31 episodes

In this podiobook: Part film noir detective story, part fantasy adventure, part East End gangster tale, How to Disappear Completely concerns Theo Braithwaite, a failed actress and worse waitress, becoming involved in an unseen world populated by history's rejects and runaways from a secret society known as The Footmen. A stranger to London, waiting for life to come and find her, she is instead found by a part-time thief called Kilbey Salmon who, along with his rockabilly-obsessed partner, is attempting to eke out a living stealing things that have already been stolen and finding people who don't want to be found.An episodic narrative, Kilbey and Nero's capers will drag Theo through the forgotten parts and people of London, hunted by ancient sects, carnivorous shadows, cannibalistic butchers and off-duty policemen. Along the way she'll meet the Eternal Footmen, blow up Hammersmith Bridge, reach the end of history and quite possibly disappear completely.If Theo is to survive, she'll need to get her life sorted before all of our futures catch up with her.

The Terrible Business of Salmon & Dusk Myke Bartlett

    • Arts
    • 5.0 • 1 Rating

In this podiobook: Part film noir detective story, part fantasy adventure, part East End gangster tale, How to Disappear Completely concerns Theo Braithwaite, a failed actress and worse waitress, becoming involved in an unseen world populated by history's rejects and runaways from a secret society known as The Footmen. A stranger to London, waiting for life to come and find her, she is instead found by a part-time thief called Kilbey Salmon who, along with his rockabilly-obsessed partner, is attempting to eke out a living stealing things that have already been stolen and finding people who don't want to be found.An episodic narrative, Kilbey and Nero's capers will drag Theo through the forgotten parts and people of London, hunted by ancient sects, carnivorous shadows, cannibalistic butchers and off-duty policemen. Along the way she'll meet the Eternal Footmen, blow up Hammersmith Bridge, reach the end of history and quite possibly disappear completely.If Theo is to survive, she'll need to get her life sorted before all of our futures catch up with her.

    1. 1. The Grey Men - How to Disappear Completely

    1. 1. The Grey Men - How to Disappear Completely

    -In this episode: In which Theo arrives late to her last morning of employment at the Camden Cafe, with little idea that life is about to take a sharp detour. London is about to surprise her - at last! - just not in the way she'd been expecting. For a start there are

    • 18 min
    2. 2. Pale Ghosts - How to Disappear Completely

    2. 2. Pale Ghosts - How to Disappear Completely

    -In this episode: In which Theo makes a friend, an enemy and an ex-boyfriend. Over several glasses of wine, secrets are revealed. 'There are ghosts here, y'know? In the brickwork, down the drain. But they're shy, right? They don't come out for just anyone. They know b

    • 33 min
    3. 3. The Last Train - How to Disappear Completely

    3. 3. The Last Train - How to Disappear Completely

    -In this episode: In which taking the last train home leads Theo into a darker world than even that she knew to exist underground. With phantoms crawling from the walls, help arrives in the form of a drunken stranger - Kilbey Salmon: tall, dark and utterly improbable.

    • 33 min
    4. 4. The Grieving Girlfriend - How to Disappear Completely

    4. 4. The Grieving Girlfriend - How to Disappear Completely

    -In this episode: In which we uncover the terrible business of Salmon and Dusk. A beautiful woman makes Kilbey an offer he politely declines, but he takes on her case regardless. While Nero fumes about the car's lack of central heating, Kilbey plans to track down a lo

    • 12 min
    5. 5. The Albion - How to Disappear Completely

    5. 5. The Albion - How to Disappear Completely

    -In this episode: In which Theo is taken to a underground bar in a Camden toilet and Kilbey meets a punter. Nero talks about time travel and cab routes, while the barman puts the decline of the nation down to the rise of the theme pub. By the way, just who are The Ete

    • 29 min
    6. 6. Nation of Shopkeepers - How to Disappear Completely

    6. 6. Nation of Shopkeepers - How to Disappear Completely

    -In this episode: In which Theo sinks further into Albion while Kilbey and Nero do a spot of shopping. Encountering the unsavoury gaze of the Meatmarketers and a Shopkeeper who would prefer they took their business elsewhere, the three begin their hunt for a stolen bo

    • 24 min

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5
1 Rating

1 Rating

Inkolater ,

Mesmerising!

In a rich and often beautiful prose style, Australian author Myke Bartlett writes about London as if it were a living thing. There is a sense of dread and menace almost from the get-go; a thoroughly enjoyable creepiness that really sets the spine to tingling. Bartlett is also a great reader, and his judicious use of music hightens the tension and eerieness in all the right places. A great podcast novel.

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