Healthy relationships do not start from a standpoint of “scarcity,” “shortage,” or “something missing.” Contrary to popular cliches, they are not about finding our “other half,” or someone to “complete” us. Healthy relationships are built only with people who are already complete going in.
People want their romantic relationships to be stable; they want their profound love to remain constant at its initial profound level. However, people would also like their romantic love to be wild and unstable in the sense of unpredictable. They do not want to take each other for granted, like something inanimate that remains the same all the time; they want love to be wild and exciting. This may be termed "The paradox of stability." So do we want romantic stability or not?