Quick Hits DrRobyn

Rick Alcantara started this conversation off by saying he doesn’t think this is a valid question because they aren’t mutually exclusive. He believes you can be both naïve and cynical at the same time. Further into the conversation he mentioned the word “rational” that could be a middle ground.
 
Laura Agafitei brought in the idea of healthy skepticism. For her that means being open to learning why someone believes what they do and then analyzing those reasons in light of her own biases and beliefs. The bottom line for her was not trusting everything you see, but also give the benefit of doubt.
 
Stewart Wiggins wondered when in our lives we start to become cynical. Children aren’t cynical by nature. What causes us to become bitter (my word) as we get older?
 
For me cynicism is bitter, almost angry. Whereas, being naïve is not having any knowledge or life experience and I wasn’t sure if I agreed with Rick’s idea that you could be both and asked him to say more about it.
 
In listening back to this conversation, I decided to look at the definition of naïve. From Dictionary(dot)com: “having or showing a lack of experience, judgment, or information” 
 
Based on just that definition, Rick’s concept works.
 
Do you think cynicism and naïveté are opposites? Can you be both? What does it look like to have healthy skepticism instead?
 
Connect with the panelists:
Laura Agafitei: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laura-agafitei/
Strategy and design Consultant for the health and wellness industry. Based in Dublin.
 
Stewart Wiggins: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stewart-wiggins/
Induna Advisors – where he offers Fractional Chief Operating Officer services and Brings resources together to help scale your business.
 
Rick Alcantara: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rickalcantara/  
He does public relations, digital marketing and crisis communication at Rick Alcantara consulting
 
Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/
AKA Mental MacGyver. My doctorate is in business psychology with a concentration in high performance. I provide customized, confidential, high-performance support and coaching to executives, founders, celebrities and athletes.
 
Want a summary of Quick Hits in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/
 
#QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.MentalMacGyver.com
 

Brandon Mahoney started this conversation off by saying he uses this as a tactic to end a conflict. It allows him to feel like the better person for being willing to walk away and perhaps sacrifice to make the other person happy.
 
Chelle Shapiro agreed. She will intentionally take herself out of a conversation to keep it from escalating; particularly if the other person is really not interesting in hearing what she has to say.
 
Philip Tate commended Brandon and Chelle for being self-aware enough to recognize when they are choosing to not demand their needs be met. Further commenting that many times people subvert what they need without even realizing they are doing it.
 
I agreed that there are times when it’s not a huge deal and you can just say, “Never mind, that I need isn’t important.” But it can become a recurring habit to avoiding conflict. I wondered how do you realize, “I don’t want to fight with you AND my needs aren’t being met.”
 
I also asked this panel how they deal with situations where maybe they let something go for too long and now they are saying, “Hey this is no longer okay.” But the person they are talking to is so used to getting their way, they get angry when you set a boundary.
 
Watch to the end where I shared a story that recently happened in my life where I had to make some tough choices.
 
How do you notice when you bury your needs? Is it always a problem and what do you do about it?
 
Connect with the panelists:
Chelle Shapiro: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chelleshapiro/
Marketing Strategist for Wellness Coaches & Consultants and recognized as one of the top 15 LinkedIn experts in New York city as well as the author of the book, Loving Yourself isn’t Selfish.
 
Brandon Mahoney: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drstartup/
Co-Founder of Launch Point Labs, National venture firm where he is the expert in creating sales departments. He is known as Dr Startup and based on the west coast of the US.
 
Philip Tate: https://www.linkedin.com/in/philiptateaprfellowprsa/
He is a communications consultant doing Brand Building | Strategic Communications and Marketing based in Charlotte NC
 
Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/
AKA Mental MacGyver. My doctorate is in business psychology with a concentration in high performance. I provide customized, confidential, high-performance support and coaching to executives, founders, celebrities and athletes.
 
Want a summary of Quick Hits in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/
 
#QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.MentalMacGyver.com
 

Elissa Hecker started this conversation by saying, yes. Some bad bosses do know and they don’t care. And on the other side, there are bad bosses who don’t realize they are bad. They could be insecure, overcompensating, or want to be everyone’s friend.
 
Pascal Derrien thinks that some bad bosses are in denial. They may have become a boss as social posturing, for status reasons, and don’t really care if they are a good boss or not. Pascal says people like that aren’t managers, they are damagers.
 
He can also see the other side where a bad boss has good intent but doesn’t have the experience, training or baseline to be a good boss.
 
James Lee believes that for someone to be a really bad boss they have to not care that they are bad. He also brought in the reality that drugs and alcohol can be a major problem with bad bosses (Side note – I worked in the banking industry in the nineties and cocktail lunches were a real thing for “leaders.”)
 
I followed up with the question about what a “bad boss” actually looks like. We even talked about whether the “Covid break” has made some bosses worse because they feel like they are losing control.
 
At about the mid-point of the conversation we had a difference of opinion, some panelists thought if you are a bad person at work, you are likely a bad person at home and vice versa. Others disagreed and said that people can have from different work personalities.
 
Jim wondered if we really need as much middle management as most organizations have now.
 
This conversation could have gone a lot of different directions and we touched on a lot of things.
 
What do you think, do bad bosses know they are bad or are they clueless?
 
Connect with the panelists:
James Lee: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jleeadvisor/
He is a financial futurist at StratFI. He has 30 years’ experience in the financial word and is the author of the book, Foresight Investing:  A Complete Guide to Finding Your Next Great Trade 
 
Elissa D. Hecker: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elissa-d-hecker-48467711/
She is the Go-To General Counsel, Collaborative Partner, and Creative Problem Solver, for businesses and the Entertainment and Arts industries
 
Pascal Derrien: https://www.linkedin.com/in/pascalderrien/
CEO of the nonprofit Migraine Ireland and an avid athlete
 
Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/
AKA Mental MacGyver. My doctorate is in business psychology with a concentration in high performance. I provide customized, confidential, high-performance support and coaching to executives, founders, celebrities and athletes.
 
Want a summary of Quick Hits in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/
 
#QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.MentalMacGyver.com
 

Catarina von Maydell started us off by talking about environments that normalize “toughness” with sayings like, “If you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen.” Plus blaming and shaming – If you can’t handle it, that is your fault.
 
Rick Alcantara agreed adding that there can be a mentality of just grin and bear it because people don’t feel like they have an opportunity to go somewhere else.
 
Stewart Wiggins suggested there might be a generational component. That the younger generation is less likely to tolerate toxic work environments than they predecessors. Those in their twenties and early thirties will just pick and leave for another job. He also believes there is some complacency. “If it doesn’t harm me, it’s not a toxic work environment.”
 
Other reasons people might stay: Afraid the next place they go will be worse. Golden handcuffs – being paid so much that they can’t find another job at similar pay.
 
This is the book Catarina mentioned: What Men Don't Tell Women About Business: Opening Up the Heavily Guarded Alpha Male Playbook https://www.amazon.com/What-Dont-Women-About-Business/dp/0470145080/ref=sr_1_1
 
Do you think people who stay in toxic environments are to blame for their own situation because they stay in it?
 
Is there an option between, be quiet and keep your head down and quitting?
 
Connect with the panelists:Rick Alcantara: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rickalcantara/  
He does public relations, digital marketing and crisis communication at Rick Alcantara consulting
 
Catarina von Maydell: https://www.linkedin.com/in/catarinavonmaydell/
She helps business leaders build disruptive business models and define key leverage points to create powerful change and impact using a process of systemic, organizational, and human evolution. If you want different, lead different.
 
Stewart Wiggins: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stewart-wiggins/
Induna Advisors – where he offers Fractional Chief Operating Officer services and Brings resources together to help scale your business.
 
Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/
AKA Mental MacGyver. My doctorate is in organizational business psychology with a concentration in sport and performance. I provide customized, confidential, high-performance support and coaching to executives, founders, celebrities and athletes.
 
Want a summary of Quick Hits in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/
 
#QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.MentalMacGyver.com
 

Todd Karges started this conversation off with a yes. And adding that it is even more important for leaders to create an environment where innovation and creativity can thrive. That means allowing space for learning, outside the box thinking and failure.
 
Jennifer Watson talked about a survey that showed what employees want and need is psychological safety. The ability to screw something up and know their boss has their back and they will be welcome in the group. She also believes that it is important for a leader to be able to pull in the right people to allow that kind of environment to flourish.
 
Dr Mohan Ananda is confident that it is the founder or CEO’s responsibility to set the example. Which includes believing in growth, being willing to take calculated risks and providing support and resources. For him the answer is not only yes, it is an absolute must.
 
I wondered how much autonomy an individual leader has to create this and how much of it is determined by the overall culture of the whole organization. And further into the conversation I asked how a leader can provide guidance without squelching ideas.
 
Listen in to what this experienced panel had to say on the subject and then we would love to hear from you.
 
Do you agree that creating space for innovation and creativity is the leader’s responsibility or do the employees also need to come to the table ready to create?
 
Connect with the panelists:Jennifer Watson: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-watson-6b08b9121/
She a keynote speaker and coach helping leaders heal and accelerate their influence by optimizing Vitality, High-Frequency Leadership and Transformational Communication
 
Todd Karges: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toddkarges/
Has a background in project management and building agile development mindsets.  He is a transformation and change management practitioner and a leadership development coach. Based outside of Toronto.
 
Dr. Mohan Ananda: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mohanananda/
Scientist, lawyer, serial entrepreneur, and author of the book, Autobiography of an Immigrant. Which has been translated into multiple languages. He is passionate about helping people succeed in business
 
Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/
AKA Mental MacGyver. My doctorate is in organizational business psychology with a concentration in sport and performance. I provide customized, confidential, high-performance support and coaching to executives, founders, celebrities and athletes.
 
Want a summary of Quick Hits plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/
 
#QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.MentalMacGyver.com
 

When I was little my dad used to say, “You want fair? Go to Turlock in August.” That’s when and where the county fair was held each year. That was his way of saying life wasn’t fair and that was too bad.
 
Dr Bob Choat started our conversation off by talking about culture and how, depending on where you are and what biases you have, fair might be seen differently.
 
For Lisa Howard two words came to mind first, balanced and impartial. She then went on to add, moral, ethical, free of bias and favoritism. She believes a situation has to be looked at holistically to determine if it is fair.
 
Brett Knopf agreed, adding there is a subjectivity to it. He considered the question from a negotiation standpoint. In that case, fairness is both parties walking away satisfied.
 
I believe there is an element of expectation when it comes to fairness. In the conversation I shared a funny story of my sister explaining to her four-year-old why it was “fair” for them to split a chocolate bar one third to the toddler and two-thirds to my sister. Fair doesn’t always mean equal.
 
Another little antidote from my childhood – If I was splitting something with a sibling my mom would always have one of us cut it and the other one got to choose their half first. You have never seen such careful halving of something as me cutting something knowing my sibling would choose the larger half.
 
What do you think it means for something to be fair? Is fairness a thing in the adult world?
 
Connect with the panelists:
Lisa Howard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lhoward2/
Is the Founder of the HR consulting company, People Core Strategies. She is a trusted Business Consultant and HR Advisor - Helping companies grow through effective people strategies.   
 
Brett Knopf: https://www.linkedin.com/in/brett-knopf-5849b48/
He is a Performance Coach and Business Strategist with over two decades of experience. He empowers leaders and teams to create environments that focus on collaboration, transparency, self-accountability and personal development.
 
Dr. Bob Choat: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bobchoat/
He has eight years military experience, worked with the LA PD, he is now the founder of the Integrated Mind Institute and is going back to school for another PhD. This time in physics 
 
Dr Robyn Odegaard: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robynodegaard/
AKA Mental MacGyver. My doctorate is in organizational business psychology with a concentration in sport and performance. I provide luxury level, high performance support and coaching to executives, founders, celebrities and athletes.
 
Want a summary of Quick Hits plus the links to the LinkedIn pages of each of the panelist in your in-box every week? Let me know where to send it: https://drrobynodegaard.com/quick-hits-notifications/
 
#QuickHits are designed to exercise your brain by letting you listen in on an unscripted conversation to get other people's thoughts on pertinent subjects. If you would like to join a conversation or have a topic you would like to hear discussed, please message me. https://www.MentalMacGyver.com