dog, Loki, who is a puppy. He's almost one now, but you know around that time when we first got him, he [was] obviously quite the handful. So life's been very busy, but of course we've been enjoying every moment of it.







Myrtle Alegado: I mean, all of that, plus a pandemic going on still. You know, I can imagine how, you know, hectic and intense the first year has been for you two. And I know other newlyweds can relate to how chaotic the first months can be.







So I know you have an age gap, and I won't mention exactly how many years. Let's just say that Jasmine's in her 20s and Mac’s in his 30s. What did you like about each other in the beginning, despite the age gap?







Mac Balacano: You know for me, when I first met Jasmine, it was really just that our conversation clicked. You know, at that time, when even reflecting back on when I was talking to other people or getting to know people, you know, there's always something kind of missing. And with Jasmine that was never the case. Our conversations just clicked, they flowed, they were very natural. We often talk about how we're best friends,

Managing Time as a Married Couple







[Show opens]







Myrtle Alegado: With the many demands on our daily lives, newly married couples struggle in balancing their time between work, daily tasks, and other obligations. When we find ourselves very busy, is it still a reasonable goal to achieve work-life balance?







Today on the show, we’ll chat with a newlywed couple from Burlingame, California, to talk about how they make time for each other despite their busy schedules, while still prioritizing what truly matters in their relationship.







Welcome to Happy Life, a podcast brought to you by INC Media Audio that aims to help newlyweds navigate through the first years of marriage. I’m your host, Myrtle Alegado, and I’ve been married to my husband, Paul, since 1999. Later, we'll hear some Bible-based advice through Brother Felmar Serreno, a minister of the gospel in the Church Of Christ.







[Show catchphrase]







Inspiration to make your marriage thrive, you’re listening to Happy Life







Myrtle: On Happy Life today, I’d like to welcome Paolo & Rachelle from Burlingame, California, and they’ve been married since August of 2021.







Hey there, Paolo & Rachelle!  Thanks so much for agreeing to chat with us today.







Rachelle de Dios: Hi!







Paolo de Dios: Hello!







Myrtle: How are you both doing?







Rachelle: We’re good. Happy to be here.







Myrtle: Oh, well, we're so glad you joined us. Can you tell us a little bit about yourselves and how you both met?







Paolo: Sure. Rachelle and I, we first met at a Church activity. It was August 2018, and it was a career fair for the Kadiwa [youth in the Church Of Christ aged 18 and up who are unmarried] members. She had just moved from Detroit about a month before that, and, you know, I'm sure she was still learning a lot about the new areas and things like that. Maybe it was coincidence, but yeah, we met through that activity and just kind of went from it.







Rachelle: Yeah, I was new, moving to California. So I was just kind of nervous about everything. But I remember when we were going through some of the notes for this career fair, I was like, “Oh, Paolo’s kind of cute.” I actually knew what to do with all the instructions of this career fair, but I pretended to not know much. So, I was messaging him like, “What are we supposed to wear? What do you mean for this job thing? What do we do?” I kind of just initiated the chatting.







Myrtle: Look at you being sneaky! Way to go for what you want. [laughs]







Rachelle: Woo!







Myrtle: Did you know that she already knew the answers, Paolo, but messaged you on the side just to have an excuse, I guess, to talk to you? Did you know that?







Paolo: Honestly, no. I think when she was messaging me, I thought, like, “Wow, I can really impress her.” You know, “I can tell her exactly what we need to do here. She needs my help.” You know, “I'm going to be that person to support her in her time of need.” But you know, she's smart.







Myrtle: But how long were you two talking before things became serious, and then when did you get engaged, and finally married? Rachelle: I want to say talking for about three or four months, and then when we got engaged, a year and a half to two years.