Dating Over Fifty - The Pleasures and the Perils‪!‬ Lynn Garson

In my other life, the one in which I am NOT thinking about dating, I practice “big law.” This gives me a platform from which to advocate for mental health, the topic of my first book, Southern Vapors. What better time to put a message out there about what it’s like to struggle during uncertain times and some personal thoughts on taking care of ourselves. Be well.

Welcome to Episode Eight of “Dating Over 50: The Pleasure and the Perils!” Who is the person you are always with? More than anybody else in the entire world? Yourself, of course. And “emo” [1] as it may sound, you’ve got to love yourself before you can connect to anybody else in an adult, mature relationship. At least that’s my experience and the advice of the legion [2] of therapists that I have seen in my 65 years. For me, it’s a work in progress (isn’t everything?) which I’ll share with you in this episode.


[1] My kids are forever calling me out for being “emo,” so I may as well put it to good use. The translation of “emo,” if your children are not as obliging as mine, is “ excessively emotional.” 

[2] I could have as easily said “army” or ‘battalion,” but I didn’t want to overwhelm you. 

"You can argue with reality and you will lose, but only 100% of the time." Wise words, words that helped me overcome my penchant for making up fantasies about the men I dated until unavoidable reality hit me in the face, usually to my great disappointment. If you have ever done the same, listen in and send your thoughts to me at https://www.facebook.com/lynngarsonauthor.

Episode Six is about the second pattern that I’ve identified in the relationships described in Sex and the Single Grandma. This one is about not speaking up for myself, a long held tradition for anyone who is raised in the South. Have I learned anything? Listen and find out.

In Episode Five, I FINALLY get to the series of dates described in my book, Sex and the Single Grandma. I know you’ve been impatiently waiting for that. You’ll hear me identify four different patterns that became apparent through my dating journey and I’ll give you a more in-depth look at the first pattern, neediness and rushing it. The other three patterns will be the subject of later episodes. The payoff -- what I learned about myself once I figured out that I kept doing the same thing over and over – was a pleasant surprise.

In Episode Four, you will hear from a fascinating guest, Rickey Marks – lawyer, author, musician, singer and actress – about her thoughts on the unpleasant yet widespread maxim that “women over fifty are invisible.”  Take a wild guess on her (and my) reactions to that concept. They range from “phooey” to somewhat ruder and cruder expressions. What’s interesting, though, is the different paths Rickey and I have chosen to make ourselves visible. Neither of us is Cher or Jane Fonda – ya think? – but we’ve still found ways that were authentic for each of us. How about you?