Dateology Coach Podcast Dateology Coach Podcast

Could you date someone who cheated on a previous partner? (01:42)

We revisit an exchange between Carrie and Big about his admission of infidelity in his first marriage. The scene spawned a conversation about whether we'd ask a new mate if they'd been unfaithful and how we'd handle it if they said yes.
Could you date a cheater? Vote in our poll!



How do you stop romanticising a failed relationship? (14:49)

A woman is having second thoughts after breaking up with her long-distance partner



How does she go about dating women after years of dating men? (23:57)

A listener seeks advice about navigating the dating scene as a woman looking to date women.


Why do well-rounded women struggle to find a partner? (34:20)

Ugh. This tired conversation about men being turned off and intimidated by self-sufficient women.


Share your thoughts in the comments!



Submit Your Dating Questions—Questions are answered on free episodes. If your letter is used on a members-only post, you will be sent the answer to your letter via email.



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This episode would be perfect for #messytok. #dating #datingadvice #datinghumor



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Maybe Don't Try To Date When You're Married (03:42)

I posted the full letter here.  It's...a lot. Feel free to leave your thoughts.



Ask Dateology Coach - Green Card Marriage Confusion (12:29)



Predictors of Long-Term Singlehood (23:23)

An article in Psychology Today examines a study regarding long-term singlehood and which personality traits are most likely to contribute to this outcome.


Should She Dog Sit Her Ex's Dog While He Travels With His New Girlfriend? (41:25)

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Listener Letter - This Is What Decentering Men Looks Like (05:41)

So, I've been seeing this girl for 2 months. We're hitting it off really well. I'm 30+ and this is the first time in a long long time I think we could have a future together. The problem is I'm only seeing her like once every 3-4 weeks. We've seen each other 3 times by now and last time also had s*x. Everything is there, the connection, the intimacy, the attraction... I really like her. But she's currently in therapy and admits that maybe she shouldn't have started dating yet but wasn't expecting to find someone she'd bond with like me so quickly. Next to therapy (2 days a week) she still works (3 days a week), which I respect a lot. But in the weekends her (social) battery has run out and she's not able to see anyone. This will probably go on for more than a year and I don't know what to do... Also when it comes to emotions, I wear my heart on my sleeve (INFP) and she's the opposite (INTP). This causes some problems too sometimes but nothing big. Our communication is also very open and we can talk about everything. But sometimes she disconnects from the world for 2 days. I can understand but it makes me feel like I'm just a tool to use whenever she's up for it. Don't get me wrong, I want to support her in the process of therapy, I've been there myself. But sometimes it's hard. I want to settle and that's not going to happen for the coming year(s). One day I'm prepared to wait that long and the next day I'm not. It's weird to ask this to you, I have never done that before because I'm a very intuitive person. But what would you do?


Listener Letter - Instagram Dating Dillema (15:23)

Hello, I'm interested in your opinion. A week ago I unfollowed my ex from Instagram. I still have feelings for him, we ended up on good terms but he doesn't seem to be doing anything about reaching out to me. Actually he did reach out a few times in these few years, but nothing significant in my opinion. And so it ended that I unfollowed him and removed him from my followers. What do you think about my action? (and what he might be thinking) Basically, I really don't know how I feel about this, like it's him watching all my activities and stories all the time but never reached out in a serious way. So in closure, I thought okay...if you don't want anything serious why would I give you the pleasure of knowing what is going on in my life right now.




⁠He's Intimidated By Her Social Media Presence⁠ (25:33)⁠

On a second date, a man grills Tiktoker StaceyDee about her social media presence. We discuss ways to avoid these kinds of awkward conversations and how much information you should provide in the first few dates.



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Listener Question - Who Pays For The Uber? (01:36)

Am I the a*****e for thinking she was actually using this man for his money?

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMMvBSbRR/

Should a man give you a ride or pay for your Uber when you spent the night with him? Should he walk you home(if you live nearby) or walk you to your car/stop?


Bumble's Fumble (08:10)
If you're a dating app user and on any social media platform, you've probably heard about Bumble's disastrous re-branding campaign.   Women across the interwebs collectively pushed back on their anti-celibacy messaging. The groundswell of criticism was so overwhelming that Bumble issued an apology. Well, an "apology." This Bumble Fumble shined a light on just how done women are with the apps and dating as a whole.



Listener Question - Should She Meet Up With Her Ex? (28:37)

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Genuine Response or Polite Blow-Off? - Listener Submitted Letter (06:55)
I asked a woman out the other day and asked if maybe she wanted to go to dinner. She texted me back the following day and said she had dental surgery this week and she may not be able to eat. We can touch base next week. What does this mean?



His Fiance Wants His Ex To Change Her Last Name (09:19)

"My ex-husband is insisting I change my last name back to my name before marriage because his new fiancé, a 24-year-old woman, feels it will be awkward for her and me to have the same last name. Am I the a*****e for refusing to change it?" Uh, NO.



Troll Twist on Dating Apps - Listener Submitted Letter (19:01)

I’ve noticed an uptick in men accusing women on dating apps that they believe the women’s pictures are AI. What do you think? Is this another example of a way to attack women?


How Late Is Too Late To Show Up For A First Date?⁠ (24:08)

Her date was ten minutes late. She left. Did she overreact? This is why you should never go on a date with someone you're lukewarm about.














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She Was Ready (00:22)

If you follow me on social media, you probably know that our third Golden Girl, Luca, crossed the Rainbow Bridge on Monday. We talked about how going through this with Luca helped me confront my avoidant nature and fear of anticipatory grief.


Are More Men Going To Therapy? (12:21)

Emily McCombs, a former xoJane columnist, recently shared her thoughts on the resurgence of dating apps. In her article, she side-eyes the increasing number of men embracing therapy, a trend that I find both fascinating and encouraging.


Would You Date Someone That Worked In A Pizza Parlor? (28:16)

Influencer Hope xxx was roasted this week for remarks about not wanting to date someone who worked in a pizza parlor. We talk about whether or not this preference is classist and how men are never raked over the coals for their superficial preferences.



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