It's Your Business Lead it Dr Ron Hurst

okay folks this is the "official" last episode of the verbal judo series. However, as i was recording these episodes i realized that there were three other smaller techniques that i wanted to cover but they didn't warrant episodes on their own. And i don't like doing an even numbered series so no episode 8! However, if you want this off the books episode, if you join my mailing list at Developing Leaders I will send it to you. All you need do is send me an email at ronh@developingleadersinc.com with off the books VJ episode in the subject line. I will take care of the rest!

Continuing our series on verbal judo, today we discuss the idea of abstracting up. Language is funny. There is concrete tangible language (words like dog, sidewalk, tree, table) and then there are these words that are abstract more idea or category based (canine, walking routes, forest, furniture). Where you can picture the first category of words in your mind easily, the second not so much or at least less so. Knowing the difference here is incredibly helpful when you face a problem in a conversation where you reach an impasse or roadblock. Often it feels impossible to solve the problem, navigate the conversation. However, if we learn to move up a level of abstraction, we gain the ability to engage with a wider conversational field. This wider field is still talking about the very same topic, it just offers us the ability to find new ways to navigate the conversation.

Here we are at part 5 in our series on verbal judo. Today change the tense. This will be a familiar topic for long time listeners as it was featured in the influence series back in July of 2022. But this cast goes a bit deeper into application. We cover more on when this technique is helpful and how to use it effectively to gain the space to navigate a difficult conversation.

Communication might seem simple, but the simplicity on the far side of complexity is my favorite. Simple unaware communication (or communication on the ignorant side of complexity), leads to less than outcomes. When we learn to understand how communication works, notice what is going on then have the skills needed to mold and shape it, we can create optimal outcomes. That is the heart of the argument behind the power of this weeks cast. Changing the frame is a powerful approach to guiding and shaping a conversation. Knowing how to do this requires a significant awareness and the ability to be conversationally flexible. Frames set the boundaries of a conversation. Recognize that once it is set, it becomes challenging to change it. In this cast we examine when and how to change or reset the fame.

In part 3 we explore how introducing process can not only save time and aggravation, it can provide you the ability to influence the effectiveness of the people and groups you interact with. This technique done well requires preparation as it is a highly proactive approach to communication. Trust me practice it and you will see a significant benefit in your group interactions

In our continuing series on verbal judo, this week we examine how to leverage we, us, and our to connect ourselves with another person in conversation. This simple subtle technique will help position your language as a collaboration rather than a confrontation and is incredibly powerful. Fortunately it is also very easy to practice and see results quickly