Been There Got Out Podcast Chris & Lisa

Navigating the tangled web of divorce law requires more than just a sharp legal mind; it demands a heart attuned to the emotional whirlwinds faced by those in the throes of marital dissolution. In our latest episode, we're joined by New York matrimonial attorney Ian Steinberg, who shares his insightful journey from real estate to family law, highlighting the profound ways empathy and communication shape his practice. With a candid discussion about the strategic and emotional facets of divorce settlements, Ian offers a blend of wisdom and reassurance, drawing from his unique experience as a hockey referee to tackle the intricacies of legal disputes.

Divorce isn't just a legal battle; it's an emotional odyssey that necessitates a comprehensive support system. Ian emphasizes the critical importance of assembling a team that includes not only legal but financial and emotional advisors. Whether it's the initial guilt some clients feel or the anger that may bubble up as cases drag on, he provides practical advice on managing these feelings and making informed decisions. And for those daunted by the task of narrating the story of their relationship to a legal audience, Ian breaks down where to start and the elements to focus on for a compelling and clear presentation.

As we peer into the future of divorce law, we recognize the evolving nature of the courtroom, now extending into the virtual space, and the need for maintaining decorum within this novel setting. Steinberg shares his '24-hour rule,' a vital strategy for keeping emotions in check when crafting communications that could sway the outcome of a case. Together, we explore how this rule, alongside the principle of imagining a judge as the ultimate reader of all correspondence, can steer both lawyers and clients towards more mindful interactions within the often heated arena of family law. Join us for an episode that masterfully balances the art of legal strategy with the human touch essential in guiding clients through one of life's most challenging passages.

Facing the stormy seas of legal disputes can be a daunting voyage, especially when domestic abuse and financial strains are at the helm. Brittany Blaney of Elm Law and Divorce Buddy joins us to navigate through these turbulent waters, offering her seasoned perspectives on legal abuse in the family law realm. Our conversation charts a course through the complexities of combatting such abuse within the judicial system, where Brittany's expertise shines a light on the importance of community, storytelling, and strategic financial planning to ease the burden of lengthy legal battles.

As we traverse the delicate territory of trauma-informed legal practice, we explore the critical balance lawyers must maintain when advising clients who carry the weight of complex PTSD. We discuss the therapeutic power of journaling for those entangled in the legal process, and how attorneys can establish boundaries while compassionately guiding clients through the recounting of their experiences. These narratives not only serve the legal strategy but also offer clients a measure of solace and clarity – a dual benefit not to be overlooked in the quest for justice.

In the final leg of our journey, we cast a light on the innovative Divorce Buddy service, designed to support individuals representing themselves amidst the legal fray. Brittany steers us through the common hazards self-represented litigants face, the significance of procedural savvy, and why responding to vexatious litigation with measured tactics can prevent the court system from becoming a weapon against the vulnerable. Concluding our insightful exchange, Brittany shares how to tap into the wealth of guidance she offers both in and out of the courtroom, ensuring our listeners have a compass to find their way through any legal storm.

Navigating the labyrinth of family court is daunting enough, but when you're contending with a disability, the stakes and stress can multiply. That's where Donna Drumm steps in – a New York attorney and certified advocate for Americans with Disabilities who joins us to shed light on the less-discussed accommodations in family court. Donna's expertise offers a lifeline to those feeling overwhelmed, providing key insights into the wide-ranging definition of disabilities and the intricacies of requesting necessary court accommodations without compromising one's privacy or case.
This episode goes beyond the courtroom, delving into the personal battles many face with invisible disabilities such as PTSD and depression. We unpack the subtleties of how these conditions can affect decision-making and communication, crucial components in legal battles, and the importance of acknowledging changes in behavior. Donna emphasizes the value of clear communication with your attorney and demystifies the often misunderstood relationship between intellectual ability and executive functioning. With Donna's compassionate guidance, listeners are equipped not just with knowledge, but with a powerful sense of understanding and advocacy in navigating the legal system with a disability.

Unlock the secrets to successfully selling your home during the emotional maelstrom of a divorce with help from Jen Purzycki of Purzycki. As a certified real estate divorce specialist, Jen brings a compassionate yet strategic approach to navigating the choppy waters of property sales amidst separation. Together, we explore the nooks and crannies of splitting assets and addressing the unique challenges of high-conflict resolution, offering practical advice for those facing the daunting task of managing such delicate transitions. Our conversation bridges the gap between personal recovery from coercive control and professional guidance, providing solace and solutions to listeners in similar straits.

The episode moves beyond simple logistics, stressing the importance of preparing your home for the market while deeply entangled in the complexities of a divorce. From untangling equity and sorting through capital gains tax exemptions to the crucial role that divorce coaches and forensic CPAs play, we cover it all. The financial implications are vast, and the emotional toll on the parties, especially children, cannot be understated. This episode isn't just a how-to on real estate; it's a beacon of hope and a guide for finding solid footing when life seems to be shifting beneath your feet. Join us on this journey as we lay out a roadmap for those looking to sell their shared home and turn over a new leaf.

Navigating the turbulent waters of co-parenting after a high-conflict divorce can be an emotional rollercoaster for everyone involved. We're fortunate to have Asia Scarlett-Jones, a seasoned family law attorney from New York City, join us to explore the complexities and emotional impact of custody disputes. Her insights are poignant, highlighting the importance of prioritizing children's welfare above all and addressing the sensitive implications of domestic violence allegations on custody arrangements. As we wade through the day-to-day struggles of the residential parent, Asia's expertise shines a light on the often-invisible challenges, from homework supervision to medical appointments, and the delicate balance these parents must strike.

Our in-depth discussion also delves into the nuances of reintegrating absent parents into their children's lives, a process often fraught with tension. Asia guides us through the court's approach to this delicate situation, advocating for gradual steps tailored to the child's emotional needs. The "fun parent" dynamic surfaces, and we dissect the implications for both the non-residential parent's sporadic involvement and the residential parent's consistent, routine care. Moreover, Asia underscores the pitfalls of poor communication, particularly in our digital era, and the necessity of presenting a positive and respectful online presence during legal family disputes.

By the end of our conversation, it's clear that the path to harmonious co-parenting is one that requires self-awareness, personal growth, and a thorough understanding of legal intricacies. Asia emphasizes the need to separate one's role as a former partner from their ongoing role as a parent and addresses common missteps that can hinder effective co-parenting. She also introduces the transformative potential of subscription-based legal services, a boon for families seeking accessible, ongoing legal support. This episode promises to be an enlightening resource for anyone facing the intricate dance of co-parenting and custody challenges.

Join us for a captivating discussion with the wonderful Chelsey Brooke Cole, a narcissistic abuse recovery therapist and author, as we eagerly await the launch of her insightful book, "If I'd Only Known." In our conversation, we navigate the complexities of narcissism and the journey towards healing from relational trauma. Chelsey expertly dissects her book's three-part structure: unraveling the intricacies of narcissism, guiding us through the healing of trauma and the trauma bond, and offering strategies for post-traumatic growth. Moreover, we shed light on the insidious nature of religious abuse, a topic that Chelsey emphasizes is on the rise and causing hidden distress for many.

Listen in as we explore the unsettling prevalence of narcissism within religious communities, sparking a thought-provoking examination of whether these spiritual environments are more susceptible to narcissistic personalities. Our dialogue touches on how narcissists may misuse religious platforms to gain power and evade accountability, exploiting values like forgiveness. By identifying these behaviors, we aim to foster safer religious spaces, emphasizing that awareness is key to maintaining one's faith while being vigilant of manipulation.

The conversation then delves into the manipulation tactics narcissists use in church communities, exploiting the inherent trust of the congregation. We discuss the concept of spiritual abuse, stressing the importance of trusting one's instincts against the backdrop of outward piety. The challenge of exposing wrongdoing within these tight-knit communities is not lost on us, and we highlight the additional obstacles survivors face when their experiences are met with disbelief. This enlightening episode not only informs but also serves as a beacon of support for those seeking to navigate and heal from the entanglements of narcissistic abuse within religious settings.