From Holley, With Love Holley M. Kholi-Murchison

Reflections on taking ourselves more seriously.


This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fhwl.substack.com

This month we talk the return of FHWL and what that actually means, lol.
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This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fhwl.substack.com

On my heart this week.
🕸️ dusts cobwebs from the screen 🕸️
Hey, beautiful people 👋🏾! Yesterday marked the one-year anniversary of From Holley, With Love on Substack 🥳🎊🥂. Thank you for choosing to commune here with me!
I’m back after a slightly abrupt but much-needed spring hiatus. A lotttttt has transpired since March. I took my propensity for doing the most to new heights and the message waiting for me when I realized I was in the exhausting pattern of overachieving again was — “stop collecting things to do and make yourself at home.”
In this edition’s micropodcast (press play up top ☝🏾 to listen), I share more about my time away and what it taught me about finding focus, relational integrity, minding my business, and what it means to make myself at home. I’ve been clearing my plate to settle in and tend to the places calling me to do that the most like…
* Our budding homestead here in Winston Salem. The summer garden is in bloom and we’re praying for a fruitful harvest. We’ve got some design and renovation projects in the works, too.
* Non-client-facing creative projects that I’ve put on the back burner for far too long like my MSc coursework and venturing into TV with a docuseries I’m developing.
* Relationships with my Beloveds! That means more trips to visit them and break bread, kiking on the phone for hours, and enriching moments of deep vulnerability.
* This space, here, with you. I’d like to show up more consistently and better manage things falling through the cracks. So, I got myself organized and created an editorial calendar and project plan through the end of September that’ll help me stick to a biweekly cadence.
How y’all been? What’s calling you to make yourself at home right now?
Come talk to me in the comments (or in my inbox), I’d love to hear from you.
Gifts for your growth.
* 🌱 Some of you are new here and some of you have been kickin’ it for a few months or more ( 👋🏾💐 and thank you!). Either way, I’m dreaming up new ways to tell stories that add a little value to your world through this publication, and I’d love to get to know you better. Got a few minutes to answer a short survey about FHWL? If so, click here.
* 📖 Back in March I did an interview with Authority Magazine for their “5 Things I Wish Someone Told Me Before I Began Leading My Company” series. It was a couple of weeks before the 7-year anniversary of my creative studio, and it felt amazing to reflect on and share what got us here.
* 📺 Esther Perel’s CreativeMornings talk is one of my favorites. She shares her lens on how relational intelligence can guide us in nurturing our well-being and success both at home and work. I’ve been ruminating on this one for a while.
Fuel for the week ahead.
* 🍿Can we talk about Everything Everywhere All at Once for a second? IT’S. SO. GOOD. The best movie I’ve seen in a while. I’m still thinking about it weeks later. If you haven’t had a chance to see it yet, watch it in theaters, if you can.
* In celebration of Juneteenth earlier this month, I connected with Black entrepreneurs on the Upwork platform in a conversation about freedom, interdependence, and the future of work. And I got to share some reflections on work, time, and meaning-making. You can watch the sneak peek below and check out the full discussion here.
* I’ve been sitting with this edition’s Seven Bops playlist since April. It’s a sexy, sultry, watery vibe that I really enjoy losing myself in. I hope y’all do, too. Listen to it on Apple Music or Spotify.
See you in July ❤️,
HMKM


This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fhwl.substack.com

On my heart this week.
Monday I submitted my answers for an upcoming magazine interview and one of the questions was: Which tips would you recommend to your colleagues in your industry to help them to thrive and not “burn out”?
We’ve been down that road here in FHWL before and the first thing that came to mind was that the best way to thrive and not burn out is to remember that we are not workers, labor, talent, we’re human. Life gives work meaning. So instead of rehashing old guidance, I phoned an ancestor — Toni Morrison. In my response I shared an excerpt from her 2017 essay, The Work You Do, the Person You Are. Recounting advice from a conversation with her father about a troublesome job, she wrote: 
1. Whatever the work is, do it well—not for the boss but for yourself.2. You make the job; it doesn’t make you.3. Your real life is with us, your family.4. You are not the work you do; you are the person you are.
As I wrap up my yearlong stint as Creative Researcher-in-Residence at WeTransfer, get back into dissertation writing mode, and prepare for the next big leaps in my career, Morrison’s prose is heavy on my heart this week. So much so that in lieu of one of my normal reflections, in this edition’s micropodcast (press play up top to listen ☝🏾), I read the full piece aloud so we can chew on it together.
Give it a read (link below) and meet me in the comments or my inbo with your thoughts!
Gifts for your growth.
* 💎 Here’s the Toni Morrison piece I referenced above and in the micropodcast.
* 💡 My good friend and all around gem of a human, Alice Grandoit-Sutka, sat down with the Creative Independent to discuss “defining your social practice, making time for what you want to do, the value of print media, and learning through ritual and repetition.” Read the full convo here.
Fuel for the week ahead.
* 🕺🏿💃 This Iman Shumpert and Daniella Karagach performance from Dancing With the Stars lives rent-free in my head. I don’t know Iman personally but I adore the way he centers interdisciplinarity in his pursuits. Not solely husband…or father…or rapper…or athlete and NBA champion…or clothing designer…or entrepreneur — but all of those “titles” (and more) at once.
* 🎧 🎶 I’ve been carving out a lot more intentional time for music discovery lately and this installment of Seven Bops is a sweet little genre mashup. Listen to it on Apple Music or Spotify.
See y’all in two weeks for the next edition!
Love always,
HMKM


This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fhwl.substack.com

On my heart this week.
“If one advances confidently in the direction of their dreams, and endeavors to live the life which they’ve imagined, they will meet with a success unexpected in common hours." —  Henry David Thoreau
I’ve been reciting this quote aloud for the past couple weeks. Letting it make a home in my body, in my heart. Especially in light of Dad’s near death experience with COVID.
Though sometimes jarring AF, it’s interesting how grounding the idea of endings can be. You know they’re coming…but you don’t when…and then one day you’re reminded that it could be any day now. It reorients you to what’s really important. Makes it simple to separate the urgent from the trivial. Lights a fire under your ass. Challenges you to consider what it’ll take to advance confidently in the direction of your dreams.
I’m in the thick of that challenge now and it has me unpacking three big questions:
* What am I doing with my time and where am I placing my bets?
* Are those bets worth the wager?
* How do I gracefully close the chapter(s) on the ones that aren’t?
In this edition’s micropodcast (press play up top to listen☝🏾), in the spirit of telling the most honest stories I can, I share more about how I’m answering those questions, what’s coming up for me in the process and how I’m channeling the courage to bet on myself.
What about y’all — how are you betting on yourselves this week, month, year?
Meet me in the comments and let’s talk about it!
Gifts for your growth.
* Getting to work on projects with my life partner is such a blessing. Today our new Skillshare Chroma Course launches and there’s still a few seats left. Over the next 4 weeks we’ll guide a cohort of creators through the process of moving from idea to execution. It includes weekly live sessions, individualized feedback, and a Slack community to problem solve with.
* Mailchimp teamed up with Kin to put together this really dope digital magazine called Bloom Season to “help entrepreneurs of color realize their ambitions and rewrite the blueprint for small business success.”
Fuel for the week ahead.
* ❤️ Me and Kholi chopped it up about love on the latest ep of our boo Katie’s podcast. We got into all the different layers of our relationship as married business partners, moving from codependency to interdependency, and how + why we continue to make a way. Listen on Apple or Spotify.
* 💐 Paper Monday recently released a short story experience called Halfway North and it’s so damn gorgeous and inspiring. I’ve been texting the link to the homies since I saw it so you know I had to share it with y’all, too. Check it out.
* 🎧 🎶 Seven Bops playlist is back! Sticking with the theme of betting on yourself, this one is curated to put a battery in your back in any moments when you find yourself doubting your gifts or calling. Listen to it on Apple or Spotify.
Wishing y’all an abundant week ahead.
See you in two weeks for the next edition!
Love always,
HMKM


This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fhwl.substack.com

On my heart this week.
Whew. I lost myself quite a few times over the past eight weeks but I’m finally out of the woods and it’s so good to be back, y’all.
The last time we spoke in October, I told you about my decision to defer my graduate school studies. That choice gave me some much needed breathing room and the space to slow down and establish a healthier, more sustainable life pace.
The thing is — I didn’t breathe deeply or slow down much at all. In fact, I did quite the opposite. I accelerated. PEDAL TO THE FLO 🏎️. A week after I deferred, I went to Amsterdam to visit my colleagues at WeTransfer and regroup on a big endeavor we’re conjuring.
While I was in town, I did the absolute most. Across four days, I had 20-ish meetings, coaching calls, lunch catchups, ideation & strategy sessions, and my first solo presentation at the company All Hands. Mix that with jet lag, minimal hydration, late nights romancing the city and no exercise, and you’ve got yourself the perfect recipe for burnout. And burn out I did. I was a wreck.⁣
In the FHWL survey, many of you asked that I share more about my growing pains and ins and outs of my creative practice. So, this week on the micropodcast (press play up top ☝🏾 to listen), I shed light on my run-in with burnout, the road to recovery, the clarity stillness is bringing me and how I’m shifting my habits to operationalize my life.
I’d love to hear from y’all on this, too.
How have you avoided, navigated or recovered from burnout? And how are you designing the life that you want?
Meet me in the comments and let’s talk about it!
P.S. — Going forward, I’ll be publishing the FHWL newsletter biweekly instead of every Monday. The next edition will be in your inbox on January 3, 2022 ❤️.
Gifts for your growth.
* I was talking to my friend Wes today about betting on myself and my ideas more. PRAXIS. is one I’ve been sitting on for a few months. I shared this image for it on IG the other day:
Through a combo of lightning talks & special guest interviews, hot seat coaching, intimate breakout rooms and moderated Q&A, I designed it for us to do more of what we did as children: get messy, ask questions, get feedback, show & tell, throw ideas on a wall, take them apart, see what sticks and grow without fear of ridicule or failure.⁣If you’re not on holiday break yet, and you’re interested in getting strategic guidance on your career and creative growth while co-working and moving ideas forward in a nurturing environment, click this link to come practice with me. And use the code FHWL for 25% off 🎁.
* While we’re on the subject of burnout this week, here’s a convo I filmed with Skillshare that’s applicable for not only entrepreneurs but anyone who works.
* ⚡This blog post (thanks, Malori!) about the four energy zones helped me rethink what my days look like and how I’m devoting time.
Fuel for the week ahead.
* ✨ Moses Sumney’s new album Blackalachia released earlier this month with a full-length live conceptual performance film. It’s breathtakingly good and premiered on WePresent with a beautiful interview by Doreen St. Félix.
* ✌🏾I love reading and hearing stories about why people quit jobs. No Sugar, No Cream magazine has an interview series on the theme and this one with Ashley Johnson is a great read.
* 🎧 🎶 One more playlist to round out the year. You can find this week’s Seven Bops on Apple Music or Spotify.
Wishing y’all an abundant week ahead and a satiating wrap to 2021.
See you in the new year!
Love always,
HMKM


This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit fhwl.substack.com