“Love without knowledge can harm more than it helps.” 「沒有知識的愛,有時會帶來傷害。」 Since I was little, I have always loved small animals. My home was once filled with fish, ducklings, chicks, rabbits, silkworms, and even cats. Although I was full of enthusiasm and curiosity, I often made mistakes while caring for them simply because I was too young to know better. These experiences left a deep mark on me—mixed with regret and longing—and eventually became my first lessons in learning to respect life. 從小我就非常喜歡小動物。家裡養過魚、鴨子、小雞、兔子、蠶寶寶,甚至還有貓咪。那時候的我滿懷熱情與好奇心,但因為太小、太不了解,常常在照顧牠們時犯下錯誤。這些經歷至今仍深深烙印在我的記憶裡,帶著懊悔與思念,也成為我學會尊重生命的重要一課。 I once had a white rabbit who accidentally got injured. Wanting to help, I carefully applied purple antiseptic on its wound. The medicine stained its fluffy white fur into a patch of purple, and I felt guilty and worried that I had done something wrong. That night, I let the rabbit sleep on my bed, hoping to make up for my “mistake.” 我曾經養過一隻白色的兔子。有一天牠不小心受傷了,我想幫牠治療,於是小心翼翼地在傷口上塗了紫藥水。白色的毛被染成紫色,我看著牠變色的毛,心裡既愧疚又難過,覺得自己好像做錯了什麼。那晚我把牠抱到床上陪我一起睡,想彌補我的「錯誤」。 The next morning, I woke up to find the rabbit gone. I ran to my mother and asked, “Where did the bunny go?” She quietly pointed to the cardboard box outside our door—the place where I often played with it. When I walked over, I saw it lying still inside, already gone. I burst into tears. My mother gently told me that I might have hugged it too tightly in my sleep and accidentally suffocated it. That moment was the first time I felt real heartbreak, and the first time I understood just how fragile life is. 隔天早上醒來,我發現牠不見了。我急忙跑去問媽媽:「兔兔去哪了?」媽媽沉默地指向門外我們常一起玩耍的紙箱。當我走過去,看到牠靜靜地躺在裡面,已經離開了。我哇地哭了出來。媽媽輕聲告訴我,可能是我睡覺時抱得太緊,不小心壓到牠了。那一刻,我第一次感受到真正的心痛,也第一次明白生命如此脆弱。 Another time, my silkworm eggs had just hatched, and I was overjoyed. I thought sunlight would help them grow faster, so I placed their box near the window. What I didn’t notice was the sudden change in weather. A heavy rainstorm soaked the entire box, and by the time I discovered it, it was too late. I sat by the window, staring at the drenched silkworms, blaming myself for my carelessness. 還有一次,我的蠶寶寶剛孵化,我開心得不得了,以為曬曬太陽可以讓牠們長得更快,就把小盒子放到窗邊。沒注意午後天氣驟變,一場大雨把整個盒子淋得透濕。等我發現時,一切都來不及了。我坐在窗邊,看著濕透的小生命,忍不住自責,為自己的疏忽而心痛。 I also remember finding a lonely kitten in the alley with the neighborhood kids. Worried that it might get cold, we placed it in a cardboard box lined with a warm towel and covered it with a black plastic bag to block the wind. When the temperature dropped that night, we naïvely thought lighting a small candle inside the box would keep it warm. The next day, we returned only to find a burn mark on the ground and heard the cleaner mutter, “Who was so careless and hurt this poor kitten?” My heart broke instantly. Our innocent kindness had turned into an irreversible tragedy. 還有一次,我和鄰居小孩在巷子裡發現一隻落單的小貓。擔心牠著涼,我們找了一個紙箱,鋪上毛巾,再用黑色塑膠袋蓋住想擋風。當晚氣溫驟降,我們天真地以為在箱子裡點一根蠟燭可以幫牠取暖。隔天回去時,只看到地上一大片焦黑痕跡,還聽到清潔人員說:「誰這麼不小心,把小貓害成這樣?」那一刻,我的心瞬間碎了。年幼無知的善意,竟釀成無法挽回的錯誤。 There was also a Persian cat who wandered into our house. My father encouraged me to try caring for it, even though we had no idea how to raise a cat. Without a litter box, the cat often urinated and pooped on the staircase, and its long fur would get dirty easily. I tried to help by trimming its fur—and out of curiosity, I even cut off its whiskers. I didn’t know whiskers affected a cat’s balance. It became anxious and unstable, and eventually ran away. 還有一隻波斯貓牠自己跑進我們家,爸爸鼓勵我試著照顧牠,但我們對養貓一無所知。沒有準備貓砂盆,牠常在樓梯間尿尿、便便,長長的毛也常沾到髒污。我想幫牠,就幫牠修剪毛,甚至因為好奇心作祟,還把牠的鬍鬚剪掉。我不知道鬍鬚會影響貓的平衡感。牠變得焦躁不安,最後乾脆離家出走。 One day, I saw it in the back alley. It recognized me, but immediately turned and ran away—as if escaping from me. Standing there, I felt a deep sadness and guilt. I realized that even though I loved it, I had been loving it in the wrong way. 有一天,我在家後巷看到牠。牠認出我,卻立刻拔腿就跑,好像在逃避我。我站在那裡,又難過又愧疚,明白自己雖然愛牠,卻用錯了方式。