18 episodes

I am Umy, a meta-artist, a linguist, a human. I create, I enjoy, I live. Therefore, I exist.

I am a synesthete, an empath, a highly-sensitive.
I talk about sex, lust, and human.

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Sexy Umy Umy Chang

    • Arts

I am Umy, a meta-artist, a linguist, a human. I create, I enjoy, I live. Therefore, I exist.

I am a synesthete, an empath, a highly-sensitive.
I talk about sex, lust, and human.

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    EP.15 I found U

    EP.15 I found U

    EP.15 I found U
    Where are U?

    Listen first: https://open.firstory.me/story/cktrm1t5ws5ay09276gg24fy5/platforms

    I feel so dark. 
    I cannot see anything, nothing, nothing at all. I feel lonely, I feel sad, I
    feel terrible, I am blind, I am helpless, I’m tired, and I can not sleep.

    Then I I hear the beat.
    A lot of beats, very hard! Very loud! Very strong! Very powerful!

    They punch me instantly. Every night, like a heart attack!

    I ignored it, every time. I don’t want to hear it. It scares me. It makes me
    afraid. It gives me terror.

    What are they?

    OK, stop.
    I listen to them.
    Pon-pon, Pon-pon, Pon-pon 

    My heartbeats. They are just my heart beats. 
    They beat me, they touch me, they remind me: hey U? me? Umy!

    It’s Ur own living.
    It’s Ur all beats.
    It’s U.
    It’s me.
    U make beats 
    U make a box of beats 

    U are a beatbox.

    #umy #umychang #sexy_umy #metaartist #sexeducation #heartbeat #secure #safe
    #self #terror #afraid #scare #unsure #uncertain

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    • 5 min
    SP.3 I shake U

    SP.3 I shake U

    I shake U

    I am human. I only have sexual interests in humans.

    I talk about the three attitudes in life. The three attitudes I talk about are attitudes towards money, relationship, and value. I talk about the foundation of these three attitudes. That is, my „limits“ for money, relationship, and value.

    The attitude to money, for me, is the concept of „Exchange". The limit for this concept is my ability. What kind of ability? The ability that I can use in exchange for survival in life. That is, what I am made of.

    What abilities do I have? (What can I do?)
    Which ability is most comfortable for me to show? (What do I want to do?)
    So, I show my ability comfortably.

    The attitude to relationship, for me, is the concept of „Communication". What is the limit for interpersonal relationships? It is the most basic way that I express myself. That is, how I share things.

    How would I express things? I use mouth, show facial expressions, and type words.
    Which expression do I feel the most comfortable with? I speak out.
    So, I speak out my thoughts comfortably.

    Values? I mean „Life". What is the meaning of me as a human? Why do I want to live in this world? What is the most basic reason for living? Enjoy, and have fun. Therefore, I find happiness in myself.

    Okay. For finding a partner in life, how do I find a person who matches these three attitudes? No, that's not what I mean. When it comes to finding a partner, of course, the limit for the concepts of exchange, communication, and life will be considered. But not the actual things I look for. What I seek is so much simpler…
     
    When these limits for money, relationship, and value of life is challenged, what is my attitude? Will I be angry? Will I be sad? Will I give up? Will I turn to face it? Will I know how to face it?

    Is my attitude the same as U? 
    Hmmm, that is what I have to find out.

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    • 6 min
    SP.2 I mock U

    SP.2 I mock U

    SP.2 I mock U

    I am a cognitive linguist.
    I teach. I teach linguistics. I teach cognitive linguistics.
    The name of my class is Olympiad in Linguistics.
    My students are middle school students, who are in their awkward stage of growth.

    But then, I am not a teacher. Definitely not.
    I just lead them in the name of "teacher“, 
    and make them think about WHY.

    I told jokes in class today.
    I asked them, "why do you want to tell jokes?“

    I tell jokes, I tell plain jokes, linguistically speaking, I play homophonic, I switch words, I wrote different phrases in the same pattern, I follow the similar sayings but change the meanings, I create stories with similes and metaphors.

    Sometimes, it looks simple, I just manipulate contrast and opposite, a kind of "lying“, to turn the meaning over! How interesting! Sometimes it's not fun at all, it's super shallow.

    Yes, I'm telling a lame joke. There is not much to read, just the surface.
    Where is the essence, it depends, it depends on how deep you can discover.

    I talk about jokes, I talk about sex and porn jokes. According to cognitive science, maybe? I play myself a lot. I overturned my self-understanding, directly turn to my original needs and desires, and showed them in languages.

    Every time, I will be scared! What's wrong with me? Am I alright? Did I get trauma syndrome, mental disorders, neurosis... I want to present it, so I talked about it all. I want to make it clear that, why I, as a human being, may become like this someday? Under what situations, under how much pressure, under whose control?

    I watch jokes, I watch mocks and ridicules. What kind of joke is this? You make me a joke, I feel embarrassed, the audience finds it so funny. I don’t understand this. Most of the time, I am alone. No one really mocks me.

    But I know the reverse version, I know it quite well. I find it both funny and embarrassing for the audience. What kind of joke? The same content, I make myself a joke. Okay, is this „self-deprecating"? Actually, I enjoy it. Not clear? Give it a try. And …what’s more? It won’t really hurt. I feel comfortable. Because I finally know that "Hey, this is the feeling that a human ‚may’ think about when seeing me!“

    What about me? Do I think so?
    What do I think about myself?

    The children in class today let me realize an obvious aspect of „why we mock?“ The reason for telling these jokes, is very clear: Compare. Who is prettier than me? Who is taller than me? Who is worse? Who does it better? Who is always better? Who always writes exams faster? Who always answers correctly? Who always chats with the teacher? And, I mock them.

    How do I know if my children have accidentally been “comparing“ or “compared"?

    Who do I mention most often, my child’s best friend, the first place in the class? What do I talk to them most often, looks, grades, performance? 

    When I was in middle school, in my child’s age, what did I care about the most...or…what have I been mocked before? It is, the things that happened to me which I got strong feelings towards, which I can never forget, 

    My stories.

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    • 8 min
    EP.14 I tear U

    EP.14 I tear U

    EP.14 I tear U 
    Mind the gap!

    Listen now: https://open.firstory.me/story/cktrlvkn0uk1z0a05pghiodkf/platforms

    I’ll hit U.
    I’ll kick U.
    I’ll tear U.
    I won’t let U go.

    “Don’t Go!”
    “Ga-Ji-Ma!”
    “Ma-De!”
    “Never leave me…”

    Hey! Here (wave)
    U are always wondering, don’t U realize? I never leave, I never harm, I never
    change.

    Well, tear up, U don't need to hide.
    Tissue? 

    #umy #umychang #metaartist #linguist #tissue #tear #from_tear_to_tears #gajima
    #i_let_u_go

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    • 3 min
    EP.13 I hear U

    EP.13 I hear U

    EP.13 I hear U
    Listen!

    Here, listen: https://open.firstory.me/story/cktrlpombs2og0927bnruujt6/platforms

    I peer through windows,
    Listen to neighbor’s talks.
    Replay their chatting, 
    and wonder “why?”

    Why?
    Why can I sense their pressure? And I feel depressed? They’re not my emotions
    indeed, but are with me. I am so true, so true to realize my feeling. That’s why
    I am easily covered by others’ sensation. 

    Oh, but if…
    Someone like U, heard someone like me, know someone like me, and adore someone
    like me. And suddenly, everything will never be the same.

    Our thoughts can fly. Our wings will set free, and we will remember who we
    really are. Our names, our appearances, our trusts in….ourselves.

    If someone like U,
    Found me.

    #umy #umychang #metaartist #linguist #someonelikeu #wings #fly #depression
    #depressed #loser #sad #nervous #pressure #selftrust

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    • 4 min
    SP.1 I call U

    SP.1 I call U

    SP.1 I call U
    I speak the Czech language.

    Strach
    by Martina Trchova

    [Fear]

    Největší vrah je tvůj vlastní strach
    Zabije i to, co je nadosah
    Uhasí dekou i stodolu v plameni
    A ty si kryješ oči, abys nedostala znamení
    A bílá vlajka trčí ze tvýho těla
    Ne, co jsi to chtěla
    Vždyť někde uvnitř v koutě
    Kam nepozvou tě
    Duše se krčí celá rozechvělá

    (Google Translate)
    [The biggest killer is your own fear
    It also kills what is within reach
    He puts out the blanket and the barn in the flame
    And you cover your eyes so you don't get a sign
    And a white flag sticking out of your body
    Not what you wanted
    After all, somewhere inside in the corner
    Where they won't invite you
    The soul crouches, trembling]

    Největší had je tvůj vlastní hlad
    Plíží se tiše ve tvým nafouklým břiše
    A dokud budeš tvrdit, že máš dost
    I voda z kohoutku způsobí ti opilost
    Poslouchej, volá ti Láma
    Pravda je v tobě a ne za horama
    A tak jak tečou řeky do údolí
    Přehrada je jen, co si nedovolíš

    (Google Translate)
    [The biggest snake is your own hunger
    It creeps softly into your puffy belly
    And as long as you say you've had enough
    Even tap water will make you drunk
    Listen, the Lama is calling you
    The truth is in you, not in the mountains
    And as the rivers flow into the valley
    The dam is just what you can't afford]

    Láska
    A to je láska

    (Google Translate)
    Love
    And that's love.

    ———
    Why Love?
    I don’t know, either.

    Umy thinks, I think.

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    • 7 min

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