162 episodes

The non-diet, intuitive eating podcast to help you stop dieting and find wellness without the obsession.

How to Love Your Body The Body Love Society

    • Health & Fitness
    • 3.8 • 4 Ratings

The non-diet, intuitive eating podcast to help you stop dieting and find wellness without the obsession.

    Ep 163 - Is Reverse Dieting a Good Dieting Alternative?

    Ep 163 - Is Reverse Dieting a Good Dieting Alternative?

    Welcome to How to Love Your Body - this week’s podcast episode is a review of Reverse Dieting. One of our community members sent us a post confused about whether it was a good non diet option so we wanted to review it to let you know what we think.

    Disclaimer: This episode will discuss dieting behaviors, some calorie numbers and for the love of god, do not google reverse dieting if you are trying to avoid diet culture and before and afters.

    The reason we are explaining it here is because it is one of those diets that don’t look like diets, it’s something that people trying to UnDiet may look at and be convinced that it’s a safe diet alternative… Here's what we found.

    Let’s start by explaining what reserve dieting is:

    Reverse dieting is often described as the diet after the diet, it is slowly increasing calories after a period of restriction.

    Here’s where the first diet culture red flags come in - the intention of this is often weight loss or prevention of weight gain.

    And honestly when we were first sent this I had a twinge of, oh this doesn’t look too bad, maybe that could work for some people, encouraging people to eat enough is never a bad thing...

    Here are 3 red flags of reverse dieting:

    You still have to count calories for the rest of your life. It is assumed that each day your body needs to same amount of fuel. It treats your body like a machine, and we are not machines.

    It has the same freedom language as macro counting (and the dreaded Noom) - eat whatever you want, there are no good or bad foods! AND you can only eat x calories a day. Well that is not freedom, that cannot be intuitive, it’s still a calculation where, yes you can eat a burger and fries but then you can’t eat much else for the rest of the day… 

    The intention is weight loss, there is a weight loss focus, no one reverse diets and accepts that maybe they were repressing their weight too much and their body WANTS to be at a different size. There is no body acceptance built into this work. 

    It comes across that the only issue with dieting is if you’re eating way too few calories and so if you increase your calories by a small amount, you will then solve all the problems that dieting causes.

    But we know that undereating isn’t the only thing that triggers binge eating, food obsession, weight preoccupation … mental restriction, the diet mentality, focusing on weight - all these things cause negative side effects, so adding some calories in isn’t a cure all. 

    The biggest selling point of reverse dieting is around metabolism, eating in this way controls your metabolism.

    The entire appeal of reverse dieting is the idea that we can control our metabolisms by manipulating the way we eat in a certain way: if you eat in this way you can override your metabolism and have all the benefits of weight loss while eating more, who doesn’t want that in the fatphobic world we live in!?

    These are the factors that effect metabolism:





    Body fat percentage


    Body Temperature

    Racial variation


    Being active (ex: pro athletes and manual laborers have a slightly higher BMR)

    Diet - yes prolonged under nutrition lowers the metabolic rate but not by a profound amount (this is a part of it but only one element of many and most of them we have no control over)

    Some simple googling online shows that metabolism is not something that we can change in any profound way:

    While total metabolism can change at the drop of a hat (when you exercise your metabolism is higher at that moment than if you sit down), your BMR is like a glacier, moving and changing ever so slowly. Plus it’s important to note that most of the factors that determine your BMR are not something you can intentionally change or control. Your age, gender, height, somatotype, and even genetics all acc

    • 36 min
    Ep 162 - Body Image & Relationships with Mary Jelkovsky

    Ep 162 - Body Image & Relationships with Mary Jelkovsky

    Today on How to Love Your Body we are talking to Mary Jelkovsky from Mary's Cup of Tea.

    She is the author of the book The Gift of Self Love and in this episode we dive into all things body image and romantic relationships.

    Whether you're single or in a relationship, doing UnDiet work can affect how we seek out or how we interact with a romantic partner.

    Tune into this episode to get tips and insights into how to set boundaries with your partner and be able to UnDiet without being limited by your romantic relationships.

    Mary is our guest expert in the Collective on June 30th!

    To access her Self Love Workshop be sure to join the waitlist for the Collective reopening in July!

    • 38 min
    Ep 161 - 4 Ways to an UnDieter's "Summer Body"

    Ep 161 - 4 Ways to an UnDieter's "Summer Body"

    Welcome to How to Love Your Body. On today’s episode we are talking about the infamous “summer body.” Now that summer is almost here you may be seeing a lot of “summer body” promotion - the typical meaning of this comes from diet culture which basically says that the body you have right now is not okay to go into summer because it needs to be thinner in order to wear a bathing suit and summer clothes. We’d like to call BS on that which is why we want to address 4 ways to an UnDieter’s “Summer Body.” 

    1. Get a new bathing suit for summer that fits the body you have today. Not only something that fits and feels comfortable but something you feel good in! All bodies have the ability to feel confident in a bathing suit - we must release the idea that bodies can only look good in bathing suits if they are a certain size. We know that maybe buying and trying on a bathing suit is not the funnest thing to do but you absolutely deserve to feel good. No more sitting on the sidelines and skipping beach trips/ pool days/ family fun on a vacation that involves a bathing suit etc… No more hiding behind cover ups. You have a “summer body” right now just by waking up in the body you have today and the season of summer rolling around. There are NO prerequisites to a summer body. So go get the bathing suit - if it’s bringing a bestie to help you go try them on with you or ordering them online and sending back the ones you don't want and keeping the one/s you do. However it works best for you, make sure you have a bathing suit that you like, feel good in, and feels comfortable! 

    2. Wear clothes that suit summer - yes, there is hype about bathing suits but it’s also important to wear clothes that are suitable for summer. No need to wear sweaters and pants when really a tank/ t-shirt and some shorts are really what would feel most comfortable in warmer weather. Do you have summer clothes that you feel good and proper for the weather? Temperature is one way to choose what kind of clothes to wear - when you are hot and the sun is shining - a lot of clothing may not be something that will give your body comfort. Your body will know according to the way it feels if you are honoring it. If it’s overly sweating because it’s being covered up when it’s hot outside there will be an unconscious sense of “I can’t allow my body to feel comfortable because of my size.” This message is deeply rooted from diet culture and not the truth! Your body gets to wear tank tops/ crop tops/ shorts/ and all the things that suit summer! 


    3. Upping your Self - Care as a priority - You may be feeling the pressure or anxieties that come along with summer approaching. Instead of forcing yourself onto a diet that doesn’t work - you can up your self-care. How to be on your way to an UnDieters Summer Body? Treat it with care - what is something you can do for your body that feels self-serving? Does your body need more rest? Does it need a massage? Does it need a lovely bath with your favorite bath salts/ candles/ followed up with a calming lotion? Do you enjoy manicuring it? Or do you need to allow yourself to not upkeep with the manicuring so rigidly? Ask yourself - “what does my body need?” And do that! 


    4. Wellness without the Obsession - We are going to keep this one super broad because we want to give the message that you do not have to ever, ever, ever try and change your body for the sake of getting a “summer body.” You are perfect as is in the body you are in today. But we did want to lightly bring up WWTO because there is nothing wrong with moving your body in ways that feel good, that don’t feel forced. It’s also great to eat in ways that feel good. You can drink a green smoothie because it feels good and still absolutely allow the cookies and pizza too. WWTO is something that isn’t “picked

    • 31 min
    Ep 160 - Making Intuitive Eating into a Step by Step Process

    Ep 160 - Making Intuitive Eating into a Step by Step Process

    Hello! Welcome to How to Love Your Body, today on the podcast we are talking about how to take the big, overwhelming, vague intangible work of intuitive eating and make it more tangible, action based and DOABLE!


    A major barrier for most people in UnDieting is that it’s a philosophy or idea that people can generally understand and get behind, they may even want to live that way… but what do I actually DO???


    Since they aren’t sure what to do they get stuck in learning, learning and learning more.

    Soon enough they’ve subscribed to every podcast, they’ve read every book on the topic and they follow every IE counsellor on Instagram, but not much has actually changed in the way they eat, think about food, move their bodies or think about their bodies.


    Of course some times will have big aha moments just from listening to this philosophy, and that is amazing!


    However, if that isn’t you, and you’re feeling stuck we have a lot of great insights to share with you, because this work CAN be more tangible, there really are steps to take to work towards things like ending binge eating, stopping mental and physical restriction, even body image work and pursuing wellness without the obsession.


    I believe that a lot of these step by step instructions aren’t talked about very much because the people who already live it and teach it just DO these things, they don’t even consciously realize it.


    What we have done over the last 6 or 7 years while we have been UnDieters and Intuitive Eaters is observe ourselves, how did we stop restricting? How did binge eating end? What if someone wanted to do this too? What would we say to do each step of the way?

    Here is an example:


    Ending binge eating:

    The advice that is often given is allow all foods and stop restricting:

    Okay well how do I DO that??


    It sounds easy, it sounds logical and straightforward. EAT! But as ex dieters we know it’s not that simple, if it were we wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place, so we want to help you break it down.


    Here are a few of the steps we recommend you take on your way to ending binge eating:


    The first is a mindset shift - it must be understood that eating the food regularly is what ends this cycle, so if you feel worried about eating chips for example, not eating them now leads to:


    Eating much more later/ binge eating (not that the goal is to eat less but if we push eating the food until we can’t resist anymore we will just eat it when our defenses are down which turns into a binge. This is like suppressing anger until you burst! Expressing emotions more regularly and more gently feels much better and is much healthier, it’s the same with food!) 

    Being preoccupied with the food, that feeling of not being able to focus because you know there’s ice cream in the freezer. This is caused by not eating the food regularly. 


    You may be fearful of eating the food but eating it regularly is how we move away from the diet/ binge cycle and into UnDieting.


    Okay so how do I do this in steps??


    Now that you’re coming from a place of understanding that eating all foods regularly is the key to a healthy relationship with food (remember, think of it as suppressing emotions - that never ends well!) it’s time to begin eating the dang food.


    Step 1: Identify your binge foods. 

    Write a list, what are the foods that you binge on?


    Step 2: Identify binge times. Is it at night after the kids have gone to bed? Alone on the weekends?


    Step 3: Get these foods into the house (We know this is scary!) It is best to do this on a normal grocery run, not a special trip. We want to normalize these foods so purchasing the potato chips along with the broccoli and yogurt is a good first step!


    Step 4: Store these “special” foods where yo

    • 40 min
    Ep 159 - The 3 Keys of A Healthy Relationship with Exercise

    Ep 159 - The 3 Keys of A Healthy Relationship with Exercise

    Since this is the final day to join our 21 Day Relationship with Movement Intensive we wanted to address the 3 key areas of a healthy relationship with exercise.

    1. Untying exercise and weight loss

    This is where dieters have a real problem - using exercise as a weight loss tool. When we were dieters we exercised to burn calories, make up for what we saw as "extra food" or even as a way to justify eating at all in many instances.

    Why is this a problem other than the obvious?

    For someone who is trying to get out of the diet mentality this leads to either continuing to exercise and really limiting their ability to be intuitive or grow these new skills and new way of thinking


    The person stops exercising at all because they don't want to be focusing on weight loss.

    These options provide no nuance or balance and that's what we love in this work - having it all!

    This obstacle is addressed in the Movement Intensive​

    2. Getting out of all or nothing thinking and learning to be flexible with your schedule

    All or nothing thinking with movement leads to a lot of "why bother" moments.

    I only have 15 minutes - why bother.

    I feel tired and can't do a big, sweaty workout - why bother.

    I can't go to the gym (due to pandemic or any other reason) - why bother.

    When you pursue a healthy relationship with movement you have thoughts like this instead:

    I have 15 mins, I'm going to get out for a walk with my favorite podcast.

    I'm tired but it would feel good to move, I'm going to do this stretching video.

    I can't go to the gym, I'm going to do this dance video.

    When you get out of all or nothing thinking you get to just do what works for you and that generally leads to an overall balanced life of movement, rest and just living life!

    ​This is a major focus of The Movement Intensive!​

    3. Removing judgement around type, length or intensity of workouts - there's a place for all of it!

    If you see 15 mins of exercise as useless or not "good enough" you won't bother when that's all the time you have but you're human, there will be many times when you don't have time and just brushing those moments off leaves you with a contentious relationship with exercise.

    This leads to those battles of feeling bad for not exercising and then not working out because you feel bad! It's a vicious cycle.

    It's similar as what you are likely working on with food - the apple isn't better than the apple pie, they're just different and both have a place. Exercise is the same, there's room for it all and it's important to get rid of judgement.

    ​This is another element we work through in The Movement Intensive.​

    Looking forward to finding a healthy relationship with exercise together!

    Love, Lauren & Jenna

    PS - Doors close tonight at 7 pm pacific, 8 pm mountain, 9 pm central, 10 pm eastern.

    • 21 min
    Ep 158 - I can't keep food in the house without binge eating (or obsessing over it)

    Ep 158 - I can't keep food in the house without binge eating (or obsessing over it)

    This week we are diving into a post we shared on the value of keeping food IN your house.

    This is something that worries a lot of people and when we posted this we received a lot of great responses:


    People who agree and have experienced the magic of being able to have food in the house and not worrying about it (particularly the desserts and snacks they used to binge on)


    Those who disagree and state that they just cannot keep food in the house without obsessing over it or bingeing on it.


    We address both sides of this experience and give you insights into why ANYONE can get to a place of having food freedom and having whatever foods they love in the house and even forgetting the food is there at all!


    • 22 min

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