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What ‘Rules’ are holding you back?
What rules do you have for yourself that are holding you back?
At this time of year it’s really easy to get sucked into doing things you ‘should’ be doing (think resolutions, all the goals, stop drinking, eat healthy etc) or ‘shouldn’t’ be just because the date has changed.
So with this episode I just want to help you to become more aware of these rules.
What if this year we focus less on the ‘have tos’ and focus more on how and who we want to be.
The rule book has changed.
2020 was a shocker for many. 2021 we’re still in the same place right now.
So why would we add extra pressure in a time where even the most resilient of us are starting to buckle?
Live this year with consciousness.
What do you want to feel?
Rules are the things we blindly follow in life because there will be consequences if we don’t. So there’s the usual life rules, often with legalities attached that make sense or come from authority! Those aren’t the rules I'm talking about here.
I’m talking about the internal ‘rules’ that we take on from parents, friends, society, our experiences when we’re young and the ones we just create for ourselves in our own noggins!
The things where we make up stories.
‘If I do this then that happens’. Or ‘If I don’t do this then that happens, or won’t happen’.
A pretty common one as an example, is this idea that you have to hustle and work hard to be successful.
But the thing is, there are so many nuances just to that statement alone!
What even is hustling? How hard? What even is success? What measures either?
They are unconscious (usually unreasonably high!) standards that we set for ourselves. And often, other people.
I do really have to watch myself with this and be super conscious because I like rules. I like order. I like control and setting rules for ourselves is a way that we can achieve that.
It’s something that creates a sense of safety for me.
My Dad was a teacher and housemaster and my Mum worked in schools too so rules were part of my make up.
Rules can be a good thing IF we allow ourselves to challenge them and be curious about whether they are true and whether they work for us or not.
For example one of my rules now is I don’t have to do things like everyone else to be successful.
So you can see how that could be a good rule to have.
It gives me a lot of freedom.
It allows me to act with curiosity and find the best route forward for me, in line with my values.
It allows me to be on clubhouse and not get sucked in or worry about being left behind.
It’s still a framework that I have for myself, but MUCH more helpful than.
‘I have to do X, Y and Z in my business’ because some guru told me it worked for them and was the ONLY way to run a business.
But, without t