Coaching for Leaders Dave Stachowiak

Mitch Warner: Leadership and Self-Deception

Mitch Warner is a managing partner of the Arbinger Institute. The Institute has authored three best-selling books and helps leaders transform their organizations by enabling the fundamental shift in mindset that leads to exceptional results. Now in its fourth edition, Leadership and Self-Deception: The Secret to Transforming Relationships & Unleashing Results*, is today one of the top fifty best-selling leadership books of all time.



Shifting behavior in a sustainable way requires us to change our mindset. In this conversation, Mitch and I explore how self-deception gets in our way and how we can take the first step by seeing others as people.

Key Points



In many cases, we are the carriers of the very problems we are complaining about. We often resist this reality.

We often assume we aren’t the cause of problems because of our good intentions.

Mindset drives our behaviors and the effectiveness and influence of those behaviors.

Seeing someone as less than a person causes us to see the world in a way that justifies our judgement.

Too often, conflicts manifest as people provoking another’s behavior in order to justify themselves.

Our own justification is an indicator that we may be wrong to being with.

Viewing others as either better or worse than ourselves creates justification that prevents awareness and change.

Get outside of yourself by meeting to learn about them. If the relationship has been strained, consider meeting to give.



Resources Mentioned



Leadership and Self-Deception: The Secret to Transforming Relationships & Unleashing Results* by The Arbinger Institute

The Arbinger Institute



Interview Notes

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José Antonio Bowen: Teaching With AI

José Antonio Bowen has won teaching awards at Stanford and Georgetown and is past president of Goucher College. He has written over 100 scholarly articles and has appeared as a musician with Stan Getz, Bobby McFerrin, and others. He is the author of multiple books in higher education and is a senior fellow for the American Association of Colleges and Universities. He is the author with C. Edward Watson of Teaching With AI: A Practical Guide to a New Era of Human Learning*.



AI will change how we work, but it’s also going to change how we think. In this conversation, José and I explore where to begin working with AI and why those who can use it will serve a critical role in shaping what’s next.

Key Points



Physical maps make you smarter than GPS, but GPS is more practical for daily use. AI isn’t inherently good or bad, but like the internet, it will change how we work.

AI will eliminate some jobs, but it will change every job. Those who can work with AI will replace those who can’t.

Rather than thinking about creativity through the lens of responses from AI, focus on bringing creativity into your prompts.

Most of the AI progress for companies is coming from non-tech folks that are figuring out how specific tasks get more efficient.

AI is very good at some things and not good at others. You’ll discover how this relates to your work by experimenting with different prompts.



Resources Mentioned



Teaching With AI: A Practical Guide to a New Era of Human Learning* by José Antonio Bowen and C. Edward Watson

Example AI Prompts by José Antonio Bowen

The Human Side of Generative AI: Creating a Path to Productivity by Aaron De Smet, Sandra Durth, Bryan Hancock, Marino Mugayar-Baldocchi, and Angelika Reich

Moderna and OpenAI partner to Accelerate the Development of Life-Saving Treatments

The State of AI in Early 2024: Gen AI Adoption Spikes and Starts to Generate Value by Alex Singla, Alexander Sukharevsky, Lareina Yee, Michael Chui, and Bryce Hall



Interview Notes

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Make Your Reading More Meaningful, with Sönke Ahrens (episode 564)

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Will Guidara: Unreasonable Hospitality

Will Guidara is the former co-owner of Eleven Madison Park, which under his leadership received four stars from the New York Times, three Michelin stars, and in 2017 was named #1 on the list of the World’s 50 Best Restaurants. He has co-authored four cookbooks, was named one of Crain's New York Business's 40 Under 40, and is the recipient of WSJ Magazine's Innovator Award. He is the author of Unreasonable Hospitality: The Remarkable Power of Giving People More Than They Expect*.



We expect hospitality from a restaurant or hotel, but we often miss opportunities for this mindset at work. In this conversation, Will and I discuss effective leadership as an act of hospitality, not only for the organization and team — but for the leader themselves.

Key Points



Service is black and white. Hospitality is color.

Hospitality elevates service not only for the person receiving it, but for the person delivering it.

Hospitality is a dialogue, not a monologue. With employees, this means giving feedback continuously.

When offering criticism, make a charitable assumption. The message is still the message, but the context matters.

Giving attention to your top performers does a lot to invest others in their work.

Make it cool to care.



Resources Mentioned



Unreasonable Hospitality: The Remarkable Power of Giving People More Than They Expect* by Will Guidara



Interview Notes

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How to Lead Part-Time Staff, with Chris Deferio (episode 289)

Five Steps to Hold People Accountable, with Jonathan Raymond (episode 306)

The Mindset to Help Your Organization Grow, with Tiffani Bova (episode 633)



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Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

Roy Schwartz: Smart Brevity

Roy Schwartz is co-founder and CEO at Axios HQ, the world’s first AI-powered internal communications management platform. He’s also the co-founder of Axios, the award-winning news organization known for its Smart Brevity writing style. He's the co-author, along with Jim VandeHei and Mike Allen of Smart Brevity: The Power of Saying More With Less*.



Most organizations spend way more time and strategy on external communications than internal ones. In this conversation, Roy and I discuss how your internal strategy can reduce email, save time, and create space for innovation and insight.

Key Points



An effective, internal publication via email reduces the amount of total messaging people receive.

Position one, big item in every publication. There should be a hierarchy of what’s important, since not everyone will read everything.

Keep each topic to 200 words and under 1,000 words for the entire publication.

For each topic, start with a strong, first sentence — and then provide context for why it matters.

Find a word other than “newsletter” to name a regular, internal publication.

Bring personality and smiles into internal publications. People will engage and look forward to reading.

Done well, internal publications help inform, recognize, provide accountability, and allow leaders to focus on the human aspects of communication.



Resources Mentioned



Smart Brevity: The Power of Saying More With Less* by Jim VandeHei, Mike Allen, and Roy Schwartz

Axios HQ: AI-powered newsletter software



Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes



The Way to Make Sense to Others, with Tom Henschel (episode 518)

Getting Better at Reading the Room, with Kirstin Ferguson (episode 651)

Get People Reading What You’re Sending, with Todd Rogers (episode 666)



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Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

Laure Arron: Who Has Your Back?

Laurie Arron is the founder of Arron Coaching, LLC and trusted adviser and executive coach to C-suite executives and Chiefs of Staff. She spent 30+ years climbing the corporate ladder at a Fortune 10 company in sales leadership, strategic planning, business transformation, and Chief of Staff roles. She is the author of Who Has Your Back?: A Leaders's Guide to Getting the Support You Need from the Chief of Staff You Deserve.



Executive leaders need both truth-tellers and those who can manage on their behalf. Increasingly, the Chief of Staff role is becoming more prominent. In this episode, Laurie and I discuss their role, where they add value, and how they benefit the entire team.

Key Points



The Chief of Staff role has become a more prevalent executive role, especially in the technology, finance, and healthcare industries.

A Chief of Staff is distinct from an executive assistant. A effective Chief represents the leader, manages on their behalf, and coordinates their work.

Every top leader needs a truth teller. A key role of the Chief of Staff is to be up-front with the person they serve.

An effective Chief is proactive in addressing issues before the leader ever knows about them. They know where messages are being lost or diluted.

Ideally, the Chief of Staff helps create a climate of free expression throughout the team.



Resources Mentioned



Who Has Your Back?: A Leaders's Guide to Getting the Support You Need from the Chief of Staff You Deserve by Laurie Arron

Let Bartlet Be Bartlet from The West Wing



Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

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How to Help People Speak Truth to Power, with Megan Reitz (episode 597)

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Ty Wiggins: The New CEO

Ty Wiggins is a leadership expert who is passionate about setting up new CEOs for success. As the global lead of Russell Reynolds Associates’ CEO & Executive Transition Practice, he helps world-leading CEOs successfully transition into their roles, guiding them through their first 12-18 months as their trusted advisor. He is the author of The New CEO: Lessons from CEOs on How to Start Well and Perform Quickly (Minus the Common Mistakes)*.



Taking on a top job is unique in many ways. In this conversation, Ty and I explore what new, top leaders can do to get out of the bubble and hear more truth. Plus, we discuss why the first 90 or 100 days might not be the best metric for top leaders, and how to better start with easy wins and early moves.

Key Points



You’ll see more in the top job, but hear less. This is even more pronounced for those promoted internally.

Getting out of the bubble means spending more time with middle managers and front-line employees. Second and third time CEOs do this more from the start.

Key questions that can help you hear more: (1) Tell me some of the workarounds you have in place and (2) What's the question I haven't asked you but I should?

The first 90 or 100 days as a success metric is often overstated in top jobs. You’re often still learning context at an exponential rate.

If it’s on fire, fix it. If it is smold­ering, leave it alone until you have more context.

It’s helpful to address common pain points for easy wins. They don't have to be enormous, but they should be deliberate.



Resources Mentioned



The New CEO: Lessons from CEOs on How to Start Well and Perform Quickly (Minus the Common Mistakes)* by Ty Wiggins



Interview Notes

Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

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How to Genuinely Show Up for Others, with Marshall Goldsmith (episode 590)

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Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.