Audrey's EASY ENGLISH Podcast Audrey

Episode 30  Desire for approval

Script:

Hello, everyone, how are you? This week, the topic is "desire for approval". Social media is becoming more and more popular these days, and we often hear the phrase "desire for approval." It means wanting others to recognize and praise us. For example, imagine you bake a cake and share pictures of it on social media, hoping to get comments and likes. When you see those comments, it makes you happy. It's the feeling of wanting everyone to acknowledge that you did something good. To acknowledge means to admit and accept.

Life used to be simpler before social media became so popular. We didn't feel the need to show pictures of ourselves or of our friends and family at a restaurant. The only time we would show pictures to others was probably when we went on trips.

But social media has changed everything. Nowadays, people, especially women, post pictures of their new clothes, shoes, and jewelry on their social media pages. They also post pictures of the food they eat at restaurants, sometimes even just a cup of coffee.   They post their selfies at the gym.  Why do they do that?

I think maybe they feel insecure. They need validation, which means they want other people to say that they are good or important. Social media gives them a
way to seek that validation from others. This desire for approval can stem from various factors. In today's digital age, social media has created a culture of comparison and competition. When we see others sharing their achievements and glamorous lifestyles, it can make us feel inadequate and fuel our own desire for validation. We may believe that receiving recognition from others will make us feel more valuable and worthy.

The number of likes, comments, and followers has become a measure of popularity and success. As a result, many individuals find themselves caught in a constant pursuit of more followers, striving to maintain an online presence that gather attention and praise.

However, it is essential to recognize the potential downsides of this reliance on external validation. The constant need for approval can lead to a distorted sense of self-worth, as our value becomes tied solely to the opinions of others. It can also create anxiety as we feel compelled to constantly seek validation in
every aspect of our lives.

It is crucial to shift our focus inward. Building self-confidence and embracing our unique qualities and accomplishments can help us break free from the cycle of seeking external validation. Our worth should not be determined solely by the opinions of others.

In conclusion, while the desire for approval is increasingly prevalent in the age of social media, it is important to understand its underlying causes
and impact on our well-being. By striving to develop a stronger sense of self-worth and reducing our dependence on external validation, we can find a
healthier balance in our online interactions and cultivate a more authentic sense of happiness in our lives.

 

Vocabulary

acknowledge - means to admit and accept

validation – the act of checking and proving accuracy

inadequate – lacking the quality

distorted - twisted

prevalent - widespread

Script:

Episode 29

This week I am going to teach you a few phrases on how to sound like a native speaker.  I will give you two examples for each phrase.

The first one is

"You don't say...".  It is an expression used to convey a sense of surprise or disbelief at something that has been said. It is often used sarcastically to suggest that the speaker already knew what was said.

Example 1:

Person A:
"Did you hear that it's going to rain tomorrow?"

Person B:
"You don't say. I guess I should pack an umbrella."

Example 2:

Person A:
"I just found out that the movie we want to see is sold out."

Person B:
"You don't say. Well, maybe we can catch a different movie instead."

Number 2

"Tell me about it".  It is an expression used to express agreement or empathy with someone who is describing a frustrating or difficult situation. It suggests that the speaker has been through a similar experience and understands how the other person feels.

Example 1:

Person A: "I've been waiting in line for two hours to buy tickets."

Person B:
"Tell me about it. I waited in line for three hours last week."

 Example 2:

Person A:
"I can't believe how hard it is to find a job right now."

Person B:
"Tell me about it. I've been applying to dozens of places and haven't heard back from anyone."

 Number 3

"I am losing it".  It is an expression used to describe someone who is becoming increasingly frustrated, overwhelmed, or stressed out. It suggests that the person is struggling to keep their emotions under control.

Example 1:

Person A:
"I have so much work to do and not enough time to do it."

Person B:
"I know, it's really stressful. You seem like you're losing it a little."

 Example 2:

Person A:
"I can't find my keys anywhere and I'm going to be late for my appointment."

Person B:
"Take a deep breath, you don't want to lose it over something small like this."

Number 4

"You tell me" – “You tell me" can be used to express agreement or emphasize that the speaker shares the same sentiment as the other person. It implies that the other person has made a valid point or observation, and the speaker is asking them to elaborate or offer their opinion.

Example 1:

Person A:  I heard the new restaurant downtown has amazing food.

Person B: You tell me!  I have been meaning to try it out but haven’t had the chance yet.

Example 2:

Person A: I think we should leave early to avoid the traffic.

Person B:
You tell me.  You know the roads around here better than I do.”

Number 5:

"Have a beef with someone" is an idiom used to describe a situation where someone has a strong disagreement or grievance with another person. It suggests that there is a conflict or tension between the two individuals.

Example 1:

Person A:
"Why are you avoiding Sarah?"

Person B:
"I have a beef with her. She said some things that really upset me."

 Example 2:

Person A: "Why did you quit your job at the restaurant?"

Person B: "I had a beef with the owner. He was always micromanaging me and I couldn't take it anymore."

 

Thank you for listening.

 

Script:



Episode 28: How to get unstuck and continue a conversation:



Hello, everyone. How are you? Last week I was not feeling well, and skipped an episode. Sorry about that.



This week, I want to talk about how to get unstuck and continue a conversation.



We have all been there. Sometimes, when somebody asks us a question, we need time to think of an answer, or we forget what we are trying to say. Sometimes, we simply don't know the answer.



What should we do when we are in these situations? It depends on the question that you are asked.



Scenario one. You need more time to get your thoughts together, so buy yourself time by saying something.



You can say,



a) "Great question, let me think about that for a moment."



b) "You know, I have never thought about that. Let me think about that."



c) "You know, I am not sure, let me think about that".





Scenario two: When somebody asks your opinion about something that you don't know, answer a question with a question.



You can say, "I am not sure, what about you?"



You often hear people say "what about you?" and "how about you?". These two phrases are often used to ask for the other person's opinion or response.



"What about you?" is more straightforward and direct. "How about you?" is less formal, more friendly and casual. It is often used as a follow-up question to a proposal and suggestion.



But this strategy doesn't always work. What if somebody asks you about your job and you are not sure how to describe it in English? You certainly cannot say, "I am not sure." However, you can say, "Let me think about how to say it in English. In the meantime, why don't you tell me about your job?"





Scenario three: What should you do if you don't understand the question? Those moments can be embarrassing.



First of all, don't panic. And secondly, don't pretend you understand the question. You can ask the speaker to repeat the question or speak more slowly.



a) "I am sorry, could you please repeat the question?"



b) "Could you say that again more slowly?"



c) "I didn't quite catch that. Could you say that again?"



d) "I am not sure I understood your question. Could you rephrase it?"



Sometimes, I hear people say, "say that again?" or "one more time please". "Say that again?" is very casual and informal and shouldn't be used at the workplace, unless you and your co-worker are more like friends. You should never say that to your boss or clients. "One more time please" is polite and simple. But the suggested phrases made you sound more professional.





Thank you for listening.

Script:



Episode 27 - How to sound smarter at work by using 'smart' words



Hello everyone, how are you? This week, I want to teach you how to sound smarter at work by using more professional words.



Here are some suggestions.



1. Substitute "okay, no problem" with other phrases.



We often say "okay, no problem" when we agree to a request. It is fine when you are talking to your friends or family members. It is not rude to reply to your boss, co-worker or clients with, "okay, no problem" when they ask you to do something. However, it will make you sound more sophisticated when you use different words and phrases. Here are some suggestions:



"Certainly", or you can say, "certainly, I will get right on it."

"I will be happy to take care of that for you."

"Absolutely. When do you need it done by?"

"Consider it done. Is there anything else I can help you with?"



Note that the words "certainly" and "absolutely" are interchangeable. So you can say, "absolutely, I will get right on it".



2. Use the word "modify" instead of "change". For example, at a work meeting, somebody says, "we need to change the way we deal with customers". The word 'change' makes it sound like you need to change everything and nobody likes to make changes. Use the word "modify" instead. It means the same thing but sounds less drastic. Drastic means extreme and serious.



3. Say "sensational" instead of "awesome", or "amazing" or "great". These three words are being overused.



4. Ask the speaker to "elaborate" instead of saying "what do you mean?", or "I don't understand what you are saying" when somebody says something that you do not understand. It is less casual and more professional. You can say, "can you elaborate it a little?"



5. Substitute "confused" and "confusing" with "perplexed" or "perplexing".

Examples: I am perplexed.

This situation is perplexing.



6. Avoid using the word "like" too often. Some people use this word 3 times in one sentence. Substitute with "such as", or "for instance".



Example, "This client is very difficult. You have to be careful with him, like when you go for a meeting, make sure you are 5 minutes early". Instead of saying "like if you go for a meeting", you can say, "such as" or "for instance, when you go for a meeting.."



7. "Exactly" is another word that people may overuse. You can say, "yes, that's so true", "yes, you are right," "that's exactly how I feel", or "you are spot on" to substitute "exactly".



I hope these tips will help you. Thank you for listening.

Script:

Episode 26: How to deal with gossips



A gossip is a rumor or a report of somebody, usually something bad. The conversation usually starts with, "Oh my God, did you hear...?" Gossips happen at work and at social gatherings.



Why do people gossip? People gossip for a variety of reasons, which can be both positive and negative. On the positive side, gossiping can help people build and maintain social connections by sharing information and stories about others. It can also provide a way for people to bond over shared experiences or even serve as a form of entertainment.



However, gossiping can also be used as a means of social control. People may spread rumors or negative information about others to damage their reputation, or it can serve as a way to make people feel superior by having exclusive information into other people's lives. If you are uncomfortable about gossiping, how do you politely ask somebody to stop talking badly about somebody else?



1. Change the topic. When somebody says to you, "Did you hear what she did yesterday?" You know the next thing that she says will be some kind of gossip or rumor. If you don't want to participate in a gossip or rumor, you can say, "no", and then immediately follow by saying something totally different, such as,

"Have you started watching that new TV show?", or "how are your kids?", or "how's the new project going?"

You make it clear you are not interested in the gossip, and want to move on to another topic. If that doesn't work, and the person is persistent in gossiping, then you can try the following strategy.



2. Shut it down. Simply be honest. Tell the person that you are not comfortable talking about somebody else when they are not here. You can even say,

"I am not really into gossip." You can ask to change the topic by saying, "Do you mind if we talk about something else?" or "Do you mind if you change the subject?"

It is good to be honest.

Thank you for listening.

Script:


Episode 25 How to sound professional on the phone – common telephone conversations and phrases

Speaking on the phone in English can be nerve-racking for English students.  Nerve-racking means causing stress or anxiety.  You already feel nervous speaking English, and speaking in English on the phone makes you even more nervous. First of all, speak clearly and slowly. Enunciate your words, and avoid mumbling or speaking too fast. Enunciate means to pronounce clearly.  The second tip is to listen carefully.  If you cannot hear or catch what the other person
is saying, don’t panic. Ask the person to repeat, by saying, “I am sorry.  I didn’t quite catch that.  Could you repeat what you just said?”

Use appropriate language and be respectful.   

Here are some essential phrases.

1.    When you are answering a call for work, state your name and company name.  For example, “This is Audrey from ABC company. How can I help you?”  or you can state the department where you are working in. “This is Audrey in the Accounting Department.  How can I help you?”

 2.    If you are the one making the call, say, “this is Audrey calling from ABC company.  I am calling about..  ( you state the reason why you are
calling).  If you know the person that you are calling, maybe you speak to her regularly, you can speak less formally.  You can say, “Hey, it is Audrey over at ABC Company… I just want to… ( and you state the reason why you are calling).

 3.    You are asking to speak to someone specific on the phone. Example, “Hi, this is Audrey from ABC company.  May I speak with Laura?” or you can say “Is Laura available? “.

 If it is not important who you want to speak to, but you need to speak to somebody inside a specific department, you can ask, for example, “could you connect me with someone in the Accounting Department?”

4.    When you are answering a call and you need to put someone on hold because you are searching for information, or you are looking for the person, or you are simply too nervous and need to calm down and think about what to say, here are some phrases to say when putting someone on hold. 
“May I put you on hold?”, “Could I ask you to hold for a moment?” “Would you mind holding for a moment?”

I hope these phrases help.