Plumbing the Death Star Bad Brain Boys

Let it never be said that Plumbing the Death Star doesn’t have it’s fingers firmly on the pulse of pop culture. Over the weekend Joel Duscher watched the wonderful motion picture Bones from 2001 starring everyone's favourite-cum-actor Snoop Dogg and has the most obvious question on his lips to all that have seen that film: How Could You Stop Jimmy Bones? If you're one of the very few who haven't seen Bones (2001), or just want a simple refresher, have no fear as JD walks us all through the events of the star studded film! From being a humble man about town to controlling spirit realm, Plumbing the Death Star are here to figure out how one defeats a man who can become a dog, who can become a woman, who can summon maggots, who can control spirits, who can create beautiful blood art out of random passers by, who can take faces and uses his portal to hell to torture his victims. It's not a job for the feint of heart, but maybe Officer Respectable can crack this case!
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Can you believe it? There’s so many frikkin rats in this sweet little German town of Hamelin and there’s some fool dressed in pied that says he can get rid of them all with his silly little pipe and, get this, they’re gonna pay him a thousand German dollars and or francs! Well not on our watch! We’ll do it for the sweet reward of 50 Australian Dollars and the love of the game. Zammit finds out what rats hate and immediately thinks of spaghetti, JD thinks way too highly of structural engineering in the 15th century and Jackson forgets just how flammable a tiny town with thatched roofs is. So come with us to the town of Hamelin as we try and puzzle this one out and then deal with that sneaky mayor who won’t pay us a dime.
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Sure NASA had those big dollars to give Stanley Kubrick to fake the moon landing, but what if they instead has a crisp five dollar note to instead hire America’s favourite boys, us idiots? From confiscating TVs to filming at Bondi with Moon Babes to just straight up hijacking Sputnik footage and claiming it as our own! No stone is left unturned in finding the perfect solution to faking the moon landing. There are no nos on the path to greatness, only great ideas that may or may not start a nuclear winter. All we know is that we (and by we I mean the USA greatest nation of them all) need to beat those Ruskies in the space race by any means necessary or the American people will be so sad! The worst American is a sad American, so you better pray these boys can find an answer to this problem quick smart.
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In 1977 Marvel attempted to answer the important questions with their What If…? line of comics. They Failed. Now in the year of 2024 the Plumbing Boys have picked up the slack and dared to ask once again: What if?