New Kinship

David Frank and TJ Espinoza

Welcome to New Kinship, where we are exploring and renewing ideas of belonging, desire, and being a neighbor in the Kingdom of Jesus. Together we are pursuing the communion and shalom of the church and the world. Pull up a chair and join the conversation! newkinship.substack.com

  1. HACE 3 DÍAS

    #71 – Can Desire Be Redeemed? Joel Carini on Sin, Psychology, and the Reformed Imagination

    What is the nature of sin and desire? At a theological level? We’re diving in with Joel Carini (from The Natural Theologian) for a theological conversation about desire, sin, attraction, and the resources that the reformed theological tradition has (or doesn’t have) for same-sex-attracted, celibate Christians. Also includes: comparisons to psychology vs. biblical counseling, and how Harry Potter had comparable challenges. — Note: We use the terms “Side A” and “Side B” as shorthand quite a bit. If you’re new to the conversation, here’s a quick explanation. We also recommend listening to our episode #3, “A-B-Y-X | 4 Sides on SSA/Gay Sexuality.” * “Side A” generally refers to the perspective that affirms God can bless same-sex marriage and sexual relationships. Sides B, X, and Y all represent perspectives that uphold the historic Christian sexual ethic of marriage between a man and a woman, and sex within marriage. Specific perspectives differ beyond that: * “Side B” recognizes people experience same-sex sexual attraction and may describe that experience by a variety of words or identity terms while still holding to the historical Christian sexual ethic. * ”Side X” tends to emphasize the possibility of sexual orientation change, and ministers to gay people toward the aim of being “ex gay.” * “Side Y” tends to avoid naming any kind of identity language associated with LGBT concerns, with the goal of not taking on an identity of being “gay.” ★ About Our Guest Joel Carini is a Ph.D. candidate in philosophy at Saint Louis University. He holds an MDiv from Westminster Theological Seminary and an MA from the University of Chicago. He publishes regularly at his Substack and YouTube at The Natural Theologian. Joel’s previous episode on New Kinship is: #29 - Weigh and Consider the World: Joel Carini on Nature, Truth, and Side B — ★ Timestamps (00:00) #71 – Can Desire Be Redeemed? Joel Carini on Sin, Psychology, and the Reformed Imagination (00:46) Becoming a straight ally and public thinker (08:20) The tone of the Christian conversation at Wheaton (16:09) Why might someone take on “Side Y”? (26:27) Are some desires categorically sinful? Could Jesus have even possibly sinned? (37:39) Theology (and psychology) from nature? vs. a “Biblicist” approach. Plus Harry Potter + Voldemort. (55:39) “Original sin” as a disease? (01:06:42) Advice for engaging Side Y perspectives (01:13:49) Vision for the future of the “Side B project” — ★ Links and References * Video: Tim Keller and Kevin DeYoung on the PCA’s Report on Human Sexuality (2021): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JWQPFvtzck * Joel’s interview episode with Colton Beach: The Christian Life: A Walk in the Park? A Conversation with a Gay Christian * A Quiet Mind to Suffer With by John Andrew Bryant (2023). * Anna Carini’s podcast episode of Consult the Counselor, on OCD: Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (July 1, 2025) Some names dropped, for your easier internet searching :) of course: Ulrich Zwingli was a reformer of the Protestant Reformation; Philip Ryken is president of Wheaton College; Harry Potter and Voldemort is a fantasy book that…should not be hard to find. — ★ Send us feedback, questions, comments, and support: Email: communionandshalom@gmail.com | Instagram: @newkinship | Substack: @newkinship | Patreon: @newkinship — ★ Credits Creators and Hosts: David Frank, TJ Espinoza, Tyler Parker | Audio Engineer: Carl Swenson, carlswensonmusic.com | Podcast Manager: Elena F. | Graphic Designer: Gavin Popken, gavinpopkenart.com ★ Get full access to New Kinship at newkinship.substack.com/subscribe

    1 h y 22 min
  2. BONUS - How Ethical Is Accumulating Wealth? Middle-Class Money in Community, with Lakshmi and Erin

    23 OCT · CONTENIDO EXTRA

    BONUS - How Ethical Is Accumulating Wealth? Middle-Class Money in Community, with Lakshmi and Erin

    David, Lakshmi, and Erin dig into the intersection of wealth, faith, and community, particularly from the standpoint of middle-class Christians. Sparked by Lakshmi’s seminary research on Christian engagement with wealth accumulation in a neoliberal capitalist system, we explored theological and practical approaches to wealth: What does it mean to have or accumulate wealth? What are the impacts of capitalism? the role of intentional Christian communities? and the balance between personal finances and larger systemic (in)justice? Can we create alternative economic systems grounded in Christian values of mutuality and relationship? Check out Lakshmi’s work on communities at her Substack Dwelling Place! ★ Resources/Links/References: * Wealth as Peril and Obligation by Sandra Eli Wheeler  * The Principle of Maximums by Roger L. Stichter * True Riches by John Cortines and Gregory Baumer * Beyond Charity by John Perkins * The Life You Can Save by Peter Singer * Practicing the King’s Economy by Michael Rhodes, Robby Holt, and Brian Fikkert * The Unjust Steward: Wealth, Poverty, and the Church Today by Escobar, Miguel * When God Made You by Matthew Paul Turner (illustrated by David Catrow) ★ Timestamps (00:00) Introduction and Guest Introductions (01:37) Lakshmi’s Journey and Thoughts on Wealth (03:33) Erin’s Perspective on Wealth and Justice (05:10) Who Is Wealthy? (09:45) New Challenges in Neoliberal Capitalism (12:32) Community and Economic Systems (23:49)  Wealth as Peril and Obligation according to the New Testament (27:32) Possessions, Wealth and Practical Faithfulness (33:53) Joy beyond Guilt (35:47) Approaches to Faith and Wealth (40:16) Personality, Character, and Wealth (48:44) Challenging Assumptions About Wealth and Virtue (49:52) Economic Justice and Personal Responsibility (50:59) Middle Class Mindset and Community Investment (52:38) Navigating Power Dynamics in Personal Relationships (53:36) The Role of Reciprocity in Building Community (54:56) Class Perception and Social Mobility (01:03:44) Intentional Christian Communities and Wealth (01:05:45) Effective Altruism vs. Relational Giving (01:07:19) Is Guilt Good for Generosity? (01:09:35) The Importance of Relocation and Local Impact (01:17:53) Final Reflections on Wealth and Responsibility—★ Send us feedback, questions, comments, and support! || Email: communionandshalom@gmail.com | Instagram: @newkinship | Substack: @newkinship — ★ Credits || Creators and Hosts: David Frank, TJ Espinoza, Tyler Parker | Audio Engineer: Carl Swenson, carlswensonmusic.com | Podcast Manager: Elena F. | Graphic Designer: Gavin Popken, gavinpopkenart.com ★ Get full access to New Kinship at newkinship.substack.com/subscribe

    1 h y 35 min
  3. 8 OCT

    #70 - Who’s Afraid of Dependence? with Leah Libresco Sargeant

    “ In our society is a big assumption that what it means to be truly, fully human is to not need other people… So you face a choice: is it fundamentally a bad thing to be a person? Or, is our account of a person as ‘someone who’s independent and autonomous’ fundamentally untrue? And [if so] we have to make room for our genuine neediness in our account of what it means to be human and what we owe to each other.” Author Leah Libresco Sargeant joined New Kinship to talk about building community, relationships, and need. We discussed practical ways of building Christian community from her second book, Building the Benedict Option: A Guide to Gathering Two or Three Together in His Name. And we dived into her just-released third book, The Dignity of Dependence: A Feminist Manifesto, about an anthropology of need, justice, and care. Vulnerability, it turns out, isn’t just for women/children/elders/the weak. It’s for all of us. ★ About Our Guest Leah Libresco Sargeant is the author of The Dignity of Dependence (as well as Arriving at Amen and Building the Benedict Option). She runs the Substack Other Feminisms, which focuses on how to advocate for women as women in a world that makes an idol of autonomy. She lives in Maryland and works in family policy in D.C. — ★ Timestamps (00:00) #70 - Who’s Afraid of Dependence? with Leah Libresco Sargeant (05:09) Overview: Building the Benedict Option - generating community (16:28) Catholic resources for building neighborhood community (26:50) What we give up, for community (30:08) Overview: The Dignity of Dependence (33:27) “Personalism” and recommended sources (36:12) Equality of men and women ≠ interchangeability (40:47) Does dependence rely on hierarchy relationships? (43:19) How we measure labor with market logic (and shouldn’t) (49:44) Women’s “porous” experience of the world, and our theology of the church as feminine — ★ Send us feedback, questions, comments, and support! Email: communionandshalom@gmail.com | Instagram: @newkinship | Substack: @newkinship | Patreon: @newkinship — ★ Credits Creators and Hosts: David Frank, TJ Espinoza, Tyler Parker | Audio Engineer: Carl Swenson, carlswensonmusic.com | Podcast Manager: Elena F. | Graphic Designer: Gavin Popken, gavinpopkenart.com ★ Get full access to New Kinship at newkinship.substack.com/subscribe

    58 min
  4. 17 SEP

    #69 - The Christian Story of Sex and Marriage with Tyler Parker (Part 2)

    “Paul [in 1st Corinthians] really does seem to think that what I do with my body, Christ has done with his body. Like, when I use my body to abuse other people, I have taken Christ's body and used it to abuse people, which for a Christian is the maximum sacrilege that you could do. But when I do something loving or caring or giving… I have taken Jesus' body and blessed others with it.” So. You heard part 1. (If not, it’s here: #68 - The Christian Story of Sex and Marriage, with Tyler Parker (Part 1)) Now you’re back for part 2. We’ve got a lot more for you: Join us for the tour through Numbers, Deuteronomy, the Gospels, Romans, and 1st Corinthians… We touch on themes of idolatry, adultery, how Jesus was super single, and what this means for… well, anyone with a body: single or married, straight or sexual minorities, broken and definitely beautiful. Please listen and then send your comments, questions, disagreements, and general angst. Links below. We’d love to hear from you! (For those of us less attuned to sarcasm: If you email the gmail address Tyler named at the end of this episode, the poor guy on the other end of that email will not know what you’re talking about. 😆 Please just contact TJ, or any of us, at the email and Substack links below!) — Note: This episode uses the terms “Side A” and “Side B” (and X, Y) as shorthand quite a bit. If you’re new to the conversation, you might find it helpful to check out episode #3, where we talk through the four “sides”: ⁠#3 - A-B-Y-X | 4 Sides on SSA/Gay Sexuality⁠ — ★ Timestamps (00:00) #69 - The Christian Story of Sex and Marriage with Tyler Parker (Part 2) (00:15) A quick summary of Part 1 (02:43) "Tselem"=little statues, images of God (07:29) Paul on conjugal rights: How consent images God (and coercion does not) (16:07) Deuteronomy: "For the sake of the world who is watching..." (27:48) Idolatry: "I don't want you to settle for less(er gods)" (34:06) Numbers: the tie between idolatry and adultery (39:22) Paul in Romans 1: When we worship a creature instead (52:33) So...what does this mean for Side B? How Jesus was single (01:04:52) "Sex is not the only way I can use my body to demonstrate God in the world." (01:11:38) "We're gonna fuse bodies..." (01:14:28) Marriage as a metaphor for God, and its limits — ★ Send us feedback, questions, comments, and support! Email: communionandshalom@gmail.com | Instagram: @newkinship | Substack: @newkinship | Patreon: @newkinship — ★ Credits Creators and Hosts: David Frank, TJ Espinoza, Tyler Parker | Audio Engineer: Carl Swenson, carlswensonmusic.com | Podcast Manager: Elena F. | Graphic Designer: Gavin Popken, gavinpopkenart.com ★ Get full access to New Kinship at newkinship.substack.com/subscribe

    1 h y 25 min
  5. 27 AGO

    #68 - The Christian Story of Sex and Marriage, with Tyler Parker (Part 1)

    What is marriage actually for? What is sex for? The way we answer these questions reveal the stories we tell ourselves and each other. So then: what is the story we see unfolding in the Bible? And what would it look like for the Christian story to be our primary narrative? In this episode, Tyler Parker takes us through the first part of the Biblical story. God’s kingdom on earth, how human marriage plays a role, what makes marriage a unique relationship, good stuff. And then we touch on the Christian story’s implications for same-sex marriage, serial monogamy, hookup relationships, and other expressions of sexuality. And then we realized this was a big topic and saved a few questions to Part 2. Stay tuned for that! Part 2 can be found here: https://open.substack.com/pub/newkinship/p/69-the-christian-story-of-sex-and Finally: We note the need for a Catholic voice to join this conversation, so—if you have a recommendation, please get in touch! — Note: This episode uses the terms “Side A” and “Side B” (and X, Y) as shorthand. If you’re new to the conversation, you might find it helpful to check out episode #3, where we talk through the four “sides”: ⁠#3 - A-B-Y-X | 4 Sides on SSA/Gay Sexuality⁠ — ★ Timestamps (00:00) #68 - The Christian Story of Sex and Marriage with Tyler Parker (Part 1) (03:58) Why we start with narrative (08:08) The Bible's creation myth: a God who makes order from chaos (12:56) The dimorphic expression of God's image (20:14) God rested: He made a home for himself, with humans (26:00) "Ezer": a helper who does what you cannot (30:16) "Kenegdo": marriage isn't just union, it's REunion. (41:47) A symbol of fruitfulness--but what is a symbol? We note the need for a Catholic voice. (54:18) What about the church and other communities? Does marriage "colonize" all the good things about human unions? (01:03:11) "Porneia": what is NOT good, in God's narrative (01:17:23) In which we decide we'll need a Part 2 — ★ Send us feedback, questions, comments, and support! Email: communionandshalom@gmail.com | Instagram: @newkinship | Substack: @newkinship | Patreon: @newkinship — ★ Credits Co-Hosts: David Frank, TJ Espinoza, Tyler Parker | Audio Engineer: Carl Swenson, carlswensonmusic.com | Podcast Manager: Elena F. | Graphic Designer: Gavin Popken, gavinpopkenart.com ★ Get full access to New Kinship at newkinship.substack.com/subscribe

    1 h y 21 min
  6. #67 - Ron Koustas's Testimony of Staying: Caregiving and Church Ministry in the AIDS Crisis

    6 AGO

    #67 - Ron Koustas's Testimony of Staying: Caregiving and Church Ministry in the AIDS Crisis

    In LGBT and Christian communities, Ron Koustas has seen a lot. When his longtime partner was diagnosed with AIDS—in the early years before life-saving medications were available—Ron became his partner’s caregiver. As he revisited the Christian faith of his youth, Ron eventually joined and then served in ministries to gay folks in New York City. He’s seen ex-gay churches try to help people “become straight.” He’s seen churches love gay people well, and also poorly. He’s been part of several close “chosen families.” He’s been asked hurtful questions, been defended by church people, been asked to defend himself, and has continued to serve and support fellow believers through the process. We are fascinated by Ron’s story over the years and encouraged by his continued, joyful pursuit of Jesus and his church. ★ About Our Guest Ron Koustas, now retired from federal service, has spent over 30 years leading AIDS outreach efforts in NYC and Northern NJ churches, including playing a pivotal role in Hope For New York’s AIDS Ministry. His ministry has been featured in Christianity Today’s Leadership Journal and Michael Slaughter’s book unLearning Church. More recently, prompted by pastoral encouragement, Ron has embraced the Side B community and now actively engages with younger members through his NJ Revoice Chapter. He continues to serve as a breakout speaker at the annual Revoice Conference. — Note: This episode uses the terms “Side A” and “Side B” (and X, Y) as shorthand quite a bit. If you’re new to the conversation, you might find it helpful to check out episode #3, where we talk through the four “sides”: ⁠#3 - A-B-Y-X | 4 Sides on SSA/Gay Sexuality⁠ — ★ Timestamps (00:00) #67 - Ron Koustas's Testimony of Staying: Caregiving and Church Ministry in the AIDS Crisis (01:42) Ron's story: supporting his gay partner with AIDS (21:07) "Ex-gay" church ministries: "Are you gay or a Christian?" (30:42) Moving out of ex-gay spaces and into Revoice circles (45:15) What is good (still?) about loving your partner? (52:28) Joining a new church: "If you're gay, what are you doing here?" (57:21) Advice for feeling settled, chosen families — ★ Send us feedback, questions, comments, and support! Email: communionandshalom@gmail.com | Instagram: @newkinship | Substack: @newkinship | Patreon: @newkinship — ★ Credits Creators and Hosts: David Frank, TJ Espinoza | Audio Engineer: Carl Swenson, carlswensonmusic.com | Podcast Manager: Elena F. | Graphic Designer: Gavin Popken, gavinpopkenart.com ★ Get full access to New Kinship at newkinship.substack.com/subscribe

    1 h y 4 min

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Welcome to New Kinship, where we are exploring and renewing ideas of belonging, desire, and being a neighbor in the Kingdom of Jesus. Together we are pursuing the communion and shalom of the church and the world. Pull up a chair and join the conversation! newkinship.substack.com