The Retro Podcast Massacre Val Thomas

The Retro Podcast Massacre is finished!

But here's episode 1 of the new podcast - The Big Screen Biograph!

If you liked it, please subscribe to the new show at any of the sites below...

Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-big-screen-biograph/id1554434636
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3UPwd9wrA5ewwSNuZXNLDm
Google: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5jYXB0aXZhdGUuZm0vdGhlLWJpZy1zY3JlZW4tYmlvZ3JhcGg
Amazon: https://music.amazon.co.uk/podcasts/612a4b5c-6e94-4d33-aab0-111e8fec58c6/The-Big-Screen-Biograph
Pocket Casts: https://pca.st/xmrdxmhc
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaZhNwU87TOfkBL6NWfDIBw

THIS EPISODE INCLUDES FULL SPOILERS FOR THE RING 

In this episode, Val watches as many Ring films as he can possibly stand (all but one). 

We look at the entire plot of the original Ring movie, to see how it compares to the American remake. Is the original better, or are those who claim the remake is worse just farty cinema snobs? 

No hints as to Val's opinion, but yes, totally. They are.

Val also runs through the sequels - and there are  LOT of them. From the Japanese sequels, which veer into science fiction and romance, to the American sequels which veer into... errrr... well... remakes of the first one... 

So come! Join us one last time! We promise that the rumours about this podcast being cursed are NONSENSE! And that at no point will some watery teenager emerge from your phone and kill you! 

Probably.

THIS EPISODE CONTAINS MINOR SPOILERS 

Join Val for a short episode on the little-seen, little-known, criminally-underappreciated Australian splatter comedy, "The Roly Poly Man".

A film SO obscure we could find out almost NOTHING about it. So Val does his best to explain the movie's INCREDIBLY strange plot and tells you why you NEED to track this film down!

Featuring giant Amazonian leeches, the murder of a giant TV bear, huge testicles, horny nuns. several horrible children and a horse driving a taxi, you owe it to yourselves to listen to this episode and FIND THIS FILM!

THIS EPISODE CONTAINS ONLY LIGHT SPOILERS  

Kia ora koutou, Willing Participants!  

Come to New Zealand with us, for this very Kiwi episode of The Retro Podcast Massacre!  

Val takes a look at the splatstick years of Peter Jackson, from building models and effects in his dad's shed and cooking up aliens in his mum's oven for "Bad Taste" through to bringing us debauched, filthy puppets in "Meet The Feebles" and then on to THEEEE GORIEST FILM IN THE WORLD EVAH - "Braindead" aka "Dead Alive".  

We'll be talking about drinking chunder! Cooking charity workers! Murdering puppets! Sumatran rat monkeys!  And mowing the lawn.  

So grab yourself a can of L&P, a packet of Rashuns and sit back as we take you to the Land of the Long White Cloud... and HEAPS of blood... 

Ngā Mihi, Val

WARNING: This episode contains significant spoilers for the film Halloween III.

In this episode, Val looks back on the troubled history of the film Halloween III: Season of the Witch.

It was a sequel that John Carpenter and Debra Hill didn't want to make. But they found inspiration in one of Carpenter's horror heroes - British science-fiction writer, Nigel Kneale.

In an audacious move, they decided to make a film unlike any other in the Halloween franchise. "Not a knife movie, but a pod movie," said Debra Hill.

Could they pull it off? As the production broke down in acrimony between Kneale and Carpenter, critics called it a disaster. Fans were divided. And the film has remained controversial ever since.

It's time to make the call... Halloween III - genius or BOLLOCKS?

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

In this festive episode of The Retro Podcast Massacre, Val takes you back to Edinburgh. A medieval city, where past links to the present. 

We focus on two tales from famed Scottish author Robert  Louis Stevenson - Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and The Body Snatcher. 

Val's old friend Dougal stops by for a dram or two, and to share with us the real-life inspiration for both stories. The dastardly Deacon Brodie, who lived by night as "Sir Lluyd" - a criminal who inspired Mr. Hyde, and then the murders of the original body snatchers, Burke and Hare.

Join us for this atmosphere soaked episode! Share a whisky with us and toast in the New Year!

Sláinte, Willing Participants.