Why Struggle? Podcast w Barbara J. Faison Barbara J. Faison

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2024 - Week 26 - 2024 Mid-year Review

You can listen to this on my podcast - 8:40 mins or click the link here for the YouTube Channel version (audio only

This episode is about checking in with 2024.

We are halfway through 2024 so this week I decided to look back at some of the accomplishments and experiences I've had so far. I started doing this around 2018 after TD, my husband and I were having a conversation about the last time we had gone to visit his family in Tennessee…we couldn't remember when it was. After that I started writing down a year in review so that wouldn’t happen again. Lol

I had already been keeping a daily quick log of things I wanted to remember in mini journals, I would buy in 3 packs that would often have quotes on them like fascinating thoughts.

Most days of the week I do a quick note with the date and what I wanted to remember.

My journal from 2017 had a note on 9/23/17 that while we were on vacation in Panama City, Fl, a woman on the beach gave us 4 chairs and an umbrella because they were heading home and didn’t want to take them. A lovely reminder of the kindness of strangers.

A few examples of notes from my daily journal this year.

4.16.24 - no sweets or coffee

5.2.24 - student Mani Pedi at Beauty 21

5.7.24 - my friend Ade was in town for her birthday so we enjoyed Indian food for dinner

5.16.24 - A lady bug on my windshield. This is important because I used to call my mom ladybug and whenever a ladybug is nearby, it makes me feel that she is somewhere close watching over me.

Those are things I want to remember.

I think it was around 2018 I started doing the Review/Reflections for the year. It was a great way to recap what stood out that I wanted to remember. Using columns in Word or a OneNote document I added a header called 20__ Review. There are 12 columns with heading for each month and bullet points under each heading. Each month I write down something I want to remember about the month. Sometimes it's two things, sometimes it's 10 things. Sometimes it's an accomplishment and sometimes it's an experience.

My review goes like this, written in bullet form:

January


Started a weekly newsletter that also serves as my podcast


Birthday weekend with TD - dinner at Pier 42, American Fiction movie



March


Recorded 14 Audio Description voiceovers for Accessible Chicago series


Lunch with Susan



April


Tybee Island Beach for the first time


Day trip to meet with Regenna in Charlotte, NC



The Year in Review is a way of logging and tracking important moments in my life. I can print this out and keep them in order and capture the year. I couldn’t but so far, the reviews are just online. lol

Looking at my year in review, reminds me of where I've focused Money. Energy. Effort. Time.

The only way I can do my year in review is by referencing my mini journal with my daily activities. Ok, so you may be thinking, why don’t you use a day timer/planner? I tried to do that and I found that I ended up having a bunch of planner that took up space and I would have to go back and find the dates I wanted to remember. And that's where my small journals that are about 4" x 6" come in handy. I may not write in it every day although I do write in it several times a week to remind me of what has happened.

Daily there are opportunities to remind me where I want to M.E.E.T. life. When I make decisions I ask myself… what am I willing to commit - M.E.E.T. -Money. Energy. Effort. Time.

I log my daily or weekly important activities I want to remember in my mini journal that feeds into my Year In Review highlights sheet. Most days I also do a quick daily journal where I connect with how I feel about things and can go into more detail. 


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2024 - Week 25 - What I Believe (Replay)

NOTE: IF YOU NOTICED THE BLOOPER, EMAIL ME WITH WHAT I DID AND I'll send you a CARD DECK FOR YOU OR AS A GIFT. (FOR THE 1st three people)

This episode is a replay of Week 51 from 2023, What I BelieveAround this time I start to review my year and check in with what is important to me.

I’m thinking about how I have been spending my time and how I want to spend my time in the future.

Asking questions helps me stay focused. Am I sharing my T.A.G.S. - Talents, Abilities, Gifts, Skills, to the best of my abilities? An important question is - have my beliefs and philosophies changed?

The excerpt that I’m sharing this week from my book/ebook/audiobook, Why Struggle? Life is too short to wear tight shoes, is part of the about this book section. In this part of the book I share my life philosophies.

I hope you enjoy it!

About this Book

It’s been about 23 years since Why Struggle? The book was published.

The initial book was a very important part of my personal and spiritual growth, just as this new endeavor for the e-book and audio book continues to allow me to Learn, Evolve, and Grow (LEG). My personal beliefs and life philosophies are the same, and I’ve added a few more since I’ve lived a lot more life.

My beliefs and life philosophies are:

• Be Loving. Love is the most powerful, healing, transformative power.  Being loving is the answer to most situations.

• Be Truthful. I must find my personal truth and what brings me joyand peace.

• Move forward. Everything happens for a reason. Many times I willnever know why specific things happen, I must move forwardanyway.

• Be Forgiving. Learn to forgive myself and others, quickly. There areno mistakes – only learning experiences.

• Be Open. I am a student and teacher in the school of life. Teachersare everywhere, and I must be an open and willing student at alltimes. Usually, when I am the “teacher” I learn way more than Icould ever teach.

• Order is a natural law. Everything happens in divine order.

• Be Calm. Calm and chaos are both mental choices, I can choose  differently at any time.

• Be Easy. Life is about timing and FLOW  (Feeling Loving Open Willing). I am learning to get out of the way    more.

• Be One. We are all interconnected because we are one.

• LEG. My main purpose is to Learn, Evolve, and Grow (LEG) as much  as I can. Everything else will fall into place.

• Be Still. Time in silence and having spiritual practices such as  meditation, radical forgiveness, journaling and tapping (Emotional  Freedom Technique) are essential for my overall well-being.

• Trust my PGS. My Personal Guidance System (PGS) will lead, guide   and direct me when I relax and get still enough to hear its   directions.

Who knew in 1999 I would be teaching meditation classes and be that lady that might say to you...“I have a message for you.” There is no way on earth I would have had that insight back then. It all started with questions and wanting answers. It all started with wanting to live a better life. It all started with simply not wanting to struggle. Struggling is a choice. Life is what you decide it will be regardless of the emotions you experience. I have learned that taking time to be still helps me get clear and make better choices.

I’ve learned to ask important questions to help me continue to move forward in life. How do I feel right now? Am I struggling right now, if so why? If I am struggling, I remember that struggling is a choice and I ask myself if I really want to take that emotional rollercoaster ride that might be the next step. I’ve learned to BREATHE deeply and often in order to come back to right now. What can I do right now to feel better? Breathe. Maybe listening to a song or playlist or taking a walk can help me have a different feeling. Do I really need to call someone or can I figure things o

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2024 - Week 24 - Feeling Joy!



CHECK OUT THE NATIONAL MEDITATION PLAYLIST ON YOUTUBE

2024 - Week 24 - Be Joyful

This is a podcast about FEELING JOY!

 Joy - a few definitions include: a source or cause of delight and a feeling of great pleasure and happiness. When was the last time you experienced joy?



I recently thought about what brings me joy now at this age and stage in my life. Sometimes it is as simple as sitting in a park near a lake. Or going to my monthly crochet group learning a new stitch. Enjoying a belly laugh with a dear friend while having a regular conversation on the phone. Sometimes joy is going out dancing with my salsa dancing crew, I always have a great time with them! 

On Saturday evening I went to a surprise birthday party for Anana Harris Parris. I met Anana over 25 years ago while out salsa dancing. An author and the founder of the Self Care Agency and Sister Care Alliance organizations, her focus is self-care as a form of social justice and social justice as a form of self-care. She conducts workshops and programs and she is constantly helping others. I call her Amazing, Awesome Anana! 

When I got the invite for the surprise party I was curious how they could pull off a surprise for this dynamo who had already had  a 5k walk planned and was teaching a dance class earlier in the day. Here's what they did. Two of her friends were in town and they told her they had dinner reservations but wanted to see her new office space before they went. It was a perfect way to get her to the party!

When Anana walked off the elevator into the office lobby, she saw a host of family and friends greeting her for the surprise. Mission accomplished! The joy on Anana’s face was priceless!



We went up to the office and Anana was greeted with African drumming and we continues the celebration with a combination of salsa music, house music and more. Anana has joyful laugh and energy and when she starts to dance, that energy radiates to anyone around. I not only felt joy for myself, I felt joy watching everyone else enjoy themselves. We had great food, fun and fellowship. I am grateful I really took the time to cherish the experience.

Joy can be experienced whenever and wherever. I don't know about you, but as I continue to get older the little times of joy are even more important. We are always creating memories, I want to create more joy filled memories.  The present moment creates our future history, it's essential to be FULLY present and to savor these moments.

Listening to my salsa playlist brings me joy. Hanging out with my crochet group brings me joy. Laughing and enjoying time with my friends brings me joy. Taking a day trip or watching a movie with my husband brings me joy.



What's bringing you joy right now? Leave a comment where you are listening to this podcast.

You can also email me at barbarafaisonllc@gmail.com. And if social media is better for you, LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram, are best.There are two opportunities to join me for my Breathe with Barbara Live sessions this month. Tonight and next Wednesday from 8 - 9 pm ET. If you would like to join you can register on my website at barbarafaison.com/store/livemeditations.



If you want to join the Breathe with Barbara LIVE session for tonight we start at 8 pm eastern. You can register on my website at barbarafaison.com/store/ live meditation, you can also use MONEY for 10% off your order as a promo code.
all the links: LINKTR.EE/BARBARAFAISON






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This is a podcast about knowing yourself and having sustainable practices.

Developing and sustaining a daily meditation practice for over 25 years helped me gain a deeper level of self-awareness. I have learned that the more I practice the more I gain a level of self-mastery with what I am practicing. Being self-aware and having personal insight allows me to recognize when I need to focus on a specific tool or technique, MORE.

I remember when I was at dinner with a few former colleagues in 2017 and an active shooter entered the restaurant. We were ending dinner when we heard the words, “Everybody down.” I was with three much younger ladies reminding them to breathe and affirming that we would be okay.

Was I concerned as we were underneath the table waiting for more news? Of course. I also had a strong sense that we would all be fine.

As the scene dispersed and the police arrived we found out that the person who instructed us to get down was a retired police officer. Time passed and the shooter was apprehended and we all left to return safely to our homes. 

One of the definitions of trauma is a “deeply disturbing or distressing experience.” Yep, I would say it was a traumatic experience. When I arrived home I checked in with TD and I immediately went to my living room and lay flat on my back on the floor. I found a sound vibration recording on YouTube that focused on healing, safety and feeling grounded. I listened to the recording and felt my body begin to release some of that energy and relax.

The next day as I told my brother about what happened he reminded me to rest. After our conversation I felt my body physically releasing some of the stress and I had a very long nap. I also felt achy later that day. I knew I needed help processing what happened so I called the Employee Assistance Program and I was able to schedule counseling.  I also called the ladies to suggest they reach out for support via their Employee Assistance Program as well.

This quote from Bessel A. van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, reminds me to be truthful with myself.

“The greatest sources of our suffering are the lies we tell ourselves.”

My nervous system was impacted by that experience. I learned a lot in


the therapy sessions about processing trauma and how the book title states, “the body keeps score.” We feel trauma in our bodies and it helps to have ways to release what the body is holding on to. 



I have different practices I use to keep grounded, stay centered and to release energy that is stuck in my body. Practice is the opportunity to fine tune our skills so when we are called to use them, we can use them effectively. Here are a few practices I do regularly to reduce stress on my nervous system.


Emotional freedom technique (EFT) also known as tapping- specifically for trauma or an experience. I found Regulate Your Nervous System After Trauma by Julie Schiffman. Here is a link.


Schedule a counseling session,


Sound vibration meditations to shift the energy in my body - Jhene Aiko’s Trigger Protection Mantra is a staple for me to have playing in the background. It’s very soothing and she has several available for different lengths.



Life has unexpected detours ALL the time. In addition to breathing practices, meditation, laughter, and approaching experiences with  curiosity helps me practice less judgment of myself and others.

What are some of the ways you navigate life’s unpredictable journey? Leave a comment wherever you are listening to this podcast.

You can also email me at barbarafaisonllc@gmail.com. And if social media is better for you, LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram, are best.


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2024 - Week 22 - Pat Yourself on the Back

You can listen to this on my podcast - 8:36 mins or click the link above for the YouTube Channel version (audio only)

This is a podcast about trusting yourself and patting yourself on the back.

How are you doing? I’m feeling really proud of myself right now. Over the long weekend my husband and I did a lot of work around the house.  We both worked diligently on our projects around the house. Mine included cleaning out the refrigerator, cleaning out and organizing the pots and pans, organizing our sunroom, which had become very cluttered. And also our guest room. Well, let’s just say no one could sleep in there. Lol.

It was a very active weekend filled with lots of bags being thrown out and things being donated. Monday evening around 7:30 pm I went to sit out in the retreat space in the back of my yard, and before I could sit for five minutes, mosquitoes reminded me that it was too late to be out there. I went back to the house and was really ready to begin my evening wind down for the night. We made a lot of progress. I thought about my mom and how she would say, “Baby, remember to pat yourself on the back.”

The next thing I know, TD suggested that we move a few more things from one room to the next. Now? I thought to myself. We had been going nonstop all weekend. I’m thinking to myself, and I have been cooking. So in addition to all the cleaning and organizing, I’m cooking food. I went along with it.

At 9:00 PM, TD decides he wants to shampoo the carpet. I looked at him and said you know it’s 9:00 PM, right? And you know we both have to work tomorrow and we have been going nonstop for three days. He said yes, he knew all of those things and he proceeded to spray spot carpet cleaner in certain areas. Usually I would be more helpful and pick up items that could be picked up so he could shampoo the carpet more thoroughly. I picked up a few things that I could off the floor. My body was tired. My legs hurt, my feet hurt and I was emotionally spent.

My body was done. I took a shower. I got in the bed. I wrote a few items in my journal since I was on day 42 of journaling and I wanted to keep that commitment to myself and then I went to bed.

This reminded me of one of my book excerpts, “You Can’t Make Anyone _____. ”

“You Can’t Make Anyone ”

Wouldn’t it be nice to have people do what we want them to do all day long? Good luck with that. We live in a society of free will. Every day we make choices. Each person takes a path that will be filled with learning experiences for that individual.

You can’t make anyone do anything they don’t want to do. The only behavior you can control is your own. A reminder of this is watching a two-year-old or any child have a tantrum. The child will stop when ready, no matter what anyone tries to say or do to him/her. We can’t control anyone as much as we may think we can. Learn to accept people for who they are, not who you want them to be. Learn to manage your ability to respond to others and check in with yourself. Learn to step back and check your expectations.

Practice: Before you ask anyone to change his/her behavior, think about your expectations. Is the change for your benefit because it would make you more comfortable? How would you feel if someone wanted you to change your behavior?

Affirmation: I accept people for who they are in my life.

End of excerpt.

Did TD shampoo the carpet? Of course he did. Lol. TD leaves for work about 5:15 am, so I’m not usually fully awake.  Did I rest well? I sure did. After I woke up I sent this text:

Hey baby, the carpet looks great. I was just exhausted. My legs and my entire body was aching. Sorry I couldn’t be of more assistance.

 Keep listening.


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2024 - Week 21 - Stay Grounded

You can listen to this on my podcast - 9:39 mins or click the link above for the YouTube Channel version (audio only)

CHECK OUT THE NATIONAL MEDITATION PLAYLIST ON YOUTUBE

This podcast is about staying grounded.

This past weekend my husband, TD, and I went out to San Antonio, Texas to visit with his sister and her husband. Whenever I travel, I like extra time to recuperate from the travel. What that means for me is giving myself permission to rest a little bit more in the morning instead of jumping up out of bed and starting my day. After sitting on the flight for over an hour due to mechanical difficulties, Delta has us change planes.  The flight to San Antonio had so much turbulence due to the storms in Houston that the flight crew was unable to leave their seats.  Nothing like a flight with constant turbulence to remind you of what's important in life. I took a lot of deep breaths while watching The Beekeeper on the plane.  A great way to practice! I am grateful we made it safely to our destination.Enjoy Day 22 from the National Meditation Playlist on my YouTube channel,  it is a grounding meditation and it feels like a just right meditation based upon my experience with the flight. By the way, the return flight was perfect, no turbulence at all. Give thanks for all things.

https://youtu.be/-gFS-4fwNbU










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