The Diary of a Single Catholic Writer Jocelyn Soriano

Wherever you may be right now, I pray that you find your hope in God.

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Sometimes I wonder if the world still knows what kindness means.
Can we still be kind? Can we still see each person in the same way that God sees each one of us?
One of the most popular Bible verses define love, and these are the very first words: “Love is patient and is kind.” (1 Corinthians 13:4, WEBBE)
It must follow therefore that in order to love, we must also learn how to be kind.
I think many people would agree. And many proclaim how badly this world needs kindness. But I guess the important question here is, “Do we even know what it means to be kind?”
Because we may not agree anymore about kindness when we start to differ in our opinion about what it means.
Is kindness mere tolerance?
Is kindness a way of being polite? Is kindness keeping your silence in order not to offend another?
C.S. Lewis had this very interesting quote:
“The real trouble is that 'kindness' is a quality fatally easy to attribute to ourselves on quite inadequate grounds. Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment. Thus a man easily comes to console himself for all his other vices by a conviction that 'his heart's in the right place' and 'he wouldn't hurt a fly,' though in fact he has never made the slightest sacrifice for a fellow creature. We think we are kind when we are only happy: it is not so easy, on the same grounds, to imagine oneself temperate, chaste, or humble.”
Lewis described how some of us may view kindness. For some of us, we can be kind as long as we are not being bothered. We can be kind as long as we don’t need to inconvenience ourselves or sacrifice something for the other person.
I guess that would not be a good definition of kindness. If love is kind and kindness is a part of love, then we must be willing to love and to be kind even when we need to sacrifice something for the people that we love.
Still, we need to further clarify something. Because even if we can make sacrifices and consider being kind to others, we may not do it the right way.
What about in those situations when we want so much to be kind and not to offend anyone that we start to merely give in every time even when we are no longer doing what is best for the other person?
Is kindness simply providing what the other person wants?
Is kindness merely being concerned about immediately taking away the other person’s suffering?
Again, C.S. Lewis had another interesting quote:
“Kindness consents very readily to the removal of its object – we have all met people whose kindness to animals is constantly leading them to kill animals lest they should suffer. Kindness, merely as such, cares not whether its object becomes good or bad, provided only that it escapes suffering.”
As we can see, kindness involves taking into consideration the good of the other person. True kindness is helping our loved ones live a good life and become the best version of themselves, even if it means they must suffer for a while.
Pleasing people is not the same as loving people.
In some cases, we may simply be allowing some inner selfishness to creep in. In a way, we don’t want to disappoint people. We want their admiration and we fear their rejection.
It is not that we must justify being harsh. Some people may just as easily use this excuse to justify their unkindness in the name of being right.
No, we also must avoid doing that. For how could even do what’s best for our loved ones if they fail to see kindness in our eyes and kindness in the words we speak.
We can be firm and kind at the same time.
It is not easy. But we must ask God to help us.
In the worst of situations, let us remember that we can still be human, we can still look at other people with a merciful heart.
“Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.” – Mother Teresa
“Do your little bit of good

Sometimes I wonder why people don't want to believe in God.
I'm not referring to those who can't believe at the moment or to those who find it hard to believe because of some difficult situations they've been through.
What I'm referring to is the refusal to believe, and that utter hate for the mere thought of God.
Why the hatred? Why such a strong desire that there were no God?
Is it such a bad idea to hope in God?
Perhaps there is a reason only such people know. And who knows? Someday, saints may even come from those who do not believe now.
As for me, I would like to believe that there is a God. And here are some of the reasons why:
1. God is the final arbiter of Justice
When we talk about reality, we have to admit that justice is not always served in this life. Many things are unfair. Innocent people are punished, while the guilty are set free.
We need a final Judge who will judge without prejudice or any selfish agenda. A Judge who knows everything, who will reveal the truth for all the world to see. A Judge who will render what is due to each one, who will not turn a deaf ear nor be swayed to the left or to the right from implementing what is fair.
2. Only God's Mercy can comfort the sick, the poor and the most vulnerable.
Life is full of suffering. No person is spared from weakness or pain.
We need a God who can comfort our deepest sorrows and heal our most painful wounds.
Who can feed each hungry person? Who can listen to every broken heart?
No matter how good our intentions may be, we can't reach everyone in need. We need a God who will bring Mercy and Compassion to all who hurt and mourn. We need a God who can save us from death and give us eternal life.
3. God is our constant companion
No matter how many people we know, there will always be a part in us that will long for that One companion who will never leave us and who will understand the deepest desires of our hearts.
"He cares for you.He watches your every move. There's no one that loves youcan do that." - Mother Angelica

4. God is infinite beauty
Everything on earth that delights us must come to an end. Sooner or later, the source of our pleasures would expire and fade away. Even the beauty of nature has its limits.
Who else can be our infinite delight but God who is infinite beauty Himself?
What good is eternity unless we gaze upon that beauty that transcends all understanding? Beauty that satisfies and heals the soul?
5. Only God's Love will never fail
Source of all goodness. The only One who cannot fail. Light that overcomes all darkness. Joy that never ends.
Only God will never fail us. Only His Love can give us true and lasting happiness.
“O Love, that wilt not let me go,I rest my weary soul in Thee;I give Thee back the life I owe,That in Thine ocean depths its flowMay richer, fuller be.O Light, that followest all my way,I yield my flickering torch to Thee;My heart restores its borrowed ray,That in Thy sunshine's blaze its dayMay brighter, fairer be.” - George Matheson
Final words
I cannot claim that my faith never falters. I cannot claim that I never had my doubts.
But our doubts need not lead to our despair. Our doubts need not lead towards our hatred of God.
Despite all our misgivings, our complaints and our many questions, isn’t it still a comfort to hope that there is a God who is good, a God who loves us and desires the best for us?
Why not believe in God?
Why not desire to find the Source of all that’s good and true and wonderful? Why ignore your thirst for beauty without comparison, and happiness without end?
I pray that I may continue to believe through it all. I pray that we may continue to believe through it all. May God help you and I and may He give us the grace to always hope and trust in Him.
If you want to read more about believing in a God you cannot see, you may want to take a look at my book: To Love an Invisible God
Buy today on Amazon
Is it really possible to love a God we cannot even see

There was a time someone asked me what kind of relationship I wanted to have.
Is it the kind where I’m the one who is loved more? Or is it where I love the other person more?
During that time, I thought that a relationship where I’m loved more is better. Isn’t it good to be showered with affection? Isn’t it good to be the one thought and cared about?
Later, however, I had this realization. If asked again, I’d say that it is better to be the one who truly loves.
Why?
Because when you are loved, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you are happy, and it doesn’t necessarily mean that your life becomes meaningful.
How many people who are loved are still miserable? How many people who are loved fail to value the love being given to them?
When you are loved, you can reject the love being given to you. You can remain alone and sad, never allowing love to warm your heart.
Aren’t we all loved by God? Then why aren’t we always satisfied?
It’s not that the love of God is insufficient. It’s because being loved is not enough. If being loved were enough, God wouldn’t have had to command us these two things: to love God above all, and to love our neighbor as we love ourselves.
We need to love. It’s the only way that we can be whole and happy. It’s what could give meaning and purpose to our lives.
It is true that God loved us first, but we have to allow that love to enter our being, to change us and empower us so that we could love in return.
Only by loving can we be fully human. Only by loving could we ever be like God.
St. Francis of Assisi once prayed:
O Master, let me not seek as much to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love, for it is in giving that one receives, it is in self-forgetting that one finds, it is in pardoning that one is pardoned, it is in dying that one is raised to eternal life.
Following is a poem I have recently composed about loving and being loved:
Is It Better To Love Or To Be Loved?
It's not the one who is loved Who's got everything, It's not the one who is Showered with gifts, The one thought about, The one whose life Is cared for And saved.
But the one who is happy Is the one who cares, The one who gives The one who knows What it means To go out of oneself And live In the heart of another.
It is the lover who sees, And the lover who feels, It is the lover who discovers That save for love There is no life And save for love There is no meaning To everything else.
We are most happy When we love, We are most ourselves When we think about another.
And though at times Love may hurt And love may not Be returned, It is better still To love Than not to love.
Those who are loved May not want it, May not feel it, May not allow it To enter their very being To be changed.
But those who love, Those who truly love Have already been changed, Have already seen Beauty, Eternity, And goodness That never fades.




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Hi, how are you doing these days?
I hope that whatever you’re going through, you find some time to talk to the One who loves you.
I know I’m often guilty of neglecting to spend some quiet time with Jesus. Not that I don’t want to. I usually have this sort of intention that I’d do it, that I’d spend time with Him. But as the demands of the day increase, I find less and less time to talk to Him.
Sometimes I’m able to listen to a good song and somehow, I get in touch with His consoling presence again. My soul is lifted up and I’m reminded that there is another kind of life I should look forward to.
The same effect comes to me whenever I read a good book. One example is The Lord of the Rings. I find it particularly moving whenever I read about the elves. To me, they’re as close as I could get to imagining how angels must be like. (Though I know that’s still a far comparison.)
But whenever I read about the elves, I’m able to visualize how we could be in heaven. In heaven, we’d be more beautiful than we now are. In heaven, we won’t get sick, and we would no longer die. Aren’t the elves like that?
Perhaps God uses every tool possible to catch my attention, to remind me that I shouldn’t just look at this life, especially when I’m starting to lose hope.
There is another life, there is a heaven where we can finally be with the One who loves us most. I hope we can spend time today letting this thought sink in and encourage us wherever we may be in life. God bless you!
"The others cast themselves down upon the fragrant grass, but Frodo stood awhile still lost in wonder. It seemed to him that he had stepped through a high window that looked on a vanished world. A light was upon it for which his language had no name. All that he saw was shapely, but the shapes seemed at once clear cut, as if they had been first conceived and drawn at the uncovering of his eyes, and ancient as if they had endured for ever. He saw no colour but those he knew, gold and white and blue and green, but they were fresh and poignant, as if he had at that moment first perceived them and made for them names new and wonderful. In winter here no heart could mourn for summer or for spring. No blemish or sickness or deformity could be seen in anything that grew upon the earth. On the land of Lórien there was no stain." - The Lord of the Rings
Have you listened to this issue’s podcast?
I hope you were able to click the “play” button above. This is the very first public podcast for Catholic Diary. (The previous one titled “Did I Have an Encounter with an Angel?” was a private podcast for paid subscribers. ) The recording is very raw, I’ve done the audio at my room and you may even hear background sounds every now and then. I chose not to edit them so you could imagine more that we’re just in the same room and I’m talking to you as a friend would. Until the next Newsletter and podcast, do take care. God bless you!
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Have you ever wondered whether the person you’ve met was actually an angel in disguise? While there are people whose kindness reminds us of angelic qualities, there are instances when we couldn’t help but wonder if we have met an angel in real life.
I have had such an experience some years ago while I was going home very late from work. There were days when I went home without any fear, but during that time, I felt like praying for help and protection.
From what I could remember, I prayed that an angel be sent to protect me. It was as simple as that. After praying, I even sort of forgot all about it as I busied myself going home.
I had no car and the public transportation I had to use in the Philippines then was the jeepney. It was smaller than a bus and commuters sat next to each other on two opposite sides of the vehicle. If there was anyone who wanted to do something bad, it would be very easy. (I once experienced someone pointing something sharp toward me just to steal my mobile phone. I have written the related story in another piece.)
Going back to that night, I noticed a guy sitting right next to me who never moved even when other people already got off the vehicle. At one point, he even talked to me saying something like I had to be very careful because there are a lot of bad guys in the area.
No, he wasn’t a robber. He didn’t do anything bad. And I had no sort of bad feeling about him. I felt comfortable and protected with his presence.
The man just sat like that until I had to get off the vehicle myself, and I was thankful for his presence. It was only after that experience that I’ve remembered the prayer I had before going home.
And I couldn’t help but wonder, “Was he an angel in disguise?”
“Our prayers are so dear to God, that he has appointed the angels to present them to him as soon as they come forth from our mouths. 'The angels,' says St. Hilary, 'preside over the prayers of the faithful, and offer them daily to God.' This is that smoke of the incense, which are the prayers of saints, which St. John saw ascending to God from the hands of the angels (Apoc. 8,3); and which he saw in another place represented by golden phials full of sweet odors, very acceptable to God.” - St. Alphonsus Maria de Liguori
Here’s a song I have composed about angels when I was in high school. You can also hear a little bit of my very rough recording of it in the audio file in this post.
WINGS IN MY LIFE
(Original song composition)
I.
I know that there are reasons for rainy days to comeI know that there are timeswhen my tears can't help but fall
But such times are not the timeswhen I should feel aloneSomebody's hand is on my shoulderSomebody's eyes are on my soul
CHORUS:
('Cause/And) There have been angels in my lifeThere have been wings that carried me to reach the skyTo dream my dreams and be the best I can beThere have been wings that carried me
There have been angels in my lifeSomebody stood by me when all the world was greyAnd now I only prayTo thank the Lord for giving you to me
II.
The road ahead is windingbut I know I'll make it throughCause there's no mountain that's too highwhen I know I climb with you
You help me know what I can doYou know what's deep insideThe stars can't help but smile and shine on meWhen I pass by through the night
(Repeat Chorus)
Refrain:
You helped me grow my own wingsand make them really strongAnd now I find the strength insideto fly so high
(Repeat Chorus)
Want to pray to angels? Here’s a free app that could help you.
Download Free App
I leave you with some quotes about angels as a reminder of their presence and importance in our lives:
"We should show our affection for the angels, for one day they will be our coheirs just as here below they are our guardians and trustees appointed and set over us by the Father."- St. Bernard of Clairvaux
"At the orders of the queen, the angels frequently assisted the apostles in their travels and tribulations ... The