Bobblehead Dad Parenting Jim Higley

Take a close look at your child’s class picture. If there’s 25 cute, smiling faces in that group, statistically about seven of those kids are being raised by single parents. Maybe more depending on where you live.

Of the 30-40 million homes in the United States with children under the age of 18, about 30% of them are led by single parents. Mostly moms. But the population of single dads raising kids alone is rising.

That makes for a lot of kids being raised by single parents.

And according to the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, those children born or raised outside of marriage are more likely to suffer from a range of emotional and social problems – including drug use, depression, attempted suicide and dropping out of high school – compared to children in intact, married families.

“We still find that happy marriage has some benefits,” says UVa psychology professor Robert Emery in a recent article in The Daily Progress. “But the ‘happy’ part is important. Children raised in relatively happy, well-functioning single-parent families will do better than children with unhappily married parents.”

As a single parent raising three kids myself, that’s good to hear.

So how do us single parents make sure we’re running a “relatively happy, well-functioning” family?

Dr. Wendy Rice of Rice Psychology Group in the Tampa Bay area offered these five tips:  

1. Be aware that you are under a lot of stress and be careful to support yourself. Think of the analogy of putting on an oxygen mask on an airplane. You have to put on your own before you can help someone else, even your child. Taking care of yourself will help you to be a better single parent. Every method we use to combat our stress is technically a coping mechanism; however, some are adaptive or good while others are maladaptive or bad. Stress prevention strategies include having a regular daily routine for predictability, finding ways in your day to get up and move and be active, and simplifying necessary activities such as making lunches the night before a busy school morning.

2. Say what you mean and mean what you say. When you’re a single parent, if you don’t follow through on your word, your child will quickly learn to push for you to give in. And you can’t afford that when you don’t have someone to partner with you on a regular basis on parenting responsibilities. Set clear rules and expectations and be careful to enforce them.

3. Teach your children independence and responsibility. Your child should understand that your family is a team by designating age-appropriate responsibilities such as cleaning up their toys, pick out their own clothes, and clean their room.

4. Seek help! Maintain a social support network so that you have a few caring adults in you and your child’s life that you can call on when you need help with childcare or unexpected situations. Offer to trade with neighbors or your child’s friend’s parents for babysitting and childcare.

5. Share information with teachers and caregivers. You need these people to be familiar with your family situation so that they can be ready to handle it in a sensitive manner. Make sure your children’s teachers and coaches know important facts, particularly if a parent has passed.

This show is packed with valuable information. I hope you'll stick around!

References from this Podcast:

Dr. Rice's website

  

 

 

Today’s show is sure to do two things: Make you laugh. And make you think about laughing!

We’re talking about the importance of laughing with Dr. Anthony DeBenedet, author of The Art of Roughhousing.

Current research confirms that there are numerous health benefits attributed to laughing including lower blood pressure, increased tolerance to pain and – most importantly – a reduction in stress. As parents, a better understanding of the value of laughing – for ourselves and with our children – can be one more tool to living a happy, healthier life.

Children laugh a lot. About 300 to 400 times a day! The average adult laughs about 20 times a day! We’ll talk about the causes and implications of that dramatic reduction over a typical life. We’ll also discuss:


How simulated laughter provides the same benefits of spontaneous laughter
Why you need to integrate more laughter into your family’s life
How to do a DIY Laughter Festival!
The results you will enjoy if you lighten up and use some humor in your daily interactions
How laughter can be a bonding element between a parent and child
What you can do if you don’t think of yourself as a “funny” person

So stick around. This promises to be a fun time!

References from this Podcast:

Dr. DeBenedet's website

 

 

Here’s a show for all us parents who go bonkers with kids who fight, bicker, argue, and cause constant chaos within our family unit.

We’re joined by Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore, a psychologist, speaker and mom of four! In today’s show, Dr. Kennedy-Moore shares some of the wisdom found in her award-winning (and fun!) book, What About Me? 12 Ways to Get Your Parents Attention Without Hitting Your Sister.

You’ll walk away from today’s show with an abundance of practical knowledge that will help you navigate your role as mom, dad (coach and referee!) including:


Why siblings fight
The importance of giving your kids recognition in addition to attention
How to help your first child adjust to a new sibling
The real implications of birth order
The difference between acceptable conflict and in-home bullying
And you’ll also gain some important advice to to help you with both sides of this issue: prevention and intervention.

So tell the kids to quite down. Here’s 30 minutes of wisdom just for you.

References from this Podcast:

Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore’s website

Dr. Kennedy-Moore’s book

More resources regarding kids who fight

This show will make you think about how you parent.

Lenore Skenazy became a media sensation a few years ago when she published a column describing how she allowed her nine-year old child to ride the New York subway system. Alone. Overnight she became a topic of discussion on television shows, radio call-ins, and parent play groups everywhere. Some viewed her as the World’s Worst Mom. Others viewed her as simply parenting with practical wisdom.  And, thus, Lenore’s “Free-Range Kids” platform was born.

Join in the conversation today as Lenore shares thoughts on what exactly it means to raise “Free-range” kids. She shares insights about just how safe kids really are today (a lot safer than kids were when we were all growing up!), why failure is a good thing, and why it’s critically important for a child to experience their own world without Mom or Dad constantly hovering over them.  Lenore Skenazy and host Jim Higley ask:  How were you brought up?  What kind of supervision did you have?  (What about your parents before you?)  How does your own upbringing differ from that of your children or your parents?

“If we only think of childhood in terms of risk, we’re only thinking about half of the equation, ” explains Skenazy. “You have to think in terms of risk/benefit.” She further shares compelling wisdom about what a child actually loses when a parent places rigid boundaries around their world.  Have you been placing these detrimental types of boundaries on your child?

“Our children are safer and more competent than pop culture wants us to believe,” says Lenore Skenazy.  Are you afraid of your child being abducted?  Of their grades falling behind?  Of them failing in every conceivable way without your constant guidance?  Listen in and hear what Lenore has to say. Even if you don’t agree with everything she has to say, her perspective on parenting will get you thinking!

References from this Podcast:

Free-Range Kids Website

Mike Adamick wants you to have some fun with your kids.

Because fun - and connecting with your kids - is awesome!

Mike stops by Bobblehead Dad Parenting today to talk about his new book, "Dad's Book of Awesome Science Experiments," a collection of 30 fun experients you can do with your kids using inexpensive supplies. 

Why science experiments?

There's real benefits to helping your kids explore the world around them - which Mike breaks into five areas including chemistry, biology, physics, planet earth and the human body. He also offers easy-to-understand explanations for how things work and  what's important to know.

But perhaps more than anything, he reminds us all of the importance of letting kids get their hands dirty, dig into things and - yes - screw up and try again.

Stick around. Science has never been so insightful.

References from this Podcast:

Mike's Website

Mike's Book

 

Fact: 1% of kids in our country save money.

Now that we’ve let that statistic settle in, I’m happy to tell you that there’s hope for all of us who struggle with effective ways to teach our kids about money. As with most things involving kids and lessons, it starts when they are young. And today, we’re going to give parents some terrific advice for helping children have healthy understandings about savings, spending, and charity.

We’re joined by Bill Dwight, founder of FamZoo - an online virtual bank that helps parents teach kids about good personal finance. Bill’s a dad of five kids and, like me, has had plenty of successes and failures when it comes to teaching lessons to kids.

We’ll explore a number of topics that will help all parents develop plans that are best for their family:

• Allowances? The pros and cons.
• Paying for chores?
• Is it more important to understand “real” money or electronic money
• The importance of constraints as it pertains to financial issues
• Teaching kids about charity

This is a fun show. You’ll learn a lot. And the real winners will be your kids who will benefit from your insight into teaching them about personal money management!

References from this Podcast:

FamZoo website