In 2015, I suffered a concussion that completely changed my life. My entire career I have been someone who prides themselves on working hard. If someone tells me I’m not going to make it, I say “thank you” and add fuel to the fire.
During our offseason, we are in control of our training. For me, most days are double days, at least, and then I’d spend my free time at coffee shops writing.
But this offseason, I couldn’t even walk, ride in a car, or be around people for extended periods of time without debilitating symptoms.
Despite my symptoms, I was determined to get back in time for the start of the NWSL season. .
But my body literally wouldn’t let me “work harder” to get back.
When you lose the thing that you dedicated your entire life to, when you have to drastically reduce your daily activities, and when the sole purpose of your entire day is to just get through the day with minimal symptoms, it makes you think about life differently.
I asked myself questions I never pondered before:
Why do I want to play soccer so badly? Who am I if I don’t have soccer? Why am I so desperate to find answers? What’s the purpose of my life?
It is this self-examination of my motives and feelings behind my aspirations that has had the most profound impact on my life-far beyond any workout regimen, diet, or training strategy.
My concussion has been by far my biggest life teacher.
The extreme lack of resources out there for proper concussion treatment is astounding. I have searched far and wide for answers, traveled across the country and up to Canada to see a neck specialist, implemented a new nutrition plan, and tried out dozens of other unconventional approaches (which I plan to write about).
I want to share what I have learned. But above all, I want to provide hope for anyone who is going through a difficult time, even if it’s not a concussion.
Even though my symptoms were immobilizing, the internal struggle far exceeded the physical pain.
I know that feeling of hopelessness and loneliness: no one understands my situation, why do things like this always happy to me, will I ever get better?
We all have our own unique struggle, that’s no better or worse than anyone else’s. It’s just life.
And this is mine.
I have a separate “my concussion story” section on Arrow Living in which I will continue telling my story, as well as interview specialists, and people who have helped me along the way.
If you know anyone whom you think this would help. Please pass it along.
Full written article: http://www.arrowliving.com/why-i-saw-strange-men-in-my-room-and-am-telling-you-about-it-9-months-later/
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