Do you suffer from compare and despair?! You know what I mean, like when you scroll through social media and suddenly start to feel like crap because your life is not as perfect as someone else’s. Why does it seem like everyone else is always on vacation and having the best time? Maybe all you did this summer was a stay-cation which involved mostly home improvements and running errands. Productive maybe, but nothing glamorous or social media worthy. When you constantly hear and see how perfect everyone’s life seems it’s hard not to compare to how your life looks and feels.
Even though we know no one’s life is perfect, and we all have struggles, it can be difficult to avoid the comparison trap. I can go from having a wonderful day to feeling pretty s****y about myself after a few minutes of scrolling. Don't get me wrong I’m genuinely happy for people when they are celebrating life’s happy moment’s- Lord knows we all need to celebrate the wins- besides it’s not fun to share the misfortunes of life, but naturally when others share their highlight reels I can’t help but think about what I DON'T have or what I'm NOT doing.
Matter of fact, a few days ago I was reading a post from a fellow podcaster I adore who celebrated her 1 year anniversary and mentioned how she had over 40,000 downloads and I immediately started to think how low my numbers were compared to hers. I’m on my 14thepisode and close to 900 downloads— which I was super proud of, but after reading how she has over 40,000 at her year mark, I instantly felt defeated. I started to question what I was doing and thinking maybe this isn’t for me. I haven’t even been doing this a year, and there is so much I love about it and what’s come from it, but because of the negative feelings that surfaced I actually thought of giving up. Thankfully it didn’t take me long to snap out of it and get back in my own lane, but still I didn’t like the negative self-talk and feelings that surfaced. I want to share some tips I use to re-direct my thoughts and get me back on track so you too can try them when you feel these emotions coming on.
PRACTICE GRATITUDE- Start running through a list of things you are grateful for- write them down if you must- and don’t overlook anything- list it all and keep going until you start to feel better. CHANGE YOUR MINDSET- Change your mindset to a feeling of abundance versus lack. When we linger in a state of wanting and not having, we can get lost in a state of lack that never seems to subside. This is an energetically draining and can pile on a load of self-doubt and low self-esteem and prevent us from reaching our goals. On the other hand, when we look at all we DO HAVE we see all the possibliities and the confidence to get there and the more positive vibes we’ll attract. Think of what you want to attract more of and start thinking and acting in that manner. MEDITATE- Practice the Art of Being in the Present Moment. Put your phone away. Find a comfortable seated position either on the floor or in a chair. Sit up with your back straight and chin down. Close your eyes. Get quiet. Notice your body. Recognize the sounds around you. Pay attention to your breath in and out. Count up to 5 inhales then 5 exhaies. Do this for at least five minutes or until you feel like you are relaxed and present and can move on with your day in a productive way. RECOGNIZE YOUR FEELINGS- Recognizing and Identifying your feelings helps you move past them- I’ll sometimes say “Dinah it’s time to choose better thoughts.” Or say a mantra something like “I am gratful and blessed” or “I choose love for myself and others.” PRACTICE LOVE AND COMPASSION- Show some love for the situation. Try to come from a place of love. How would you respond if you were coming