243 episodes

The Empowered Relationship Podcast helps you turn relationship challenges into opportunities and sets you up for relationship success, satisfaction, and intimacy.

This podcast is designed to inspire, motivate, and guide individuals and couples into more empowered, conscious, and evolved ways of loving.

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide Jessica Higgins

    • Relationships

The Empowered Relationship Podcast helps you turn relationship challenges into opportunities and sets you up for relationship success, satisfaction, and intimacy.

This podcast is designed to inspire, motivate, and guide individuals and couples into more empowered, conscious, and evolved ways of loving.

    ERP 243: How To Skillfully Engage In A Conversation To Overcome Conflict In Relationship - An Interview With Kenneth Cloke

    ERP 243: How To Skillfully Engage In A Conversation To Overcome Conflict In Relationship - An Interview With Kenneth Cloke

    Kenneth Cloke talks about how the language we use, the stories we tell, and how we approach our conflicts often have the outcome of making them worse and destroying our relationships. He talks about how to avoid using certain verbiage, so that our partners aren’t triggered to counter-attack. Listen in to our conversation where Ken talks about creating a pivot point in your conversation and having a better outcome and solution with the relational conversation that includes both members of a partnership.
    Kenneth Cloke has devoted much of his career to supporting people in the various negotiation conflict areas and resolving conflict. After a brutal divorce experience and reflection of how he could have handled his personal situation better, Ken was inspired to help others move through their conflict and teach how we can learn and use our own tools to avoid conflict before it starts.
    (Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)
     
    Bio: 
    Kenneth Cloke is a mediator, arbitrator, coach, consultant, and trainer, specializing in resolving complex multi-party disputes, including transnational, marital, divorce, family, grievance, workplace disputes, organizational, and public policy, and school conflicts, and designing preventative conflict resolution systems. He has worked in over 25 countries and is the founder and first President of Mediators Beyond Borders. He has published 15 books on conflict resolution, recently The Crossroads of Conflict and Politics, Dialogue, and the Evolution of Democracy.
    In this episode, Kenneth Cloke and Dr. Jessica Higgins discuss: 
    How to see conflicts differently, as well as how to recognize the source of most of our conflicts.  The importance of looking at the language we use, the stories we tell and the approaches we use that either bring resolution or communication break-down. Identifying the specific words that lead to conflict and destructive cycles in relationship. Learn new language and new questions to ask that create understanding, clear communication and productive outcomes in relationship.  What are the questions we are asking ourselves in every interaction to gauge how safe we are in the relationship. What makes someone an ally versus a threat in relationship. How vulnerable we are within our intimate relationships, what is at stake and and the risks involved.  Learn ways to generate solutions, strengthen relationships and deepen intimacy in communication.  Tweetables
    “I became interested in how to introduce conversations and design them that would help people actually talk through their problems with each other.”
    Kenneth Cloke
     
    “Over the course of the past 40 years I’ve been immersed in working with people to get to places in which they see their conflicts completely differently.”
    Kenneth Cloke
     
    “The language we use, the stories we tell and the way we approach our conflicts often has the outcome of making them worse and destroying our relationships.”
    Kenneth Cloke
     
    “If you use the word ‘you’ in connection with something negative, the form of that pronoun is an accusation.”
    Kenneth Cloke
     
    “Relationships are at stake in every conversation.”
    Kenneth Cloke
    Mentioned:
    The Crossroads of Conflict: A Journey into the Heart of Dispute Resolution by Kenneth Cloke The Dance of Opposites: Explorations in Mediation, Dialogue and Conflict Resolution Systems by Kenneth Cloke Shifting Criticism into Connected Communication – Free Guide Find a mediator online   
    Connect with Kenneth Cloke
     
    Visit Kenneth on the web
     
    Pick up one of Kenneth’s relationship books
     
    Find out more about Kenneth’s trainings he offers
     
    Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  
    Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 
    Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 
    Podcast: d

    • 47 min
    ERP 242: How To Stop Being Attracted To Emotionally Unavailable Partners - An Interview With Ryan Haddon

    ERP 242: How To Stop Being Attracted To Emotionally Unavailable Partners - An Interview With Ryan Haddon

    Suppose you're with an emotionally unavailable partner. In that case, you'll find that you can feel emotionally destabilized at times, that your partner is keeping you at arm's length. You might find that you can't talk deeply about the relationship itself and about what you need and what you want and especially where the two of you as a couple are headed in the future.
    In this episode, I talk with Ryan Haddon, a certified Life, and Spiritual Coach, Hypnotherapist, and certified Meditation teacher. She and I discuss how a person with narcissistic tendencies can emotionally keep you at bay and what you can do to shift your focus if you find yourself in one of these types of relationships.
    (Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)
     
    Bio: 
    Ryan Haddon is a certified Life and Spiritual Coach, Hypnotherapist, and certified Meditation teacher with over 16 years of experience with clients worldwide. A sought-after public speaker for corporate retreats and wellness events, Ryan does private workshops such as “Stepping Into Your Purpose,” “The Work/Life Balance,” and “Finding Your Center.” Ryan was a keynote speaker for Visionary Women’s 2020 virtual event and a featured speaker at CAA’s 2020 global wellness event. She’s also the in-house Life Coach at Kourtney Kardashian’s website Poosh, where she writes mind/body/spirit articles.
    In this episode, Ryan Haddon and I discuss: 
    Why you feel unsafe in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable partner. What does emotional unavailability look like in a partner? Reasons why people are emotionally unavailable. Why you feel lonely, unvalidated and rejected with a partner that’s emotionally unavailable. The checklist of behaviors that emotionally unavailable people tend to display. Why it can feel like you are doing all the heavy lifting inside your relationship. How to figure out what you can do to break the pattern of dating emotionally unavailable people. Tweetables
    “If you’re in a relationship with someone who is emotionally unavailable, you’re most likely feeling destabilized at all times.”
    Ryan Haddon
     
    “When you enter into a relationship with an emotionally unavailable person you’ll feel like you’re not safe.”
    Ryan Haddon
     
    “Knowing that they can’t give you more than they are and if you manage to get past go, your relationship might be well underway and you might feel like you’re dancing all the time, constantly taking their emotional temperature.
    Ryan Haddon
    “Emotional unavailability is a good term to describe when you’re with someone who is always setting the terms, withdrawing physically and emotionally when you get too close, probably because they’re afraid to be vulnerable.”
    Ryan Haddon
    “It feels that one sidedness that you are always having to accept that they’re not really needing you in that same playing field that you want to be in.”
    Ryan Haddon
    Mentioned:
    Get your free guide Relationship Map to Happy Lasting Love Free Guide
    Listen to the podcast episode How To Deal With Fears Of Intimacy
    How To Deal With Fears Of Intimacy - Part Two of the podcast series
    Connect with Ryan Haddon
    Visit Ryan on the web
    Chat with Ryan on Instagram
    Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  
    Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 
    Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 
    Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts 
    Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 
    LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 
    Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 
    Website: drjessicahiggins.com  
    Email: jessica@drjessicahiggins.com
    If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. 
    Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. 
    Also, I would so appreciate

    • 38 min
    ERP 241: How to Prevent Your Smartphone from Hurting your Relationship w/ Dr. Lori Whatley

    ERP 241: How to Prevent Your Smartphone from Hurting your Relationship w/ Dr. Lori Whatley

    Have you sat down to dinner with your partner only to find them on their cell phone most of your time together? Does your significant other consistently bring their computer into the bedroom, and you have a feeling of being dismissed?
    In this episode, I talk with Dr. Lori about the damaging effects of digital devices on relationships. Whether you are interacting with family, friends, or a partner, spending an excessive amount of time and avoiding others instead of interacting with them one-on-one can cause mistrust, a feeling of neglect, and displace couple intimacy.
    (Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)
     
    Bio: 
    With over 25 years of experience, Dr. Lori has worked with thousands of clients, both domestic and internationally. Through her countless hours of research, Dr. Lori’s commitment to helping businesses, families, and individuals overcome the problems created by device usage. Her book, The Effects of Texting on Marital Relationships, offers a poignant data-packed critique on texting within marriage, including its often negative impact.
    In addition to working one-on-one with clients, Dr. Lori advises businesses on the operational effects of over-connected employees, managing technology, distractions in the workplace, and driving employee productivity.
    In this episode, Dr. Lori Whatley and Dr. Jessica Higgins discuss: 
    How device usage can create challenges in relationships. How overuse of technology affects our levels of anxiety, quality of sleep and creates depression. Learn how human contact and in-person interactions affect our mood and brain chemistry. Why it takes up to 25 minutes for us to refocus after a digital distraction. How the amount of digital device usage can cut down on quality family and relationship time. How boundaries and rules can help couples resolve issues with overuse of digital time. How to deal with concerns of device addiction, jealousy and different ways of approaching social media in relationships. Listen in to find out why it's important that we learn to balance our digital devices as a society, the red flags of using too much daily technology, and how digital devices affect our focus. Learn why our attention span is shorter now than ever, how technology can be used as a tool for avoidance in a relationship, and how the overuse of a digital device can create distrust.
    “Everyday as I was working with couples, digital devices came up in our sessions.” by Dr. Lori Whatley
    “The world needs to know how we are effected relationally and individually by our digital device issues.” by Dr. Lori Whatley
    “The effect of technology is truly like another woman or another man in the relationship.” by Dr. Lori Whatley
    “A “like” on social media is not the same as love in person.” by Dr. Lori Whatley
    “Sometimes people fill their life and their hours up with their social media world and then they have no time left for in-person connection .” by Dr. Lori Whatley
    Mentioned:
    Connected and Engaged by Dr. Lori Whatley
    The Effects of Texting on Marital Relationships By Dr. Lori Whatley 
    Family Assessment on Dr. Lori Whatley's website
    ERP 011: How Technological Impacts Our Relationship 
    Connect with Dr. Lori Whatley
    Dr. Whatley on the web
    Get great information on her blog
    Check out her new book Connected & Engaged
    Read The Effects of Texting on the Marital Relationship
    Visit with Dr. Whatley on Instagram
    Chat with Dr. Whatley on Facebook
    Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  
    Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 
    Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 
    Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts 
    Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 
    LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 
    Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 
    Website: drjessicahiggins.com  
    Email: jessica@drjessicahig

    • 35 min
    How To Prevent A Break-up In Your Relationship - An Interview with Chris Seiter

    How To Prevent A Break-up In Your Relationship - An Interview with Chris Seiter

    Bio: 
    Chris Seiter, the founder of Ex Boyfriend Recovery and Ex Girlfriend Recovery has been helping thousands of broken hearted individuals win their exes back for over a decade.
    Implementing the very creative "no contact rule," which shuts down communication between exes for a certain period of time such in order to create space for each partner allows for healing, self recovery, and an opportunity for both of you to potentially come back together as a couple, which Chris believes is the key to long lasting success.
    (Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)
    In this episode, Chris Seiter and Dr. Jessica Higgins discuss: 
    How going through a break-up can be fertile ground for self-development and self-discovery.  What happens when we do not have closure or time to process insights and understandings.  How to use tactical empathy to address other's objections to move through resistance.  What to focus on when communicating (and not through text).  How to get in the right space emotionally.  The importance of giving adequate time, space and distance to reflect.   How to keep the end goal in mind and work towards creating a better relationship.  “It is not about your ex, it is about you.” by Chris Seiter
    Mentioned: 
    Ex Boyfriend Recovery (website) Ex Girlfriend Recovery (website) Ex Boyfriend Recovery (podcast) Ex Girlfriend Recovery (podcast) Shifting Criticism into Connected Communication – Free Guide  
    Connect with Chris Seiter
    Websites:
    www.exboyfriendrecovery.com
    www.exgirlfriendrecovery.com
    Facebook: facebook.com/OfficialExBoyfriendRecovery/
    Youtube: Chris Seiter
    Podcasts: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/podcasts/
     
    Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  
    Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 
    Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 
    Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts 
    Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 
    LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 
    Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 
    Website: drjessicahiggins.com  
    Email: jessica@drjessicahiggins.com
     
     
    If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. 
    Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. 
    Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. 
    Thank you!  
    If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Connected Couple Program or engaging in relationship coaching work with me. 

    • 47 min
    How To Break Out Of Sexual Routines And Ignite More Pleasure - An Interview With Sarrah Rose

    How To Break Out Of Sexual Routines And Ignite More Pleasure - An Interview With Sarrah Rose

    Bio: 
    Sarrah Rose is the founder of the tantric sex coaching platform Tantric Activation. She developed her coaching techniques by studying tantra, mixing in evolutionary biology, and adapting the method for practical use in the modern world.
    Sarrah was trained in the tantra method in India. She then earned her certification as a Sex, Love and Relationship Coach from the Tantra Institute of Integrated Sexuality.
    (Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)
    In this episode, Sarrah Rose and Dr. Jessica Higgins discuss: 
    How to use your sexual energy in a conscious way rather than being controlled by it.  Becoming more aware of your patterns, shadow work, so that you can be more aligned in your mind, heart and sexuality. How your breath, sound, movement and focus helps you integrate the flow of energy throughout your body.  How to deal with challenges, like performance anxiety, fear of rejection, and being shutdown or closed off to sex.   How we train our body away from human physical touch when we use vibrators and porn.  Why couples stop having sex and what is critical to know about the 3 stages of love.  “For thousands of years, women have had to choose whether they were going to be accepted by society or express their sexuality.” by Sarrah Rose
    Mentioned: 
    Tantric Activation Sarrah Rose (website) Helen Fisher (website) Allison Armstrong (website) Relationship Map to Happy Lasting Love Free Guide  
    Connect with Sarrah Rose
    Website: Tantric Activation
    Facebook: facebook.com/TantricActivation/
    Instagram: instagram.com/tantricactivation/ 
    Twitter: @IAmSarrahRose 
     
    Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  
    Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 
    Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 
    Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts 
    Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 
    LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 
    Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 
    Website: drjessicahiggins.com  
    Email: jessica@drjessicahiggins.com
     
     
    If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. 
    Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. 
    Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. 
    Thank you!  
    If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Connected Couple Program or engaging in relationship coaching work with me. 

    • 41 min
    How To Find Your Emotional Balance

    How To Find Your Emotional Balance

    One of the most difficult tasks in relationships is to maintain our sense of self...to not loose our self in relationship. This can be even more challenging during times of conflict, stress and uncertainty. And especially true when our partner is pressuring us to be something different or when we fear their reaction and ultimately a loss of approval and love. 
    (Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)
     
    In this episode, Dr. Jessica Higgins discusses: 
    How important it is to work on becoming differentiated in relationship. The fallout of not maintaining a solid sense of self.  What it looks like when couples get stuck in emotional fusion and gridlock.  Dr. David Schnarch's Four Points Of Balance: Solid Flexible Self, Quiet Mind - Calm Heart, Grounded Responding, and Meaningful Endurance.  How differentiation relates to our passion, sexual desire and sexual intimacy.    "A solid sense of self develops from confronting yourself, challenging yourself to do what's right, and earning your own self-respect. It develops from inside you rather than from internalizing what's around you." by Dr. David Schnarch
     
    Mentioned: 
    Shifting Criticism into Connected Communication – Free Guide Crucible Institute Dr. David Schnarch (website) Intimacy & Desire, by Dr. David Schnarch (book) Resurrecting Sex, by Dr. David Schnarch (book) Passionate Marriage, by Dr. David Schnarch (book) ERP 110: HOW TO MANAGE TWO MAJORLY CONFLICTING NEEDS IN RELATIONSHIP (podcast) ERP 234: How To Deal With Fears Of Intimacy – Part two (podcast) ERP 233: How To Deal With Fears Of Intimacy – Part One (podcast) ERP 223: How To Deal With Difficult Emotions – Part One (podcast) ERP 224: How To Deal With Difficult Emotions – Part Two (podcast) Dr. Susan Johnson's website Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  
    Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 
    Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 
    Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts 
    Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 
    LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 
    Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 
    Website: drjessicahiggins.com  
    Email: jessica@drjessicahiggins.com
     
     
    If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. 
    Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. 
    Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. 
    Thank you!  
    If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Connected Couple Program or engaging in relationship coaching work with me. 

    • 38 min

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