Culture and Leadership Connections Podcast Marie Gervais

The Somatic Leadership Journey

Bio:
Pavini Moray has started, failed, and succeeded in many businesses. A serial entrepreneur, they have built private practices, a worker collective, and a for-profit company. Pavini is a somatic leadership coach, specializing in helping relationships be easy. Moray holds an M.Ed in Montessori curriculum design, as well as a Ph.D. in Somatic Psychology. Pavini has authored, How to Hold Power: A Somatic Approach to Becoming a Leader People Love and Respect.

Links:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pavinicoakwellmoray/
Website: https://www.pavinimoray.com/

Episode Highlights:
In this episode, Pavini delves into their experiences of cultural disconnect, sharing personal stories of their childhood and how counterculture and punk music provided a sense of belonging and freedom. They discuss the importance of somatic approaches in leadership and personal growth.

Childhood Incidents:
As a child, Pavini’s mother decided that Pavini should have a cultural education of experiencing the arts. As a single mother, cultural education was a luxury she had to prioritize and save for. Contrastingly, Pavini’s dad had season tickets and a box at the opera. One night, when mother and child were at the opera, they noticed the dad sitting in his box in the theatre which was Pavini’s first awareness of wealth disparity.

In January 1986, Pavini’s friends invited them to a punk party. While there, Pavini felt the difference between the world they lived in and the current world they were experiencing then. This experience set Pavini on a journey to find spaces of belonging.

Cultural Influences:
Pavini’s purpose comes from living a life informed by pleasure, embodiment, and communication, tempered with transparency and kindness.

Leadership Influence:
In 2008, Pavini attended an activist camp and experienced the power of transparency and power sharing along with strong organization. This shaped their foundational beliefs about leadership, elderhood and the importance of structure. To date, Pavini cannot stand being in a poorly organized meeting and strives to incorporate elderhood into leadership since it increases the capacity of an entire community.

Temperaments and Personality:
Pavini believes they came into this world as a dancer, with a sense of awe, magic and connection to nature and spirit. Curiosity is also part of Pavini’s temperament. As a child, and later as an adult Pavini developed both a playful and pragmatic side to their personality.

Cultural Epiphanies:
Pavini lived in Bulgaria in the 90s and experienced the Bulgarians' sense of powerlessness and hopelessness as shocking. Pavini recalls a time they went to the mayor asking for transportation for books that had traveled 10,000 miles around the world, and now required transportation for the last 200 miles to get them to the destination. The mayor said it was impossible, but Pavini was able to show him how doable it was when he opened his mind to possibility.

When Pavini was working with a worker collective, a sense of anger at late meetings arose frequently. One of the people they worked with told Pavini that the time intolerance and anger was white supremacy and not all people understand time the same way.

What Brings out the Best in Pavini?
Pavini enjoys working in environments where they can laugh and be playful.

Soapbox Moment:
Pavini encourages us to be attuned. They recognize how vulnerable it can be when we open ourselves to attune with someone else's needs, feelings, desires, fears, and grief. 
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What It Takes to Manage Well

Episode Highlights:
Delve into the three essential categories for effective management and self-regulation, differentiation, and high-level thought integrated throughout and responsive to operations.

Three Essential Categories for Effective Management

Self-Regulation:
Self-regulation is crucial for good decision-making. It involves recognizing and accepting your feelings. It means being aware of your feelings and thoughts and choosing not to act on them impulsively. Self-governance enables you to consider the impact of your actions leading to more thoughtful and beneficial outcomes. 
Self-awareness and self-governance: This results in the ability to manage and release unpleasant emotions safely, interpret reality accurately, and maintain a sense of calm and peace. Other awareness and empathy: With genuine self-awareness, you'll have heightened empathy and notice and understand others' feelings and experiences. Increased other awareness and empathy in the workplace is a sign of effective management.The ability to change and sustain one's habits for elevated thought and action: True self-regulation means not defining yourself by routines or limitations but continuously expanding your sense of self through learning and applying new insights to work habits. Differentiation:
Differentiation is the ability to see the separate within the whole and the whole within separate and to bring them together. It's the ability to do analysis and synthesis. 
Separation of identity from in-group and out-group bias: The ability to separate your identity from the groups you belong to is crucial in management. A strong in-group and out-group identity is necessary for a sense of belonging and security. However, it's essential to maintain a balance and not let these identities define you entirely.Being able to hold multiple points of view without attaching yourself to them: This is a sign of effective management, allowing you to make decisions based on what's best for the collective rather than your personal biases.Capacity to inspire others and be inspired: If you are inspired by others, you're likely to be more inspiring yourself.Ability to balance encouragement and challenge: It means when people are not feeling strong, you can encourage them and build them up. When they're feeling strong but not showing their best selves, you can challenge them to step up to the plate. Being able to read reality without becoming hopeless in the face of difficulty: There are a lot of challenging realities in the workplace, and people go through many difficulties. If you can read and understand these difficulties without losing hope, it's a sign of great leadership.High-level Thought Integrated Throughout and Responsive to Operations:
It's not enough to have great ideas if no one can act on them. Frequent conflicts between departments occur when high-level thought is not integrated, usually due to lack of consultation.
Have principle-based discussions that respect individual inputs: Listen with interest without getting defensive or allowing anyone to dominate.Collective decision-making that promotes honest and kind participation: Making decisions as a group where everyone is both honest and kind leads to agreed-upon solutions benefiting the whole without excluding individuals or groups.Ability to translate thought into action, reflect on the outcomes, and make adjustments: Changing your mind isn't a sign of weakness, but constantly changing it is. Making a decision and sticking to it despite negative outcomes is not a sign of strength.Support the Show.

The role of spiritual intelligence in effective leadership.

Bio:
Yosi Amram, PhD, is a distinguished psychologist, an executive coach catering to CEOs, entrepreneurs, and other influential leaders, and a pioneering researcher in the field of spiritual intelligence. Holding an MBA from Harvard University and a PhD from Sofia University in Clinical Transpersonal Psychology, Dr. Amram is committed to enabling individuals to unlock their potential through spiritual intelligence. This profound connection to the core of one’s existence – their spirit, where inspiration and deepest interconnectedness reside – enriches their overall functioning, improves their effectiveness, and enhances their well-being.

He is the author of Spiritually Intelligent Leadership: How to Inspire by Being Inspired.

Links:
Website: https://yosiamram.net/

Quotes:
“I think great leaders can also drop back and lead from behind, which is more of a facilitative role of leadership. You can think about it perhaps in terms of the yin and yang of leadership.”

Episode Highlights:
In this interview, Yosi Amram tells us how a leave of absence from his company was a blessing in disguise. The board of Yosi’s company gave him a break because they felt he needed it. Initially, Yosi felt shame for being let go from his company, but later, it provided him an opportunity to find his identity and passion in psychology.

Childhood Incidents:
When Yosi was four years old, he learned from older boys that flicking someone's legs while they're running or walking could make them trip and fall. One day, he experimented on a boy in front of him. The boy tripped, scraped his knees, and started bleeding and crying. The teacher started yelling, asking who did it, but Yosi never came forward. This experience taught him the importance of not causing pain, suffering, harm, or violence to others.

At age nine, Yosi went to a movie theatre without his parents and was molested by a stranger. This incident made him feel like there was something wrong with him, like he was damaged goods. He repressed his feelings about this experience and only addressed them in therapy when he was 40.

Influential Groups:
Yosi comes from Middle Eastern, Iraqi, and Jewish backgrounds. Middle Eastern Iraqi culture is emotionally expressive, warm, and highly hospitable. In contrast, Jewish culture emphasizes Socratic methods of debate for truth's sake and taking responsibility seriously.

Cultural Influences:
As Yosi grew older, his interest in spirituality deepened. He joined various spiritual communities, including Jewish Renewal, Buddhist communities, and a particular path called the Diamond Approach, which emphasizes inquiry and a love for truth. All these communities highlighted the importance of service.

Cultural Epiphanies:
When Yosi moved to the US, he experienced culture shock; people valued personal space and privacy, which was not the case in Tel Aviv or the Middle East in general. He grew up in a one-bedroom house with his grandparents and parents.

What Brings Out the Best in Yosi?
Yosi believes in directness and honesty. He values relationships where people are honest, open, and direct, built on a foundation of kindness and positive regard. He also appreciates regular mutual feedback to keep relationships clear and clean.

Soapbox Moment:
Yosi encourages everyone interested in becoming more empowered and inspired leaders to check out his book, Spiritually Intelligent Leadership: How to Inspire by Being Inspired.
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 Is This Soul Enhancing or Soul Diminishing?

Imagine bringing your whole self to an action informed by purpose

Episode Highlights:
Today we delve into the concept of building a sense of purpose using the principle of choosing soul enhancing versus soul diminishing actions in our work behaviour. This episode equips you with tips to increase a sense of purpose at work, while providing you with a tool to autocorrect when you fall short of the ideal.

Getting to the Bridge of encouragement:
The first question to ask yourself is, “Is this soul diminishing or soul enhancing?” Take an instance of a workplace where people are always gossiping. What does that do to the soul? It diminishes the soul and destroys positive company culture. Employees don't feel they can be their authentic selves, fearing they will be attacked. They can't admit to mistakes because they anticipate punishment.

In a soul-enhancing workplace, people encourage each other. They're clear about expectations, communications, and they operate transparently. They think about ways they can help each other, be kind to each other, and progress within the organization. When there's a mistake, they can talk openly about it because they know they will not be punished for bringing it up.

Soul Enhancing versus Soul Diminishing Attitudes, Actions, And Outcomes:
Soul enhancing is encouraging, expansive, joyful, creative, and love-promoting. Increasing soul-enhancing behaviours develops virtues—positive qualities admired across cultures such as kindness, helpfulness, courage, and wisdom.

Soul diminishing is discouraging, constrictive, oppressive, and hate-promoting. Increasing soul-diminishing behaviours develops vices—the negative qualities that destroy cultures such as aggression, violence, hatred, superiority, and self-centredness.

The Essence of Controlling Your Anger:
A Buddhist saying is: “The monk who subdues his arisen anger sloughs off as a snake its decrepit old skin.”

Learning to align our emotions and desires with principles that help us engage in soul-enhancing actions can be extremely useful, not only for work but also for our interpersonal relations and other activities outside of work. The more we practice orienting ourselves towards making soul-enhancing thoughts, words and deeds, the more workplaces will reflect virtues, qualities, and powers that make work increasingly pleasant and enjoyable.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:
Purpose is inspiring but has both a light and dark side. You choose the side you want. To choose a purpose that nurtures your light side, opt to develop virtues rather than vices which are soul diminishing.You can ask either in the moment or later in reflection, “Is that/was that…soul enhancing or soul diminishing?”When you fall short of soul-enhancing thoughts, words, and actions, the answer is to forgive yourself and move forward through service, which is like prayer—it helps us autocorrect.If you’re finding these episodes helpful, you can purchase the book, The Spirit of Work, Timeless Wisdom, Current Realities, online at Amazon, Barnes &  Noble, or directly from my website.
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How can purposeful growth impact your leadership?

Bio:
Mark A. Mears is a #1 Best Selling author, keynote speaker, consultant, and visionary business leader. He has a significant track record of building stakeholder value, driving innovation, and profitable growth among world-class, high-profile brands such as PepsiCo/Pizza Hut, McDonald’s, and The Cheesecake Factory among others.

Today, Mark is the Chief Growth Officer for LEAF Growth Ventures and has just released his new book titled, The Purposeful Growth Revolution: 4 Ways to Grow from Leader to Legacy Builder.

Links:
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markamears/
Website: https://www.markamears.com/

Quotes:
“When we do things randomly, they don't stick. But if we do things intentionally over and over, it forms like wet cement. It hardens and it becomes a habit. In this case, a positive habit.”

“Leadership is like the seed of an organization and the root system. You must have a strong root system for any plant or tree to grow.”

Episode Highlights:
In this insightful conversation, Mark shares about purposeful growth and the importance of feeling loved in the workplace, breaking down the concept of love into an inspiring acronym. He shares his experiences, upbringing, and professional journey, imparting valuable wisdom on leadership, community, and the power of feedback. He also shares how being fired from a C-Suite job was a gift in disguise for him.

Childhood Incidents:
Growing up, Mark was an avid swimmer. He had a coach who helped him achieve excellence through hard workouts, and he became a lifeguard and swim coach in high school. Mark put his best foot forward and as a result, became head guard responsible for managing the pool. That experience hones his love for leadership, service, and hospitality.

Influential Groups/Cultural Influence:
Mark sees culture as a set of norms and expectations that people establish amongst themselves as a natural course of interaction. He recalls growing up in the swim team. He was always with his teammates during practice; they carpooled to practice and had bus rides together. Church and college also influenced Mark, giving him a sense of belonging.

Mark has worked for and with many organizations, and his greatest desire has always been to leave the place better than he found it. His experience with various groups taught Mark how to leverage his God-given gifts, talents, abilities, intellect, and experiences to bring organizations to ever-higher levels of excellence.

Personality and Temperaments:
As a child, Mark was passionate and competitive. He was curious and had the resilience to overcome obstacles in his life, which is an enduring trait. Today, Mark has become softer on the competitiveness side and more forgiving of himself. He has learned how to take the best of his core characteristics, round off some rougher edges, and grow new ones.

Cultural Epiphanies:
In Mark’s last leadership position, someone called him a narcissist. It was difficult for Mark to understand where it came from, and he later realized that what he viewed as selflessness was seen as grand-standing by others.

What Brings out the Best in Mark?
Mark lights up like a Christmas tree when he helps align a team. Their increased unity allows them to accomplish more than they even thought possible.

Soapbox Moment:
Are you interested in purposeful growth? Mark invites you to visit his website for a self-assessment to experience the power of his acronym for LOVE: Listen, Observe, Value, and Empower.
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Resistance means you don’t feel safe.
Quotes:
“The reason people resist is because they don’t feel safe."

“Courtesy is the first sign of safety. Respect is the outcome of courteous behaviour.”

“When working with colleagues or bosses work to create a matrix of safety for the head, the body, the heart, the spirit and the culture.”

Episode Highlights:
Part A – Your nervous system and its relationship to feeling safe

Your amygdala is responsible for perception of threat, even if that threat is not real. When there is a perception of threat, the body reacts via the amygdala in an instant freeze, fight, flight response. The remedy to threat is to create a safe work environment.

Part B – How to create safety for yourself 
Start with an incident that is bothering you: “When I think about X situation…I feel (what emotion?) (angry, frustrated etc.)”Measure the intensity of the emotion from 1-10.Slow down your breathing and become conscious of where you feel this emotion in your body.Move to release the energy.Part C – Intentionally creating a climate of safety
Creating a workplace matrix is similar to the matrix in the womb that surrounds and nourishes a baby. You can help create this matrix of safety by:

Helping the head feel safe – give it an explanation and facilitate regular communication of listening, speaking and coming to a shared understanding

Helping the body feel safe – is it pleasant to work in this place, is it ergonomically viable? Would you want to work there? If you wouldn’t why would you allow others to work in that condition?

Helping the heart feel safe – listening, acknowledging, validating how other people feel. Acknowledge difference of opinion without vilification of the other person.

Treat others with courtesy and civility which creates respect as the outcome.

Helping the spirit feel safe – If people are trustworthy and show courage to address problems, doing what they say they will do, the spirit feels safe.

Helping people feel safe culturally – be sincerely interested in others, and ask people about their expectations about how things should be done at work.

Part D – Incidents and solutions
Look for the principles involved in an incident to get to a solution. What principle would help elevate thought and behaviour? 

Incident: An employee is resisting working with a boss. 
Maybe they don’t have experience or training. Maybe they feel incompetent to do the task and don’t feel safe saying so. Maybe they feel they don’t matter. No one wants to be invisible, it is a denial of our humanity. Maybe they don’t know how to interact with a person in authority. Or they had bad experiences with a boss when they spoke up in the past. Experience with too many changes with ‘flavour of the month’ decisions, so employees have become cynical. People are unhappy with their job. They act badly or their performance drops. There is a personality disorder or an addiction issueTakeaways:
People resist because they don’t feel safeWe all have a nervous system which perceives threat via they amygdala You can calm this reaction by naming an emotion, measuring the intensity, slowing breathing, movingBuild a matrix of workplace safety that helps the mind, heart, body, spirit and culture to feel safeIf you still have resistance consider training, acknowledgement, how to interact with a boss, job unhappiness, personality/addiction issues. Support the Show.