14 min

542. Absolute Honesty Women World Leaders' Podcast

    • Christianity

Honesty is a character quality we look for in others, but do we actually scrutinize ourselves for honesty in the same way?  How honest are we with ourselves, when it comes to being honest? Join Julie Harwick as she dives into this subject.
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Welcome to Women World Leaders podcast. I’m your host, Julie Harwick. Thank you for joining me today as we celebrate God’s grace in our lives, in this ministry and around the world.
A mom questions her 3-year-old who’s mouth is ringed with blue dye.  “You’re telling me you didn’t have any candy today?”  “I haven’t,” he answers sweetly shaking his head.  “You can have one more time to tell me the truth,” she warns. “Really, I haven’t,” he responds as if he can’t imagine why she would ask such a thing. “Then what is all over your face," she asks. With a growing realization he says, as he attempts to look truly puzzled, “Oh, blue?”…”Well…. I forgot that I ate that.” 
It’s hard not to chuckle at this type of lying because it’s just further evidence that 3-year-olds are not as smart as they think they are. And they’re still in the process of learning that telling lies is not the way to get out of a sticky situation. But 3-year-olds grow up and unfortunately, lying often continues to be a part of their lives.  We were all 3 once and our parents probably took lying very seriously and tried to teach us that it was wrong, but that doesn’t mean we never do it.
While we might not be guilty of telling such a blatant lie as the 3-year-old, we may very well be guilty of misrepresenting, misleading, saying what someone wants to hear whether we actually believe it or not or exaggerating. If you’re not guilty of any of those yourself, you probably know someone who is.  It’s not “technically” a lie, but it’s likely to cause the hearer to arrive at a slightly different conclusion than what is the actual truth.  And generally, the motive for doing it is to manipulate a desired outcome.
Sometimes, what is not said falls into this category. Many years ago, I had a co-worker who seemed to believe that she was in competition with me and needed to make our employer question my value. She was definitely within earshot when a supervisor asked me to leave the office to get some paperwork he needed. Later, when the owner asked her where I was, she answered, “She didn’t tell me where she was going.” That was a true statement. I hadn’t specifically told her where I was going, but there was no question that she knew.  The way she answered made him believe that I had left without letting anyone know and that she didn’t know where I went. The information she gave him accomplished her intent of making me look irresponsible because he had a wrong impression of the situation.
Have you ever confronted an older child about some item around the house being broken and gotten a vague response like, ”I haven’t used it”?  In the back of your mind you’re wondering if they’re saying under their breath, “today.” The response might be technically true, but they certainly have more information that is relevant to the question, but it’s not in their best interest to share that. As kids get older, they get a little craftier at getting out of things they don’t want to do without actually telling a lie.  “I would do my chores now, but I have a test to study for.” They may very well have a test to study for, but they have no intention of spending all their remaining waking hours studying for it.  I once knew a boy who didn’t like to take a shower.  He would turn on the shower, retrieve a book he had stashed in the bathroom cabinet and read for 15 minutes.  Then he’d wet the washcloth and wipe it across the top of his head so his hair was wet and use it to dampen a towel. If he was specifically questioned about taking a shower, he would say that he had, because days earlier, he actually had.  There are all kinds of g

Honesty is a character quality we look for in others, but do we actually scrutinize ourselves for honesty in the same way?  How honest are we with ourselves, when it comes to being honest? Join Julie Harwick as she dives into this subject.
****
Welcome to Women World Leaders podcast. I’m your host, Julie Harwick. Thank you for joining me today as we celebrate God’s grace in our lives, in this ministry and around the world.
A mom questions her 3-year-old who’s mouth is ringed with blue dye.  “You’re telling me you didn’t have any candy today?”  “I haven’t,” he answers sweetly shaking his head.  “You can have one more time to tell me the truth,” she warns. “Really, I haven’t,” he responds as if he can’t imagine why she would ask such a thing. “Then what is all over your face," she asks. With a growing realization he says, as he attempts to look truly puzzled, “Oh, blue?”…”Well…. I forgot that I ate that.” 
It’s hard not to chuckle at this type of lying because it’s just further evidence that 3-year-olds are not as smart as they think they are. And they’re still in the process of learning that telling lies is not the way to get out of a sticky situation. But 3-year-olds grow up and unfortunately, lying often continues to be a part of their lives.  We were all 3 once and our parents probably took lying very seriously and tried to teach us that it was wrong, but that doesn’t mean we never do it.
While we might not be guilty of telling such a blatant lie as the 3-year-old, we may very well be guilty of misrepresenting, misleading, saying what someone wants to hear whether we actually believe it or not or exaggerating. If you’re not guilty of any of those yourself, you probably know someone who is.  It’s not “technically” a lie, but it’s likely to cause the hearer to arrive at a slightly different conclusion than what is the actual truth.  And generally, the motive for doing it is to manipulate a desired outcome.
Sometimes, what is not said falls into this category. Many years ago, I had a co-worker who seemed to believe that she was in competition with me and needed to make our employer question my value. She was definitely within earshot when a supervisor asked me to leave the office to get some paperwork he needed. Later, when the owner asked her where I was, she answered, “She didn’t tell me where she was going.” That was a true statement. I hadn’t specifically told her where I was going, but there was no question that she knew.  The way she answered made him believe that I had left without letting anyone know and that she didn’t know where I went. The information she gave him accomplished her intent of making me look irresponsible because he had a wrong impression of the situation.
Have you ever confronted an older child about some item around the house being broken and gotten a vague response like, ”I haven’t used it”?  In the back of your mind you’re wondering if they’re saying under their breath, “today.” The response might be technically true, but they certainly have more information that is relevant to the question, but it’s not in their best interest to share that. As kids get older, they get a little craftier at getting out of things they don’t want to do without actually telling a lie.  “I would do my chores now, but I have a test to study for.” They may very well have a test to study for, but they have no intention of spending all their remaining waking hours studying for it.  I once knew a boy who didn’t like to take a shower.  He would turn on the shower, retrieve a book he had stashed in the bathroom cabinet and read for 15 minutes.  Then he’d wet the washcloth and wipe it across the top of his head so his hair was wet and use it to dampen a towel. If he was specifically questioned about taking a shower, he would say that he had, because days earlier, he actually had.  There are all kinds of g

14 min