100 episodes

Jason Bowers, Kurt Fitzpatrick, and Les Kurkendaal-Barrett are three guys who try to make sense of movies that they watch on Lifetime and The Hallmark Channel. Listen as they do a deep dive into these movies and try to make sense of them. It's a hilarious look at the wonderful world of romantic comedies and beyond.

A Lifetime of Hallmark Les Kurkendaal-Barrett

    • TV & Film
    • 4.1 • 25 Ratings

Jason Bowers, Kurt Fitzpatrick, and Les Kurkendaal-Barrett are three guys who try to make sense of movies that they watch on Lifetime and The Hallmark Channel. Listen as they do a deep dive into these movies and try to make sense of them. It's a hilarious look at the wonderful world of romantic comedies and beyond.

    Lacey Chabert Spends Her Winter in Vail Eating Strudel of the Non-Toaster Variety

    Lacey Chabert Spends Her Winter in Vail Eating Strudel of the Non-Toaster Variety

    Les, Kurt, and Jason are excited to kick of their 2021 Hallmark movie viewing with a new one from Lacey Chabert, Winter in Vail. Kurt may be the most excited, though, since he did some social media digging into the lives of the movie's extras. We learn of a new Lacey Chabert specific Hallmark movie trope (the inherited property), which leads to the question: what would YOUR specific Hallmark movie trope be? Les would certainly be the Hallmark eavesdropper (and has THOUGHTS about how to properly do it). This movie is all about strudel, and it didn't even dawn on the guys until the very end that Lacey's character in Mean Girls claimed that her dad invented Toaster Strudel. Plus, Uncle Grady may not have been the one from Sanford and Son, but he may very well have once had relations with a real-estate agent named Bev (or maybe his best friend Carl). Les gets mad at the German inaccuracies, Jason hates the lazy LA bashing, and Kurt is now (falsely) claiming to represent Elisabeth Shue. 
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    Theme song generously donated by purple-planet.com

    • 1 hr 32 min
    Fatal Fiancé Rings in 2021 with More Chloroform and a Dash of Arsenic

    Fatal Fiancé Rings in 2021 with More Chloroform and a Dash of Arsenic

    Les, Kurt, and Jason debate whether Les actually spoiled Cobra Kai's season 3 on his social media after Kurt put him on blast, but Jason doesn't think it's a spoiler if the information is used to promote the show (so no spoiler here: Elisabeth Shue makes an appearance). In Blac Chyna news, we learn that Rob Kardashian doesn't want their daughter Dream to twerk. And in our Squibster of June Squibb news, we learn that June is BFF's with Lupito Nyong'o, and that June used to have a career as a female Fabio. Then, the guys walk down the aisle with Lifetime's Fatal Fiancé, a movie that may be the start of a new franchise (though is not, regrettably, part of a trilogy that also includes Fatal Attraction and the Whoopi Goldberg movie Fatal Beauty). Fatal Fiancé is packed with soap stars and insane amounts of exposition as well as the world's most clearly labeled bottle of chloroform ever. This is the perfect episode to listen to as your hiding in the backseat of a Hyundai Veloster! 
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    Instagram : lifetimeofhallmarkpodcast
    Theme song generously donated by purple-planet.com

    • 1 hr 38 min
    A Christmas Carousel Circles the Drain and is Still Better Than King Ralph

    A Christmas Carousel Circles the Drain and is Still Better Than King Ralph

    Les, Kurt, and Jason question why Aunt Viv from The Fresh Prince of Bel Air is going after Lori Loughlin (who's out of prison) and finally launch Squibbster, their long-anticipated update on all things June Squibb. Then the guys take a ride on Hallmark's Christmas Carousel, a royal-themed holiday movie set in the ficticious country of Ancadia. Or is it Anaconda? Or Arcadia? It's hard to tell with all those bad accidents and even worse toupees. It's even harder to tell when the royal family's assistant isn't doing her job resulting in a proposed rehearsed SOLO of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" (aka a song as repetitive and non-solo-worthy as "Row Row Row Your Boat").  Pop a Molly (figuratively, of course, nobody's actually advocating drug use) and head to your nearest Courtyard by Marriot with your HR team because it's hirin' season!
    Facebook : alifetimeofhallmark
    Instagram : lifetimeofhallmarkpodcast
    Theme song generously donated by purple-planet.com

    • 1 hr 42 min
    The Christmas Setup Gives us An Adorable Gay Couple, a Fantastic Fran Dresher, and Discussions of Cargo Shorts and Crippling Medical Debt

    The Christmas Setup Gives us An Adorable Gay Couple, a Fantastic Fran Dresher, and Discussions of Cargo Shorts and Crippling Medical Debt

    Les, Kurt, and Jason discuss the Blac Chyna of Christmas Past and Lori Loughlin getting out of jail soon (which is good because Kurt is concerned she may not have enough lunch money). Then, the guys unwrap the gift that is Lifetime's The Christmas Setup. Unlike the same sex couples in recent Hallmark movies, this one features a same sex couple as the main storyline, and it's so good that the guys think it may be one of the best movies they've every watched for the podcast (and not in the way that, say, Killer Contractor was great). Fran Dresher leads a cast that all give great performances (and Les doesn't think so simply because he partly owes his SAG card to Fran Dresher) in between promos for Lifetime's upcoming biopics about Wendy Williams, TLC, and Salt 'n' Pepa. We'd tell you more, but being bound by an NDA is exhausting, so you should just listen!
    Facebook : alifetimeofhallmark
    Instagram : lifetimeofhallmarkpodcast
    Theme song generously donated by purple-planet.com
    Up on a Housetop Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/
     
     
     

    • 1 hr 56 min
    Christmas Comes Twice So Avengers Endgame Rules of Time Travel Can Make Us Cry

    Christmas Comes Twice So Avengers Endgame Rules of Time Travel Can Make Us Cry

    Les’ internet gave Kurt and Jason a chance to discuss, at length, the Dukes of Hazard Spinoff Enus, which leads to a conversation about Sheriff Lobo, which leads to a conversation about Nell Carter (obviously). Then we learn about the newest player in the Blac Chyna Cinematic Universe, Lil Twin (and the spelling of his friend’s name leads us down a very particular rabbit hole because Jason made the mistake of Googling. But it turns out that the Lil Twin news is the perfect segue into Hallmark’s Christmas Comes Twice since it stars Tamera Mowry-Housley, one of the twins from Sister Sister. Despite the name, the movie is not about twins but does involve time travel (a subject Les is convinced he’s an expert in because he’s seen Avengers: Endgame). And even though all three guys thought the movie was actually really good (and they all cried!), they still found plenty to dissect. Why does that ride feature strawberries? Why is Miss Nelson so lazy? Who needs 500 forks? Should Enus be rebooted in 2020? Listen to get your answers! 
     
    Facebook : alifetimeofhallmark
    Instagram : lifetimeofhallmarkpodcast
    Theme song generously donated by purple-planet.com

    • 1 hr 35 min
    A Recipe For Seduction Never Gives the Ingredients to Duncan Hines

    A Recipe For Seduction Never Gives the Ingredients to Duncan Hines

    Les, Kurt, and Jason have gathered for a bonus episode to discuss Lifetime’s self-described Mini-movie, A Recipe for Seduction. Yup, this is the movie with a sexy Colonel Sanders played by Mario Lopez. The guys are well aware that they’re doing a recap of branded content, but they’re ok with it since they learn that the real Colonel Sanders wasn’t really a military colonel as much as he was the OG Blac Chyna of his day and Sara Lee may have been the gay BFF of Colonel Sanders (soon-to-be) wife. 
    Facebook : alifetimeofhallmarkInstagram : lifetimeofhallmarkpodcastTheme song generously donated by purple-planet.com

    • 29 min

Customer Reviews

4.1 out of 5
25 Ratings

25 Ratings

fuzzcritter ,

Thank you.

I’ve never watched Hallmark Christmas movies before, and I found them painfully predictable. Which in 2020 is exactly what I need. While I know loads of people who religiously watch these movies, I don’t like any of them, so this podcasts made me feel like I have friends to discuss/make fun of the movies with.
Based on listening to you describe lifetime movies, I will be going back and watching those movies while I workout and then listening to you talk about them because they sound bonkers.

Bbarett ,

Perfect for the Holidays

I listened today while cooking for Thanksgiving and it was perfect . I laughed until my stomach hurt . These guys are funny

jacquettas ,

Super Fun Gentle Takedowns

If you love bad romance Hallmark style you, have found your tribe. The team and guests break down every trope you’ve come to expect from TV romance originals. Very funny and well done.

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