[Relationships] Let's stop using this dating "tactic", even though it "works", yeah? | Episode 076 The GYST of It - Anxiety and Self-Confidence Advice, Guides and Conversations

Why is it that some people are completely chilled about dating, others overanalyse every interaction and message, and there are others who seem to deliberately sabotage what seem like perfectly reasonable dating opportunities?

The answer is very simple - these different sets of people have different “attachment styles”.

Attachment is the emotional bond that forms in us in early childhood but there is also evidence to suggest that people are genetically predisposed to becoming a particular attachment style.

This emotional bond unconsciously sets out the patterns which later become the core of how our adult relationships are based - both in romance and friendship.

The 4 attachment styles are as follows:


Secure
Anxious
Avoidant
Disorganised (anxious-avoidant)

People do not have to be necessarily pigeon-holed into one style and some people’s attachment style can vary depending on the attachment style of the person with whom the relationship is with.

It is important to understand also that attachment styles are stable but plastic, this means that they will not wildly fly all over the place but also they can be trained to become more secure.

It might be the case that just by seeing the headlines of the styles you feel you know which category you fit into but let me give you the low-down on what might be typical romantic relationship traits of someone from each style.

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Find out your attachment type in 5 minutes here - https://quiz.attachmentproject.com/