Bite Your Tongue: The Podcast Bite Your Tongue

This episode dives deep into resilience.  We talk to a resilience expert and parenting coach about how to build resilience - in ourselves and our adult children.

Why do we sometimes look at the bad and forget to remember and be grateful for the positive?  Our guests explain that neuroscience tells us that we are programmed to look at the negative and much more difficult to remind ourselves of the positives. 

We discuss the  process that involves building our resilience muscles, such as positivity, confidence, and creativity.  Our guests are Linda Hoopes, founder of the Resilience Alliance , a licensed psychologist whose professional work focuses on resilience.   Joining Linda is Kris Burbank, a parenting coach for all stages of life to enhance their skills as professionals, parents, and partners. Together they co-authored the book, Embracing Another Normal: Resilience Stories and Strategies for Raising Children with Disabilities.

Though originally targeted for parents of families with children with disabilities, the book has grabbed the attention of all parents struggling to find their strength in parenting as their children move through life into young adulthood.

Their book begins with this quote from Winnie the Pooh to Christopher Robin:
“Promise me you’ll always remember.  That you’re braver than you believe and stronger than you seem.  And smarter than you know.”  
 
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.  Send your thoughts to biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support us with a donation as little as $5 (purchasing a “virtual” cup of coffee).  Or joining our squad with a year's membership as low as $5 per month.  Link here now:  SUPPORT US.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Maybe you've recently read these headlines in the New York Times or The Wall Street Journal.


"Well Into Adulthood and Still Getting Money From Their Parents.   Nearly 60% of parents provide financial help to their adult kids, a new study finds." WSJ"Parents Are Highly Involved in Their Adult Children’s Lives, and Fine With ItNew surveys show that today’s intensive parenting has benefits, not just risks, and most young adults seem happy with it, too." (NYT)What you didn't know is that these articles  just covered a small bit of the extensive 2024 Pew Research study titled Parents, Young Adult Children and the Transition to Adulthood. The Pew Research Center is a non-partisan "fact tank" that helps inform the public about issues, attitudes and trends shaping our world. 


Today, we go behind the scenes to chat with one of the lead researchers on the study, Rachel Minkin and uncover what those big headlines really mean.   

We sort through the data helping listeners understand the stats and what the study really explores.  

Tune in to learn more about key milestones for young adults today vs. 30 years ago, financial help and independence in young adulthood, how parents really think their kids are doing, relationships, advice and even living together (you will be surprised that it works for many families.  


A big thank you to Connie Gorant fisher, our audio engineer and the look and feel of the podcast.  Send your thoughts and comments to biteyourtongue@gmail.com and we love to hear your ideas for future episodes. And follow us on Facebook and Instagram.

Thank you to those of you who already support us. With a donation of $5 you can help keep us going. Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy us a “virtual” cup of coffee or subscribe for a monthly subscription. Every bit helps. 










Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Do you have a favorite child?  Maybe you think you don't but there are things you do or say that show something different.

Today we delve into the much overlooked topic of sibling relationships.  We speak with Fern Schumer Chapman author o the book Brothers, Sisters, Strangers.  Siblings are the longest relationship we will have in our lives - and our children's.  They share our history our family and our story.  Chapman shares her personal life story that led her to write this book. 

We talk about sibling rejection and how that can lead to feelings of self-blame, questioning one's worth, and a sense of loss. Individuals may constantly ruminate on what went wrong and how they can mend the relationship, leading to a significant emotional toll. This ongoing emotional pain can be likened to a persistent toothache or a wound that refuses to heal.

Chapman shares  risk factors that may cause sibling rifts and what our role as parents we  play.  By acknowledging these risk factors and perilous turning points,  research provides valuable insights into the complexities of sibling relationships. Understanding these factors can help individuals navigate and potentially reconcile with estranged siblings.
We also identify when it is safer for siblings to separate and why. 
There is no question that sibling relationships serve as a blueprint for future relationships with friends, colleagues, and romantic partners. The qualities of tolerance, generosity, and loyalty instilled by siblings can influence how individuals navigate social interactions throughout their lives.  This episode helps us understand it all.

Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going!  Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.  You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference. 








Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

For today's episode we brought back Tony and Alisa DiLorenzo to discuss their new book "The Secret to Breaking the Conflict Cycle in Your Marriage," and to share their wisdom on maintaining strong connections in all our relationships - and that means with our adult kids too!

We talk about  the need to actively engage in conflict resolution rather than avoiding or ignoring issues. (which most of us do!)
By being intentional, individuals can identify the root causes of conflicts, understand their own triggers and reactions, and work towards constructive solutions.
Intentionality involves setting clear goals for improving communication, understanding, and connection within relationships. It requires a commitment to addressing issues head-on and seeking resolution rather than letting conflicts fester.
Some of the key points include:
Being intentional and taking actionWords have powerKnowing yourself;  addressing  your own weaknesses Understand your conflict cycleThis one's all about strengthening relationships with your spouse and your adult child.  Tune in for some valuable insights and tips! #RelationshipsMatter
Remember, it's never too late to work on your relationship and create a positive impact on your family and future generations.
Visit One Extra-Ordinary Marriage website to review and download other free tools that  you will like.  Link to Conflict Cycle Workbook.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.

Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.

Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going!  Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.  You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Today we speak with the legendary Charles Fay, Ph.D. who, with his father Jim Fay and Dr. Foster W. Cline founded Love and Logic.  For many years parents have turned to Love and Logic for guidance for their young children.  It is a trusted research-driven, whole child approach to child-rearing.
And now - guess what?  Dr. Fay is talking about how Love and Logic works for building healthy relationships with our young adult children!
We talk about their new book coming out in March 2024 that includes a chapter on young Adults.  The book is titled, “Raising Mentally Strong Kids: How to Combine the Power of Neuroscience with Love and Logic and Grow Confident, Kind, Responsible, and Resilient Children and Young Adults”, written by neuroscientist Dr. Daniel Amen and Dr. Charles Fay.
 Dr. Fay explains:
How the successful techniques  used with our toddlers and teens can now apply to our adult children. He outlines the five Steps of Empathy and how this helps free young adults to make their decisions  -- but also live with the consequences. How giving up our own control puts the power into our adult children’s hands What is the risk of setting them free? How can we set our own boundaries when needed and why it is important? By removing the chaos we create deposits into a healthier parent-adult relationship. Two important takeaways:
“We can never consistently work harder on someone else’s life than they are”“The more words I use, the more ineffective I become”.  Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.

Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.

Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going!  Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.  You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference. 


Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

In today’s episode Denise and Kirsten chat with renowned matchmaker Rachel Greenwald. Do you ever worry your adult child will never find a partner?  Do they spend too much time with their career rather than love?  Do you feel like they are always picking the wrong person?  Today we discuss whether parents should meddle in their adult child's dating life.  Greenwald offers insights about if, when, and how to navigate this tricky  issue that impacts the whole family.  We dig deep into the changing dating world that our adults are navigating. Greenwald explains the difference between a Dating Coach, a Matchmaker, and an Online Concierge.

New York Times columnist David Brooks sparked debate about that after he published his column “To Be Happy, Marriage Matters More Than Career.”  Greenwald tells us why she agrees with Brooks and how the COVID Pandemic changed dating and relationships in a positive way.  She tells us how to approach the subject with our adult children using words that are nonjudgemental.

Listen for more on:  Skills for dating today; how dating has become about gamification;  Does coming from a divorced or challenged family impact partner choices? She discusses other options for helping  your adult child in this area of their life including dating boot camps, podcasts and books.  We will share those  links in social media.

We discuss dating for seniors too!  Remember to listen to the interesting podcast Behind the Swipe, exploring issues facing men and women over 40 navigating the confusing world of online dating.

Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!

Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going!  Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.  You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference. 
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.

The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.